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Who Am I?The most basic question, but I'm never able to answer!



tish1396 1 / 2  
Jun 9, 2013   #1
Hello!! The assignment was to write an essay on who you are. I never thought it would be so difficult!! Please help me edit this essay. Thanks!!

Who am I? The most basic question of my being that I am never able to answer. I can contemplate on this seemingly simple question for years without establishing who I am as a person and my purpose here on earth. After much soul-searching, there is one thing I know for certain; my experiences have made a big impact in who I am to become. I will start off with my name, ( Insert name) . Try saying that seven times fast! I was born on a chilly day on April 4th to two of the most incredibly hard working and loving people I know. Although my mom and dad were crossing their fingers for a boy, they were completely thrilled to add another beautiful baby girl to their young family. My mom and dad are some of the most incredible parents I know. They have the ability to support me wholeheartedly in whatever my endeavors may be. They love me to death and play a huge role in making me the mature, loving, and respectful 17 year old I am today.

My early years were spent with my two younger cousins making mud pies, playing hide-and-seek, and getting into as much mischief as our little hands could handle. The countless days at my grandma's house spent eating her world famous tortillas and listening to her soft voice as she laid me down for a nap gave me the realization that I was incredibly fortunate to have a strong and loving women in my life to which I could look up to. As school days came around, I quickly realized my love of learning. When new subjects were presented in school, I would yearn to learn more. I could not get my mind off that particular subject until all of my questions were answered. Now in high school, I am the girl who sits in the front row eager to learn. Much of my focus is centered around school rather than on high school relationships and drama.

I am an introvert who would rather stay home and watch romantic comedies than go out to a party. I am a vegetarian health nut who tries not to eat anything with ingredients I can't pronounce. I am a lover of all things polka dotted or striped. I am a procrastinator who gets things done at the eleventh hour. I am a leader who will stand up for the kid being picked on in class. I am a shoulder to cry on when times get rough. I am still in search of my purpose here on earth and struggle pinpointing who I am as a person. I can only say for sure that I hope to one day find a place in this crazy world where I not only fit in, but discover who I am destined to be.

jkjeremy - / 380  
Jun 9, 2013   #2
This paper has its moments (including some clever and witty ones) but it soon deteriorates into a list of "I am..." sentences.

What traits do YOU have that no one else does?

That's the hard part.

Pick three experiences unique to you and tell me how those experiences shaped you.
OP tish1396 1 / 2  
Jun 9, 2013   #3
Thanks so much!! That really helped!!
jkjeremy - / 380  
Jun 9, 2013   #4
Glad to hear it.

Keep in mind that there are other issues to which you must attend, but content is always most important.
dumi 1 / 6793  
Jun 27, 2013   #5
I can contemplate on this seemingly simple question for years without establishing who I am as a person and my purpose here on earth.

... in the first line you said it is the most basic question and therefore this sounds repetitive. Without that part, it sounds better.

my experiences have made a big impact inon who I am to become

.... my experiences have made a big impact on shaping my character and personality.

My mom and dad are some of the most incredible parents I know.

... this you said in your earlier sentence and hence this one becomes redundant.

They love me to death and play a huge role in making me the mature, loving, and respectful 17 year old I am today .

They love me so deeply and has played and still play a huge role in molding me into a mature, loving and respectful seventeen year old.

I love your unique style of writing. It's very well presented and you seem to be very creative :)
OP tish1396 1 / 2  
Jul 7, 2013   #6
Thank you very much!! Your corrections really helped!


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