Some question is very difficult to me, but i try my best to produce one clearly and logically.
Can you help me revise this essay? I really need feedback tom improve my writing skill a lot.
Thank you
What is the most important animal in your country? Why is the animal important? Use specific reasons and details to explain your answer.
In my opinion, an elephant is an important animal in my country, Thailand. It has been used in many ways like a vehicle for King, one for trading and an attractive animal performance. There are three reasons why I think an elephant is the most popular in Thailand.
First, in the past, King Phumiphon always rode an elephant not only for battle but for sightseeing. There were wars between Thai and Burma and a lot of high-ranking soldiers and King had to use an elephant as a good carrier both for warfare and tourism. An elephant has many qualities such as strength and bravery. For example, it can go through wetlands or muddy areas without being bogged down in it and travel to forests. Another is that it can boldly fight with enemies during the war, resulting in many victories.
Second, we could carry a lot of goods by elephants.
About two centuries ago, there was no lorry for transportation of things like logs and raw materials for trade exchange in cities. Although we could use other animals for this task, no one is as convenient as an elephant because it was able to bring a lot of things from a village to a city through rough and bumpy route effectively. Even though, Cattle were one which can transport goods, but it was not convenient for long distances
Third, everybody is very excited and interested to attend the elephant football game.
In Thailand, every year, a lot of people from around the globe come to watch this sport and many teams join the competition for The King's Title. There are several appealing aspects of this tournament; for instance, people who participate have to be careful with their movement because if not, they will fall to the ground and get injuries. Moreover, they have to use a skill of controlling a ball from Hockey to score a goal.
In summary, an elephant has a great number of benefits not only for military but also for business. Couple of centuries ago, there was not any vehicle for troops in the war than an elephant and it was very difficult for dealers to transport goods from one place to another without although cattle are useful too. Finally, a lot of children can enjoy the sport game during a holiday.
Can you help me revise this essay? I really need feedback tom improve my writing skill a lot.
Thank you
What is the most important animal in your country? Why is the animal important? Use specific reasons and details to explain your answer.
In my opinion, an elephant is an important animal in my country, Thailand. It has been used in many ways like a vehicle for King, one for trading and an attractive animal performance. There are three reasons why I think an elephant is the most popular in Thailand.
First, in the past, King Phumiphon always rode an elephant not only for battle but for sightseeing. There were wars between Thai and Burma and a lot of high-ranking soldiers and King had to use an elephant as a good carrier both for warfare and tourism. An elephant has many qualities such as strength and bravery. For example, it can go through wetlands or muddy areas without being bogged down in it and travel to forests. Another is that it can boldly fight with enemies during the war, resulting in many victories.
Second, we could carry a lot of goods by elephants.
About two centuries ago, there was no lorry for transportation of things like logs and raw materials for trade exchange in cities. Although we could use other animals for this task, no one is as convenient as an elephant because it was able to bring a lot of things from a village to a city through rough and bumpy route effectively. Even though, Cattle were one which can transport goods, but it was not convenient for long distances
Third, everybody is very excited and interested to attend the elephant football game.
In Thailand, every year, a lot of people from around the globe come to watch this sport and many teams join the competition for The King's Title. There are several appealing aspects of this tournament; for instance, people who participate have to be careful with their movement because if not, they will fall to the ground and get injuries. Moreover, they have to use a skill of controlling a ball from Hockey to score a goal.
In summary, an elephant has a great number of benefits not only for military but also for business. Couple of centuries ago, there was not any vehicle for troops in the war than an elephant and it was very difficult for dealers to transport goods from one place to another without although cattle are useful too. Finally, a lot of children can enjoy the sport game during a holiday.
