To what extent art subjects should be remarked in academia?

Ielts academic task 2 - art topic

Some people think that art is an essential subject for children at school while others think it is a waste of time
Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

The highly controversial topic in terms of education currently relates to what extent art subjects should be remarked in academia. one commonly held idea advocates the obligation of these particular disciplines, while many consider core subjects to be more important. in this essay, i am going to shed some light on the question from both points of view and then give my own opinion on the matter.

Firstly and most obviously, integrating arts with other subjects can significantly help raise achievement levels. That is these classes enable students to develop greater perspective as well as creativity before accelerating problem-solving skills linked to improved literacy or even numeracy abilities. for those who are academically weaker, inventive classes may correspondingly serve as alternative learning pathways. In point of fact, countless surveys sing the praises of excellent performances in non-art subjects, like english and maths when it comes to the merits of being accessed to these artistic basement. Then again, mandatory art lessons are without doubt advantageous to pupils in the long term.

nevertheless, the side aspect that should not be overlooked is that advancements from graphic disciplines are usually lost by artistically incompetent individuals. will they be implemented compulsory for all schools, many half-hearted may see them as a chore due to the indifference to art and culture in the first place. Subsequently, no sooner had the bare minimum simply been made in order to gain a pass than apathetic people spend the remaining time chattering away with peers. while some will probably not get enough credits in those excessive schoolwork rather than reaping any useful knowledge.

taking everything into consideration, allowing students to experience alternations is a wise move as non-academic understanding might inspire them to properly utilise their time and the school's resources. In the same fashion, those electives should be treated more as extra curricular and be going on after school. as a result, an interesting and less distracting environment is able to approach a noteworthy concentration on schoolwork and of course superior academic performance.

In conclusion, it is high time for institutions to introduce flexible programs with a bunch of diverse majorings that adapt each extraordinary talent.

I think some phrases you used are a little informal: "a bunch of", "shed some light on" or "half-hearted"

Avoid making exaggerated claims in your prompt paraphrase. The examiners view these sensationalist exaggerations as misleading information that is never included in the original prompt reference. I understand that you want to make an exciting restatement of the prompt, but misleading the reader is not the way to do it. You are scored on your restatement accuracy so these over the top claims ( highly controversial topic) does more harm than good to your TA score. Although you had a good reference to the discussion method required, the hyperbolic claim is what will lower your TA score.

You must stop making distorted claims (most obviously) in your essay. Specially in your reasoning paragraph. While fake news may the latest trend in journalistic writing, it will not help you when writing an academic paper. You are using a trigger tone, rather than an academic tone in your writing. The latter is what you are aiming for, the former, is what will irritate the examiner enough to make you fail the test.

You are careless in your writing. Note that you do not start the first word of every paragraph with a capital letter, which is one of the basic tenets of English writing. You will definitely receive a failing GA score because of this lack of attention to details in your writing. I do not even think you are trying to pass the test at this point. You have done the exact opposite, in this presentation, that an exam taker would be doing if he wanted to pass the test.

Hi, I found some mistakes in your essay, be more careful!
- to these artistic basements.
- extracurricular
Hope my suggestions useful!