The line graph compares the various needs of fish and three types of meat in the European Union over the period of 25 years.
It is clear that the consumption of chicken rose significantly while the amount of fish experienced a minor change. Consumption of two types of meat, consisting beef and lamb decrease steadily from 1979 to 2004.
In 1979, beef was the biggest consumption which consumed about 220 grams per person per week. At the same time, the intake of chicken and lamp was around 150 grams per week and fish consumption was only 60 grams per week by each person. From 1979 to 1989, the rate of fish intake remained relatively stable, but the amount of three types of meat consuming weekly fluctuated.
By 2004, the consumption of chicken was highest at around 250 grams per person weekly, compared to about 120 grams of beef, 60 grams of lamb and only 40 grams of fish.
Tan, your essay falls short of the minimum 3 sentence overview summary in the first paragraph. It also comprises only one paragraph at the moment when the expected number of paragraphs ranges from 3 to 5. You also lack a proper conclusion for your essay. You have to revise the essay to reflect the standard criteria in order to even get this to qualify as a standard essay. At this point, the essay does not pass the most important criteria in the grading rubic and will not get a good grade.
Aside from that, you did not provide us with the copy of the image that this report is based upon. We cannot confirm if you provided the correct information in your essay without it. The point of comparison is really important to us. So please upload the image soon. In the meantime, here is a simple grammar review of your essay. I separated it into potential new paragraphs for you to follow in your revision.
The line graph compares the various needs of FOR fish and three types of meat in the European Union over the A period of 25 years.
It is clear that the consumption of chicken rose significantly while the amount of fish experienced a minor change. Consumption of two types of meat, consisting beef and lamb decreaseD steadily from 1979 to 2004.
In 1979, beef was the biggest consumption which WAS consumed AT about 220 grams per person per week. At the same time, the intake of chicken and lamp LAMB was around 150 grams per week and fish consumption was only 60 grams per week by each PER person. From 1979 to 1989, the rate of fish intake remained relatively stable, but the amount of INTAKE FOR THE three types of meat consuming CONSUMED weekly fluctuated.By 2004, the consumption of chicken was highest at around 250 grams per person weekly, compared to about 120 grams of beef, 60 grams of lamb and only 40 grams of fish.
thank you so much Vangiespen, Could you give me some mistakes of this essay?
topic: Some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime. Others, however, argue that the circumstances of an individual crime, and the motivation for committing it, should always be taken into account when deciding on the punishment. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
People have different view about whether punishments for crimes should be fixed. Although there are some advantages of fixed punishment, I believe that it is better to judge each crime individually.
There are some good arguments for having one set punishment for each crime. Firstly, it is easy to make a fair justice system. For instance, death penalty also called capital punishment for corruptors in Indonesia and only death punishment has to prevent the crime rates in community. Secondly, everyone is aware of the punishment for each crime that could deter the number of offenders in their own country over decades.
However, I would argue that the circumstances of a crime and the criminal's motivation should have an influence on the punishment. Stealing for profit in comparison with stealing to feed family is differently responsible for acting. For example, the first group has bad characteristics such as laziness or selfishness that could also breed future offenders who steal for profit. Others choose as thieves, instead of working hard to make an honest living. All situations should be judged following the legal system. Another case is that people do not have enough money to make ends meet, they will be tempted to purse illegal activities just to support themselves and their families. In this case, each crime individually should be considered to reducing punishment.
In conclusion, while a number of people think that each type of crime should be fixed punishment, I would argue that they should be judged taking both the circumstances and motivation account.
