Unanswered [3]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


IELTS task 1 - the funding and spending activities of USA charity in a year



M3L1 26 / 6  
Nov 9, 2015   #1
These two pie charts compare the income fund and spending activities of USA charity in a year. In general, the first chart shows that the highest revenue is denoted by donated foods while the largest percentages of expenses allocated in program services.

In a year, people in USA contributed most in charity by donated food, it take rates of 86.6%. The other sponsorship is from community contribution which take the second highest rate in 10.4%. Program revenue has assembled fund in about 2.2%, while investment income, government grants and other income indicators only collect a little amount of money less than one percent.

USA used most of the sources to financed the program services, it cost 95.8% in total expenses. To gain more revenue, they did fundraising program which used 2.6% of the money. Finally the expended to management and general activities just solely used the less fund. Overall, the sum of income has gained profit in about $336,684 depleted by the expenditures.


  • ES7.png


shintacandrade 10 / 66  
Nov 10, 2015   #2
These two pie charts compare the income fund and spending activities of USA charity in a year.

Better you write the units of measurement in the introductory paragraph. Let me give a try:
The pie charts compare the percentage of revenue and expenses over a year of charity in the USA.

In general, the first chart shows that the highest revenue is denoted by donated foods while the second chart describes the largest percentages of expenses allocated in program services.

Here, I add some words to make your writing clear. Since you have written 'the first chart' in the beginning, I do so by adding 'the second chart' for comparing the data you want to describe. This is my alternative overview:

Overall, it can be seen that donated food accounted for the highest revenue while program services calculated as the most expense. Furthermore, total revenue sources are adequate to cover the expenditures in one year.


Hope this helps ~ Shinta


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS task 1 - the funding and spending activities of USA charity in a year
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳