Unanswered [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


The map below is the town of Garlsdon. A new supermarket (S) is planned for the town. (cam 5 test 1)



Nekoan 1 / -  
Jun 1, 2020   #1

Garlsdon town map essay



The map below illustrates for us about the town of Garlsdon. A novel supermarket (S) is planned for the town. The map also gives us two possible areas for the supermarket.

As we can see, there are two place that is mentioned in the map. First area is countryside and the other is in town centre without traffic zone.

In the first site, we can see the square of this zone is as big as second zone is. However, there are many benefits for the supermarket when they palace it in this area. For example, it is close to both railway and main roads that people do not have to walk for a long distance

Although people in Garlsdon have to walk more than they do in the first site, it is more convenient for dwellers who live in Bransdon, Cransdon and people who are living in town centre because they do not have to move for a longer distance.

In conclusion, both areas has its own benefits and cons. So I think that both are able to be chosen as the place to build new supermarket.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15466  
Jun 2, 2020   #2
Where is the copy of the image? You have to provide a copy of the image if you wish to receive a complete review of your work. I need the image so I can compare the content of what you wrote with the image provided. I also need that to be sure that you followed the discussion instructions. Without it, I can only give you a general, non-specific review of your work.

This is not an opinion essay. It is a reporting essay. You must never provide an opinion in a task 1 essay. This is only a summary of information essay. It is not an academic discussion essay. It would be best for you to avoid doing that moving forward.

You speak only of the location in the report. You do not mention any changes, improvements, or additions to the new site. Since I cannot see the image for myself, I cannot comment on what information you should have provided. I would like to remind you that the assumption of this essay is that the reader does not have a copy of the image to look at. So you should be highly specific and informative about the content of the image within the report. As it is, this report is useless because it does not provide necessary information to the reader beyond a comparative discussion, which is not the focal point of the task 1 essay. The target of this essay is to see how well developed your descriptive skills are in terms of a written report based on a visual source.

By the way, a palace is defined as: the official residence of a king, queen, bishop, or other sovereign or exalted personage; a large and stately mansion or building. You were not implying anything of the sort. Your word usage was incorrect. You mean to refer to a place which is: a particular portion of space. Such errors in word usage and vocabulary will negatively affect your LR score.

The other errors in this presentation are not valid for review because those apply to a task 2 essay, which, as I mentioned earlier, is not the format for this essay type. Just know that based on your generalized presentation, it will be difficult for you to achieve a passing score. Note that I have not even considered the actual image information at this point. You obviously are not familiar with the requirements of writing a task 1 essay which are:

- To summarize the content
- To list the information
- Do a comparative report based on several factors that indicate a given measurement data
- Present a trending measurement or indicator


Home / Writing Feedback / The map below is the town of Garlsdon. A new supermarket (S) is planned for the town. (cam 5 test 1)
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳