Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 3


Increasing petrol prices- immediate solution, but temporary!



mahgh123 5 / 14  
Jul 17, 2013   #1
Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
What other measures do you think might be effective?

As regards increasing population, we are facing the new problems such as growing traffic and pollution. The way which is suggested to control of those problems is increasing petrol price. In this essay I will describe some cause and effect which is effective or ineffective. Ultimately I suggest another possible new way.

Not only population increase every day, but also our construction of city is constant. It is natural that our roads and highways capacity cannot tolerate commute masses of people. So it would better to change roads and highways based upon increasing population mutually. Also, describing traffic zone and updating traffic route tables according to daily needs may control roads and highways traffic. These solutions will be useful in all cars based on technology, highway police groups, or some private companies which are responsible for transporting people.

On the other hand, mass media maybe change people's mind not commuting in rush hours. In addition, they can affect commuter folk who will produce a huge amount of pollution that cars exude. If they know that this pollution is harmful for their health, they will collaborate each other to decrease the enormous amount of pollution.

Additionally, the next generation of cars which produce no pollution and work with green fuel may decline pollution. Moreover, sky train, fly cars and even private plane which work with green fuel may decrease traffic and pollution as the same.

To conclude, increasing petrol maybe the first and temporary way to decrease traffic and pollution. All people have to do their necessary needs in society every day, so it is thought that is not the best way. (271 words)

nancy07 3 / 5  
Jul 18, 2013   #2
i dont know exactly whether my corrects are right or wrong, but i hope they are useful.

Not only population increases every day

So it would be better to upgrade roads and highways based upon increasing population mutually >>>> We should replace Therefore instead of So, my lecture told me that "So" should not be put at the head of sentence in writing, and it is also informal.

I found some errors but i didn't know how to correct. I'm so sorry, I hope somebody can help you soon.
dumi 1 / 6793  
Jul 20, 2013   #3
As regards increasing population, we are facing the new problems such as growing traffic and pollution.

As a result of increasing population and development of transportation technologies, the world today is faced with new problems such as growing traffic and pollution.

In this essay I will describe some cause and effect which is effective or ineffective. Ultimately I suggest another possible new way.

It is better you state your position here without keeping the reader in a sort of vague mood. This type of sentences really do not help you impress the reader.


Home / Writing Feedback / Increasing petrol prices- immediate solution, but temporary!
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳