During my adolescence, I had participated in a rally organized for raising awareness for heart disease. It was one of my first experiences getting involved in an awareness program. As soon as the event ended, I rushed home to handover the pamphlets to my grandfather. My grandpa was a chain smoker and I had been suggesting him to walk on a regular basis. So, I was extremely impatient to explain the harmful effects of active smoking to him. I had learnt about heart disease and how it can be prevented especially at an older age. With the help of the awareness program, I became aware that older people should walk and exercise regularly to enhance circulation of blood and to prevent blockage in the blood vessels. I believe I have been drawn towards health issues from the very beginning. I always had the deepest desire to help other people and I believed nothing is more comforting and relieving after getting cured from a disease and securing a sound mind and body. So, I aspired to become a doctor from a young age to help people get cured and provide relief from diseases. After I finished my high school, I was encouraged to matriculate in M.B.B.S degree.
While I was studying bachelor's degree in M.B.B.S, I have had the opportunity to gain knowledge of public health through attending teachings of epidemiology, biostatistics and prevention medicine. But not long ago, when Nepal was declared Polio free on March 27th 2014 by World Health Organization, it made me realize the significance of public health in promoting health. It was a great achievement for the nation and the people. Somehow it gave me feeling of joy and accomplishment because it has given people a new hope m that disease like polio can be prevented and eradicated with the right approach. This occasion has inspired and encouraged me to pursue a career in Public Health. I am aware that in my country, Nepal, the health care system is not well established yet and there is still a long way to go to achieve well established health care system . There is lack of proper accessibility and distribution of health care facilities throughout the whole nation. The distribution is largely centralized. Also existence of health inequities between the rich and the poor which includes gender discrimination is one of the major problems in my country. I have come to believe that public health plays a crucial role in development of health care system for every nation and especially a nation such as Nepal, where more than half of the population live in rural areas and do not have easy access to health care facilities. I want to gain knowledge and skills in public health in order to obtain comprehensive c understanding of current public health issues that can help me in making effort to improve access and distribution of proper health care facilities and services.
When I hear my people are dying due to diarrhea or jaundice, I feel really disheartened. The national health issues rising in my country is that most of the rural population has been suffering and dying of diseases which are in fact preventable and curable. This includes diseases such as diarrhea, tuberculosis, gastroenteritis, malnutrition, pneumonia, meningitis, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease and enteric fever. And another alarming situation developing in urban population is that medical condition of hypertension and hyperglycemia is increasing rapidly in number. The conditions are the most important preventable risk factor for premature deaths worldwide. At present, it has affected at least one person from every family. I have lost three of my close relatives who died premature deaths cause of disease that was preventable. This has drawn my interest grow in public health which focuses on prevention measures and control of disease. In near future I am anticipating to devote my work in coordinating, planning, implementing, upgrading and strengthening preventive intervention programs throughout the whole nation with the government, NGO's and INGO's in my country. Currently Nepal's Ministry of Health is working towards implementing national health insurance from 2017 which is a stepping stone towards progress. But whereas mental health in Nepal is much neglected than any other area in public health and lagging behind. People are indifferent about mental health and have negative attitude towards it. One of goals is to work towards promoting mental health issues in community through surveying and investing in people's approach.Raising awareness regarding this issue will be my initial step.
Generous help from foreign countries has been given to my country to tackle public health issues and international agencies, voluteers are making effort to bring changes but there is lack of Nepalese advanced trained skilled individuals who can lead in this field .With the success story of achieving one of the Polio free countries in South Asia and acknowledging the need of efficient manpower in public health field, I aspire to be a part of such success stories in Nepal's public health sector in future. And this is only possible through advanced studies and training. I believe pursuing Master of Public health is the ultimate pathway towards reaching my goals. I am confident that with the right education, l can contribute to bring about progress in the community and the nation and the world. I look forward for the great opportunity and privilege not only to enhance my knowledge but to receive quality advance education from world class teachers at this prestigious university.
Dear All, Please give suggestions and give your guidance for the correction.It's almost complete.Thank you so much.
My grandpa was a chain smoker, and I had been suggesting to him that he should walk on a regular basis. So, I was extremely impatiently explaining to him the harmful effects of active smoking.----------I made a lot of changes to this sentence that I think improve the English. There were a few grammar errors, and I also made a change to improve the style ('impatiently').
The last sentence of your first paragraph should be like the bull's-eye in the center of a target. The sentence at the end of the first paragraph is the local points for the entire essay. It tells the reader the main idea. The rest of the essay supports this single, important idea. So, I suggest reflecting on the meaning of this essay and digging up the most important idea. Express that idea and beautiful sentence, and paste the sentence at the end of the first paragraph.
It's also a good idea to go through the essay and trim away as much content as you can. Trim away any words that do not help accomplish the goal of the essay.
This has drawn my interest grow toward the field of public health, and I especially focus...
In the near future, I anticipate devoting my work to coordinating, planning, implementing, upgrading and ...
Your intentions for being a benefit to your society you are bold and admirable. :-)
Thank you Kevin for taking time to go through my essay. It was really helpful. I am working on it : )
I have made some corrections.This is my final essay.Please help to point out any missing.I would be happy to receive any kind of suggestions.
During my adolescence, I had participated in a rally organized for raising awareness for heart disease. It was one of my first experiences getting involved in an awareness program. As soon as the event ended, I rushed home to handover the pamphlets to my grandfather. My grandpa was a chain smoker and I had been suggesting him to quit smoking . So, I impatiently explained the harmful effects of active smoking to him and suggested to walk on a regular basis. I had learnt about heart disease and how it can be prevented especially at an older age. With the help of the awareness program, I became aware that older people should walk and exercise regularly to enhance circulation of blood and to prevent blockage in the blood vessels. I believe I have been drawn towards health issues from the very beginning. I always had the deepest desire to help other people and I believed nothing is more comforting and relieving after getting cured from a disease and securing a sound mind and body . So, I aspired to become a doctor from a young age to help people get cured and to provide relief from diseases . After I finished my high school, I decided to matriculate in M.B.B.S degree. This has led me to the pathway of health science as a professional ambition. Being medical student has helped me to get a better understanding of diseases and exposed me to new world of experiences. I seek to take my experiences to a whole new level from which not only me but everyone will benefit.
While I was studying bachelor's degree in M.B.B.S, I have had the opportunity to gain knowledge of public health through attending teachings of epidemiology, biostatistics and prevention medicine. But not long ago, when Nepal was declared Polio free on March 27th 2014 by World Health Organization, it made me realize the significance of public health in promoting health. It was a great achievement for the nation and the people. Somehow it gave me feeling of joy and accomplishment because this has given my people a new hope and confidence in health care system of Nepal that diseases as such can be prevented and eradicated. This occasion has inspired and encouraged me to pursue a career in Public Health. I am aware that in my country, Nepal, the health care system is not well established yet and there is still a long way to go to achieve well established health care system . There is lack of proper access and distribution of health care facilities throughout the whole nation. The distribution is largely centralized. Also existence of health inequities between the rich and the poor which includes gender discrimination is one of the major problems in my country. I have come to believe that public health plays a crucial role in development of health care system for every nation and especially a nation such as Nepal, where more than half of the population live in rural areas and do not have easy access to health care facilities. I want to gain knowledge and skills in public health in order to obtain c thorough understanding of current public health problems that can help me in contribution to improve access and distribution of proper health care facilities and services.
It is heartbreaking to hear that people are dying due to diarrhea, jaundice and similar other diseases in the 21st century. The national health issue risings in my country is that most of the rural population has been suffering and are dying of diseases which are in fact preventable and curable. This includes diseases such as diarrhea, tuberculosis, gastroenteritis, malnutrition, pneumonia, meningitis, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease and enteric fever. Another alarming situation developing in urban population is the medical condition of hypertension and hyperglycemia. It is increasing rapidly in number. The risk factors related to these conditions are easily preventable, yet whichit is responsible for majority premature deaths worldwide. It has affected at least one member in each family. I have lost three of my close relatives who died premature deaths being the victims of preventable diseases. This has drawn my interest to grow towards public health and I especially want to which focuses on prevention measures , monitoring and control of preventable and communicable diseases. In near future, I foresee myself devoting in coordinating, planning, implementing, upgrading and strengthening preventive intervention programs throughout the whole nation with the government, NGO's and INGO's in my country. Nepal's Ministry of Health is currently working towards implementing national health insurance from 2017 which is a stepping stone towards progress. Whereas, mental health in Nepal is much neglected than any other area in public health and is lagging behind the rest. People are indifferent to mental health issues and have conservative thoughts towards it. One of my goals is to change people's approach in communities. I want to promote mental health, raise awareness and raise funds to build mental health care facilities. I am hopeful that there will be more than one mental health hospital in Nepal. I want work in strengthening health policies which protects every individual right regardless of their mental or physical state or gender or capacity or position towards health services.
Generous help from foreign countries has been given to Nepal to tackle public health issues and international volunteers are making effort to bring changes but there is lack of skilled Nepalese individuals who can lead in this field . Acknowledging the need of efficient manpower in public health field, I aspire to become expertise in Nepal's public health sector in future . I want to be a part of success stories like the polio free country. And this is only possible through advanced studies and skill training. I believe pursuing Master of Public health is the ultimate pathway towards reaching my goals. I am confident that with appropriate education, l can contribute to bring about progress in the community and the nation and the world. It is utmost privilege for me to enhance my knowledge in the field of my interest and to receive quality education from world class teachers at this prestigious university. I look forward for this great opportunity.
