The common silkworm's life cycle and how silk cloth is harvested from them

The diagram process illustrates the silkworm life cycle and the methods of producing silk cloth. Overall, there are 4 steps from mooth become cocoon or the main ingredient of silk cloth while it needs 5 steps to make silk cloth.

To begin with, the first step eggs are produced by mooth and it happens in the mulberry leaves, after ten days the silkworms are born from the egg. The silkworms will eat the mulberry leaves as their food. About 4-6 weeks later, the silkworm alter into silk thread. The last cocoon is shaped after 3-8 days from silk thread. The main ingredient to make silk cloth is cocoon. If the cocoon are not used to make silk cloth, it will change again to mooth after 16 days.

The second process is how to make silk cloth. The first thing people should do is selecting the cocoon. After that, put cocoon into the water and boil it. The next process is unwind the cocoon in 300-900 m high. After it twist, put into the water to make it softer, then weave it. Finally, the silk cloth is ready to be shaped.

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  Life Cycle of silkworms
  

Introduction could use a rework.

Adding a few words can make a huge improvement.
The diagram process illustrates the common silkworm's life cycle and how silk cloth is harvested from them.Overall there are 4 main stages for a silkworm:[Insert 4 stages ex: larvae , pupae].The silk harvesting begins in the cocoon stage and the harvested silk strands are turned into cloth.

The most advanced form of metamorphosis is presented in this diagram. There are four stages of a life cycle of a silkworm broken down . The life cycle ends with cocoon and continues to grow into an adult moth over the following days after being started in eggs.


A very good essay always avoids generic phrases.


You can use transforms or metamorphoses

Well, you need much help, English prof.
The best approach to tackle grammar issues is to read sample answers as many as you can. Not only this, such a way improves your vocabulary and ideas related to IELTS essay.

Hope this helps :D
a heap of luck

Hi Farida, I have been an avid reviewer of your work, wether it is an analysis, an essay, argumentative or not and pretty much all other work that you have is definitely a good practice to hone your talents in writing. It is also a great way to try different writing techniques and different tactics to approach the essay.

Overall, this analysis has been an accurate one, I must say as I go along, I compare your analysis to the diagram and I must say that it is properly analyzed and the minor points in the diagram are elaborated in the analysis.

Moreover, the steps or the process of the silk cloth has been clearly depicted in this analysis, it showed a very smooth process that a normal reader will be able to follow through, However, as mentioned by other contributors, this analysis can still be enhanced with the help of a few change in the words and make it more formal, but I believe in simplicity of writing, especially when it comes to an analysis of a given diagram.