Some students have a background, identity,interest or talent...
This is my essay for the common app prompt 1, I'm writing about my interest,talent in mathematics,any suggestion is very welcome!
I haven't been always the boy passionate about math that I am now. In fact, I think there was a point when I hated it. Perhaps it was because that systematic and creativity-oppressive way I learned it in elementary school.
Since I can remember, I've always been a curious guy, enthusiastic about logic and puzzles. The toy of my childhood was a Rubik's cube rather than a Hot Wheels car, I preferred to solve the Sudoku in the newspaper instead of reading the children's section. But when I went to school, all of it was gone and I was bored in the math class. The worst part of all was that I felt the same way in all of the other subjects in school, but I knew that math could be something distinct. All the subjects were the same to me in school but not at home. I could fall asleep in one minute reading a History or Geography book, but spend the whole night trying to solve every riddle in the magazine I bought every weekend. It wasn't until my first year in Middle School that I realized the true meaning of math, a subject that challenges your creativity and imagination to solve problems.
That was Six years ago, my school was invited to a math contest and I decided to participate. Prior to take they test, a course was offered in order to get the contestants acquainted with the kind of problems. It was like entering into a whole new world, the Antonio leaving that classroom after that course would never be the same. The teacher told us one problem: "Try to get the sum of 1+2+3+...1000, but, in less than one minute". I laughed because I thought it was impossible, but when he told us the solution I was astonished. Gauss is a famous mathematician who solved it long time ago. The brilliance and simplicity he did it is just amazing. After that day, I found my devotion with mathematics and started getting involved in more and more math competitions.
Now I am fascinated about learning mathematics. Read the proof of the Pythagorean or Thales Theorem, is simply so satisfying see how they solved these problems in such a creative way. And that is the purpose of math: turn a very difficult problem into an easy one with a simple and understandable solution. I have learned too many theorems, formulas and equations during the time I have participated in math Olympiads, that it has functioned in me as a drug, the more I learn about math the less I realize I know and it pushes me to keep learning. From Calculus, I have learned that math has too many applications in the real world, like how to optimize the amount of material used for contain a specific volume.
Besides the applications of math, I like to solve problems that I know won't serve to the world, I do it just for the pleasure of being able to solve it and the excitement that provokes me. Mathematics means now for me a new form to see the world, I know that the solving problem ability that pushes my imagination to its limits will help me to solve any kind of problem in my life.
Holt Educational Consultant - / 14,835 
4783 Antonio, in my opinion, the essay will work best if you remove the reference to the way that you were taught math at school which led to your boredom. Specifically, I would like to have you consider removing what you currently have as the opening statement. That is the portion that really does not help because it sounds like you are complaining about the Mathematical teaching method in school when you were younger. Let's not make any reference to age whatsoever in the essay so that you will come across as a well rounded and informed student applicant instead. Your opening sentence in your current second paragraph would really work well in enticing the reviewer to read your essay when compared to the current opening. Try it yourself. Read the essay in its original form, then remove the current opening paragraph, I bet you will spot the immediate difference.
The part that opens with "That was Six year ago" should instead open with "Six years ago, my school was invited..." Opening the paragraph that way makes the intention of the paragraph clearer to the reader. The rest of the paragraphs from that point have been developed well, as far as I am concerned.
Now, I found myself wondering if you are applying to become a Math major in college? If you are, then maybe you should consider using a different topic for this essay. The prompt is normally used to allow the student to show a more relaxed side of himself outside of his academic interests. Something that the other common app prompts did not allow you present because those were focused on discussing your chosen university or major. Consider changing your topic if I guessed right and you are a Math major. If you are not, then the changes I suggested ought to work find for your purposes.
