Hi,
Please have a look at my Letter of Motivation . The college only requires Tofel scores hence i have mentioned my GMAT scores in the letter itself.
The university requires applicants with strong maths background.
Please suggest improvements or changes.
Dear Sir or Madam
I wish to apply to the Master in Finance program at your university for the academic year 2011-2012. Having reviewed the course content, the University/ Course ratings, I am sure that the program will make me qualified to meet my future aspirations of becoming an exceptional financial consultant and the knowledge gained would pave way for my doctorate subsequently. Having spoken with current and ex - students of your university and other universities, I am confident that I am choosing the right university and the right course. With many distinguished professors at your esteemed educational institution and the importance given to research, I am sure that the coming two years would be a transforming experience for me.
I have always had a keen interest in Mathematics since childhood and have secured an A+ grade in all the mathematics courses during my graduation as well. Additional testimonial to this is my scoring a 49/51 (mapping to a worldwide percentile of 90%) in the quantitative section of the GMAT, taken this year. It is not only the subject alone but also its diverse application that interests me a lot. Because of this interest I took Six Sigma course and learned how statistical tools can be used in the area of quality management. Later I was able to apply these skills by participating in a project to design metric and evaluate customer satisfaction based on statistical model.
After graduating with a CGPA of 9.24/10 and being awarded the Vice Chancellors gold medal for topping my university, I have worked as an SAP analytics specialist for fortune 500 clients like XXX, XXX and XXX. I have continuously outperformed my peers and have received the "SAP Top-Talent" award for two consecutive years for outstanding work. In retrospect, it was while working on challenging requirements to model and deliver financial reporting solutions that I gained my interest in the area. Having worked on reporting requirements from areas such as financial accounting, budgeting, controlling, cash and liquidity management enabled me to build a strong foundation in financials. It was while designing profitability planning reports that I was faced with the most challenging scenario of consolidating data from other business areas with that of financials. The project not only enhanced my understating of interactions between business areas but also gave me new perspective at understanding the critical role financial tools can play in an organizations growth.
What started during my schooling as a hobby turned into a more serious interest later in my life. Volunteering my time as a trainer for knowledge sharing enabled me to interact with wide range of people, understand personalities and develop a sense of how to motivate others. Apart from being a member of student council during my graduation and receiving many certificates of appreciation from top-managing at SAP, during one program at SAP I received a rating of 6.55/7, which is one of the highest ever recorded ratings for a trainer.
Given my past history of commitment to excellence, I am confident that I will bring a high level of energy and enthusiasm to your program. I can assure to provide you with the top academic performance.
Thank you for considering my application, and I look forward to your acceptance.
Sincerely yours.
overall, I liked your motivation letter. But, it is so long. As for me, maximum 500 words are enough, but yours are surpassed. And instead of CGPA, use GPA :)
Let's use "former" instead of ex:
...current and former students of your university and other universities, I am...
confident that I am choosing the right university and the right course. With many distinguished professors at your esteemed educational institution and the importance given to research, I am sure that the coming two years would be a transforming experience for me. This first paragraph is too general. You should give a memorable theme... a concept that the reader will associate with you. What is the theme of this letter? You should make it distinct by adding a line or two at the end... show what is unique about your plan or about your way of thinking about it.
Given my past history of commitment to excellence, I am confident that I will bring a high level of energy and enthusiasm to your program. I can assure to provide you with the promise to demonstrate top academic performance.
This is so impressive! If you want to improve it, tell the reader about some specific intellectual goals. What will you read, what will you research, and what will you try to achieve during your first year in the program. Show how much thought you have put into this.
:-)
well i agree with Kevin, u just need to work on 1st para to make it in line with rest of the letter
Good luck :)
