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Women Should not Choose Abortion Persuasive Paragraph



ironhawk893 6 / 15  
Feb 21, 2011   #1
Hi I am looking for some help here this is my last paragraph i need to do for my writing workshop. It is a persuasive type paragraph and has to be 12 to 15 sentences in length. Please let me know how it is and if i have all the punctuations and such in place or if you have a better idea to throw into it. Thanks for your help it is very appreciated.

P.S. not trying to offend anyone with the topic here it's just a school project everyone is entitled to their own opinions.

Women Should not Choose Abortion

Because of the risks involved, women should not choose abortion to terminate their pregnancy. This is a life changing event with significant physical and emotional consequences of which most women do not realize until after the procedure has been performed. First of all, there are many immediate complications, which can occur during the procedure, the most common being perforation of the uterus, cervical injury, infection, and retained tissue. According to the American Journal of Obs/Gyn, since these injuries will usually go undiagnosed there is a 25% increased risk of problems with future pregnancies such as miscarriage, premature delivery, and rupture of the placenta to name a few. Secondly, the elevated risk of breast, cervical, and ovarian cancer. The Journal of National Cancer Institude reports that a womans risk of breast cancer increases by 30% after abortion, 90% if performed after 18 weeks of pregnancy and 150% if the woman is under age 18. Finally, and most importantly, is the emotional and psychological impact. Many woman after the abortion experience initial relief, the crisis is over and life returns to normal, however according to the Canadian Health and Canadian Medical Associations the crisis is not over, in fact it has just begun. Months even years later significant problems like clinical depression, drug and alcohol abuse, even suicide can occur due to the guilt, grief, and anger felt. Most women who have experienced abortion find it difficult to bond with a partner and other children afterwards, they say that they wish they had knowing all the facts before the procedure and regretted their decision to abort.

EF_Kevin 8 / 13053  
Feb 24, 2011   #2
The last sentence of your essay expresses a statistical fact.. so you should cite the source. Oh, nevermind, I see that you already did credit the source... I think you did a great job, and it is so interesting that you made all the arguments that are not about morality. You made a lot of practical arguments. This is a very uniquely valuable essay because of that approach you took.

One way that abortionists have avoided the perforation you mentioned is to do a "partial birth" abortion. They start to bring the baby out feet first, and then they stab it in the base of the skull and scramble the brains. I am not making that up! That was the real procedure.
OP ironhawk893 6 / 15  
Feb 24, 2011   #3
Wow did not know about that last statement pretty harsh. Thanks for the feedback it's appreciated.


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