"When it comes to public health.." SOP for a master in health management and policies

The prompt is to write a statement of purpose (SOP) for about one to two pages long. The SOP will be addressed to a school of public health.

When it comes to public health, every body has his small story to tell. I am a survivor from a place where the life of my mother in delivery and I critically depended on the bicycle nearby to drive us to the nearest health center located 13 miles away. Public health problems such as HIV, lack of health infrastructure and professionals, malnutrition, unsafe water, malaria, tuberculosis surrounded me for 13 long years. Since the end of high school, I have made a resolution to assign my studies not only to make my living needs but also to dwindle the occurrence of such situation. After digging into the health fields, I realize that the implementation of an efficient health policy is the key solution. University...with its distinctive stamp, totally fit with my project.

Being a pharmacist has been an everlasting and valuable background to pursue this purpose but the more I practice, the more I realize that cost- effective solutions performed upstream could save more lives than treatments do. For instance, while working for ****, a pharmaceutical distributor company in ***, I participated in an action of donation to a starving population in Zinder and Maradi. It was heart breaking to see children weighting barely five pounds, just because resources and decisions have been managed in an inefficient and ineffective way. After, I managed a pharmacy in a rural area in ****, working with association of people living with HIV. For more than one year the whole country was in lack of antiretroviral drugs, just because the follow up process of the project was missed and funders decided to temporarily stop financing. I felt the insufficiencies in management with a great deal of sorrow because we lost a lot of lives from there.

Unlike my African experiences, public health issues I dealt with in U.S. concerned prescription drug coverage but still exhibit the relevance of an adequate health policy. In fact, working at CVS pharmacy gave me an overview of the complexity of Medicare, Medicaid issues, and insurance plans. These critical components of U.S. health system revealed to me the challenge of designing a perfect U.S. health care system. Overall, the international experience made me understand more the influence of economic and cultural differences on health. I believe the mastery of economic and cultural realities are critical to build an efficient policy in an area.

Once I am accepted into the graduate program, I will focus on economic, program planning development and management principles to perform health policy analysis. Professor***, talked to me about the connection of the department with organizations that address critical public health needs and the extension of the program to global health issues. I highly consider the partnership of the school with some universities in Africa. The cultural diversity of your students is for me a nurturing environment to enhance my future.

I picture myself in seven years as a university teacher with a PhD diploma in health policy. I will transmit my understanding of health policies to students who will in turn impact the access to health to individuals in the world. Further, I see myself owning a contractor company, an intermediate between not- for- profit organization and developing countries in Africa. Still in touch with my original school of public health, I will bring up the reality of global health issues. My strong knowledge in health policy will markedly serve developing countries designing efficient healthcare plan in order to touch as much population in need as I have ever dreamed. Profoundly confident in this project, I am already a member of collegiate entrepreneur organization (CEO), in which I am gradually strengthening my entrepreneurial skills.

My life experiences have called me to act in public health. My knowledge and experience in health, revealed to me the need to intensify my curiosity in health policy to move ahead. I effortlessly perceived that University of****with the osmotic change it has with public health organization will submerge my project to study, work, and ultimately, make a difference in public health field.

Dear David,

If possible please change the number 13 atleast in one position. It may be true, but it's sounding little bit artificial. I am suggesting few changes below, please consider it if you find any one of them appropriate.

After digging (working) into the health fields, I realize realized or have come to a realization that the implementation of an efficient health policy is the key solution.

Please don't use too many informal words. Try making the aforementioned sentence more formal.

Since the end of high school, I have made a resolution to assign my studies not only to make my living needs but also to dwindle the occurrence of such situation.

This sentence is having problem with diction. It looks like that you are taking resolution daily after your high school. I think, it will be better if you will use after in place of since.

I think you should elaborate little bit more on how your past experience fit to the program in which you are applying, and how it is going to help you in achieving your goal. In addition to this focus little bit more on what you would like to do there and what are the skills that you would like to acquire during this program or by the end of the program. While writing a SOP, please try to focus more on logos then pathos as a means of effective persuasion tool of writing. I can understand that emotions are very important, but I have done same mistake while writing my SOP a year back. So, you mention it but not in that much detail that it should cover all other aspect of your application.

I would like to read your SOP again. Please update me on my mail (rajesh_aaidu@yahoo.co.in)because I am not freqent user on essay forum.

Thanks

This thesis statement is not meaningful enough. It goes without saying that this university fits your needs, because you are applying. Use the sentence at the end of the first paragraph to tell the reader something that you want her/him to remember about you.

I think you should use that last sentence of the first paragraph to tell the reader about something you want to DO professionally or during your next few years in college. Tell about something specific you want to DO pertaining to public health. That way, the reader will know what you stand for.

This should be one word: heart breakin g heartbreaking

Suggestion: Move that conclusion to the top, so that it is part of the introduction. It makes a great thesis statement! Then, write a new conclusion to replace it. I think that conclusion is written very well.

:-)

in the first paragraph u say lack of health infrasture-i thnk paraphrasing that line would sound beta. And in the same paragraph u say 'make my living needs' u wud also do wel to paraphrase it. Otherwise it needs further refining