Essay Instructions: admit.washington.edu/Admission/Transfer/Statement
This is my first revision of my Essay, I am short of the minimum by about 100 words. Any advice is appreciated.
It's eleven years ago, and I'm splayed out on my stomach, legs kicking in the air as I keep my chin propped up in my hands, a patient spectator to the sport of my father's frustration. An old desktop computer is in pieces before us on the kitchen floor, and my dad's struggling not to curse in front of me as he can't make the thing give up the ghost, and let him have the hard drive he's been struggling to salvage. My dad's fascination with everything technological and mechanical was an inspiration for me as a child; Instead of playing dolls and dress up, I built catapults out of popsicle sticks and moving cars with erector sets. I began to develop a deep and profound love for anything else scientific as a bond between my father and I.
From then on I knew that I wanted to do something in science. But It took me many years to figure out that I wanted to learn more about how my dad's computers worked. I had lacked direction for some time, until one evening a news story came up on the tv about gender disparities within the field of computer science. How women from a young age were not encouraged to explore these more men-dominated fields on the basis of gender stereotypes. My entire childhood rebelled against the idea that I, as a woman, could not find Computer Sciences interesting, or that I could never do well at mathematics. I had grown up helping my dad get those hard drives out; In Junior high I began to teach myself how to do the coding for making my own custom profile pages online. later on I even asked for a copy of C++ For Dummies for my birthday and began learning a programming language on my own. That's when I finally realized: Why am I not pursuing computer science? All this time I had enjoyed tinkering with computers in some form or another, and I'd not considered pursuing this as my career.
This gave me direction in my studies; I made sure to excel in my math and science classes, and my academics became my major focus. I wanted to prove that yes, I am a woman, and yes, I like to work on computers. I knew this would require me to excel in my math and sciences, and I achieved this through graduating with honors, in high school and my community college. My biggest hurdle in pushing myself has been the financial side of things -- my family lives on the ragged edge of the middle class, and while we can support ourselves funding my education is out of the question. As I pursued my AA I had to study part time in order to work to afford my education. I plan to look even more into scholarships and financial funding to help ease this burden, as I move into the next step of my education.
And as apart of that next step, the decision to go to UW has always been the end goal of my studies; I planned to transfer here because I know UW's Institutute of Technology is known to have one of the best computer science programs in the country. It's prided as a challenging environment that delivers direct experience for the real word, and I feel it's a perfect fit for me, someone whom has already had some real experience in learning this field of study. Now it's time to take that next step. I've (finally) settled on my aspirations to earn a Major in Computer Science, and some day work for an innovative tech company, perhaps even at a local software company such as Microsoft. I feel UWT is the perfect place for me to get there; A local university known for great education in the field of STEM. I aim to bring diversity as a woman in a field often dominated by men, and gain the education I need at UWT.
This is my first revision of my Essay, I am short of the minimum by about 100 words. Any advice is appreciated.
It's eleven years ago, and I'm splayed out on my stomach, legs kicking in the air as I keep my chin propped up in my hands, a patient spectator to the sport of my father's frustration. An old desktop computer is in pieces before us on the kitchen floor, and my dad's struggling not to curse in front of me as he can't make the thing give up the ghost, and let him have the hard drive he's been struggling to salvage. My dad's fascination with everything technological and mechanical was an inspiration for me as a child; Instead of playing dolls and dress up, I built catapults out of popsicle sticks and moving cars with erector sets. I began to develop a deep and profound love for anything else scientific as a bond between my father and I.
From then on I knew that I wanted to do something in science. But It took me many years to figure out that I wanted to learn more about how my dad's computers worked. I had lacked direction for some time, until one evening a news story came up on the tv about gender disparities within the field of computer science. How women from a young age were not encouraged to explore these more men-dominated fields on the basis of gender stereotypes. My entire childhood rebelled against the idea that I, as a woman, could not find Computer Sciences interesting, or that I could never do well at mathematics. I had grown up helping my dad get those hard drives out; In Junior high I began to teach myself how to do the coding for making my own custom profile pages online. later on I even asked for a copy of C++ For Dummies for my birthday and began learning a programming language on my own. That's when I finally realized: Why am I not pursuing computer science? All this time I had enjoyed tinkering with computers in some form or another, and I'd not considered pursuing this as my career.
This gave me direction in my studies; I made sure to excel in my math and science classes, and my academics became my major focus. I wanted to prove that yes, I am a woman, and yes, I like to work on computers. I knew this would require me to excel in my math and sciences, and I achieved this through graduating with honors, in high school and my community college. My biggest hurdle in pushing myself has been the financial side of things -- my family lives on the ragged edge of the middle class, and while we can support ourselves funding my education is out of the question. As I pursued my AA I had to study part time in order to work to afford my education. I plan to look even more into scholarships and financial funding to help ease this burden, as I move into the next step of my education.
And as apart of that next step, the decision to go to UW has always been the end goal of my studies; I planned to transfer here because I know UW's Institutute of Technology is known to have one of the best computer science programs in the country. It's prided as a challenging environment that delivers direct experience for the real word, and I feel it's a perfect fit for me, someone whom has already had some real experience in learning this field of study. Now it's time to take that next step. I've (finally) settled on my aspirations to earn a Major in Computer Science, and some day work for an innovative tech company, perhaps even at a local software company such as Microsoft. I feel UWT is the perfect place for me to get there; A local university known for great education in the field of STEM. I aim to bring diversity as a woman in a field often dominated by men, and gain the education I need at UWT.