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Personal Statement for Master Application at China University XJTU



Jadelim_99 1 / -  
Mar 7, 2024   #1
From an early age, I observed my father's unwavering dedication, as he would rise early and return late each day, diligently building his business from scratch. I also remember my mother tirelessly assisting him with bookkeeping late into the night. This memory inspired my personal goal: to enhance my father's business to preserve his legacy eventually.

Despite growing up poor and barely completed their high school education, my parents always believed that a combination of hard work, intelligence, and kindness leads to success. My father's relentless efforts provided our family with a comfortable life. This taught me that I can achieve things and change the lives around me as long as I am willing to learn and work hard for it. My mother's endless support and love for our family and unfortunate people have encouraged me to be kind and give back to society. These core values have become integral to my identity, shaping the person I am today.

In 2018, I embarked on a double undergraduate degree program in Multimedia Technology, concurrently studying at XXX University in Malaysia and XXX University in the UK. I was granted a partial scholarship throughout my 3 years of studying which eased the financial burden of my education. Driven by a desire to gain knowledge in various fields, I engaged in several part-time roles across IT Support and Business Development and Operations. Balancing multiple jobs with rigorous academic commitments was challenging. However, with unwavering persistence, I could adapt to the demanding schedule, grow to have disciplined time management,

adhere to strict schedules, and be able to prioritize effectively. My roles in IT support and Business Development and Operations involved direct engagement with students, lecturers, and clients. This hands-on experience proved crucial in enhancing my negotiation, critical thinking, and on-the-spot problem-solving abilities. Building on these experiences, my academic journey and diverse roles culminated in my Final Year Project (FYP), where I integrated Web Augmented Reality (WebAR) into a XXX website, enhancing interactivity and the e-commerce experience. This led me to choose a career as a product designer at XXX upon graduation.

As a product designer, I was involved in user research on the impact of human behavior on digital development and used that information to create a business solution through design. However, throughout my 21-month working period, I realized that I needed more knowledge of the business, its operation, and its management to design better solutions that meet the business goals and receive stakeholders' approval. Hence, I plan to apply to management programs such as Business Administration or Science & Engineering Management at Xi'an Jiaotong University (XJTU). I believe these programs not only bridge the gap and deepen my expertise in the business domain but also allow me to advance my career further into management or leadership roles.

The management programs at XJTU provide courses that cover operation management, business strategies, information management, data analytics, and many more that align with the required knowledge to realize my goal. Apart from that, there is a "1+1" training method which I believe can help me gain both theoretical knowledge and hands-on experience. Moreover, they are taught in English, making it easier for me to digest the information. Studying at XJTU excites me because the multicultural setting will broaden my horizons and improve my networking skills, while the local environment let me dive into the fascinating world of Chinese culture. Aside from the academic appeal, I discovered that XJTU offers various scholarships that reduce the financial burden and allow me to improve my knowledge for professional growth. Furthermore, China's high economic growth and expansion stand out as a promising location to pursue the master's program. The robust education system and cultural emphasis on diligence and perseverance created a competitive yet healthy academic environment that matches my desire for a challenging yet supportive learning

environment. Therefore, I believe that studying at XJTU is a great opportunity for me to study business knowledge in general, management in various domains, and applications in real-life scenarios.

I am proficient in three languages: Bahasa Indonesia, English, and Chinese. My language learning journey began at the age of 5, guided by my mother's strong belief in the benefits of multilingualism. I passed HSK level 2 in 2011 and obtained a band score of 7.5 on the IELTS test earlier this year (2023). Unfortunately, I had to discontinue my Chinese language studies when I relocated to Malaysia to pursue my degree. Nevertheless, my effort to learn Chinese does not stop. I continue to expand my proficiency through interactions with my Chinese Malaysian friends and colleagues, as well as by immersing myself in Chinese movies and television shows.

If granted admission and a scholarship to the university, I plan to broaden my horizons and work in a technology start-up that focuses on digital transformation in China. Once I have acquired sufficient experience and knowledge, I would like to return to my home country, Indonesia, and apply my expertise to enhance my father's business. The goal is to streamline processes and operations through technological solutions and expand the business's reach and impact. In the long term, my aspirations extend to establishing my own business once I have gathered enough knowledge and resources. I hope that I will be able to give back to society by spreading my knowledge and creating more job opportunities.

Perhaps witnessing my parents' relentless efforts to build their business has shaped me into a resilient, humble, and independent individual. I hope that with the knowledge gained, I will be able to help improve and expand my father's business and also create business solutions that can benefit others.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15458  
Mar 10, 2024   #2
I am confused. Are you applying for admission to the university? If so, then there should not be any mention of the scholarship request in the personal statement. The scholarship request should be addressed in a different and more appropriate essay. Reviewers who see pleadings for scholarships in the personal statement frown upon such practices and tend to ignore the applicant at that point.

Being a masters degree student means your personal statement should be based on more relevant and recent undertakings. It should not be referring to your biography stemming from childhood. You are losing focus. The reviewer will not pay much attention to the sob stories you are telling in your essay because those are childhood experiences that no longer have any bearing on who you are today. Go for more recent information about yourself. Discuss yourself as an adult, rather than going from childhood to adult and back.


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