Unanswered [5]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 3


Toefl essay which changed people's lives automobiles bicycles airplanes



rmli 7 / 10  
Nov 18, 2009   #1
hi my friends,
Another essay,Againe I hope you can help to make it better.
Thanks in advance.
Ruoming

Choose one of the following transportation vehicles and explain why
you think it has changed people's lives.
- automobiles
- bicycles
- airplanes
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.


Although new invention will changed the world more or less, only a few inventions can take the significant change to the ordinary people. The automobiles were one. The automobiles had improved our travelling ability, and such changed is not only in the travelling but also in living.

The speed and range which was provided by automobile has facilitated the transport and travelling. One can live in the nearby countryside which has better living condition, and go to work by bus or car. The fresh food such as fresh milk can be delivery farer, thus it provide the benefit to both the farmer and custom. Furthermore, the automobile can be designed to special application, thus brought daily life great advantage as well as change. For example the ambulance was designed for saving the life, it help patient to survive from acute disease or accident while it contributed to shape up the modern emergency treatment system.

Beside the directly changed, the automobile has also changed the human society indirectly. The wildly distributed gas station and well developed high way system were good examples. Furthermore, the blooming of the vehicle manufacture industry had stimulated the related industry, such as iron and steel industry, and petroleum industry; the raising industries stimulate the development of corresponding techniques. As a result, new towns roused in the place where resource was found; new plant was set up; new technologies were developed.

The change which taken by the automobile are not all positive. The traffic accidents can bring more seriously damage than former vehicle, and unfortunately, accompany by the Sales Volume increasing the automobile vehicles the number and rate of such accident were increased. Another example of the negative change was the greenhouse effect.

All above, demonstrated the change brought by the automobile were profound.

Poojasugandhi 18 / 34  
Nov 18, 2009   #2
Hi,
good work its seem that you are using correct format of toefl essay.
Include above reasons in conclusion para .
Jin 11 / 37  
Nov 18, 2009   #3
Although new invention will changed the world more or less, only a few inventions can take the significant change to the ordinary people. The automobiles (is one type) The automobiles had improved our travelling ability,(abilities) not only in travelling but also in living.

The speed and range which are provided by automobile have facilitated the transport and travelling. One can live in the nearby countryside which has better living condition, and go to work by bus or car. The fresh food such as milk(milk is not food) can be delivery farer, thus it provides the benefit to both the farmer and customers. Furthermore, the automobile can also applied in daily life, which has a great advantage For example the ambulances designed for saving life help patient to survive from acute disease or accident while it contributed to shape up the modern emergency treatment system.

hope it hleps~~


Home / Writing Feedback / Toefl essay which changed people's lives automobiles bicycles airplanes
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳