I am applying for Master of Finance in Melbourne University.
Please help me to point out mistakes and weaknesses in my personal statement. Thank you so much.
Your application must include a personal statement of no more than 800 words. It should describe your personal motivation to undertake further study, and can include details of your personal circumstances as well as your life and work experiences. It should emphasise any aspect of your personal history that may enhance your application, including extracurricular activity, community involvement, work experience, relevant personal characteristics and any outstanding achievements.
Nowadays, the development of economies in finance area over the world requires a deeper professional knowledge as well as valuable practical experiences to find the best solutions to potential problems. After 4 years studying accounting and auditing in the university, I desired to take a further study in the finance area to widen my knowledge and provide me an insight into the financial operations of an economy in general and a business in particular. In addition, a master's degree in finance would provide me a solid foundation and promotions for my further career.
In the first academic year in university, I was one of the students who had the highest score in my in the university. My desire to pursue the further study in finance was sparked when I first studied the subject Corporate Finance in the third academic year. My lecturer was inspired me a lot through his lessons of financial analysis during this time. In my opinion, with the knowledge in accounting and auditing I have learnt in the university, a further study in Finance, which I believe, is going to be crucial in financial service industry. During my time at the university, I was also awarded a consolidation prize for my research in accounting and auditing field. Besides studying, I spent my time participating in other activities as well such as organizing Youth Union's events, charity works. As a result, the title "SVNT" was awarded to me as a proof for my contributions in 5 aspects: Academic accomplishment, Ethics, Physical fitness, Skills and Integration.
Now, I have been working in an audit firm for 7 months since I graduated from the university. In this period of time, I have applied theoretical knowledge that I was learnt in university into reality; it helps me understand clearly about the financial statements and components of these reports. Moreover, I also believe that working in an audit firm is a great chance for me to contact, share ideas and experiences about accounting, auditing and finance among professionals and finance enthusiasts. In my opinion, the time working here has a part in cherishing my desire to take a post graduate course in Finance.
A Master of Finance course in Melbourne University will provide me an opportunity to widen my knowledge in a dynamic and academic environment. Furthermore, studying in Australia is a chance for me not only to challenge myself by studying and living in a new country, but also to discover a new culture and to make friends with many people all around the world. I believe that invaluable knowledge and experiences studied from great professors in Melbourne University would be a stepping stone for my future life and career. I really appreciate your time considering my application and I hope that this information has depicted both my academic ability and personal motivation to take a further study in Finance.
Please help me to point out mistakes and weaknesses in my personal statement. Thank you so much.
Your application must include a personal statement of no more than 800 words. It should describe your personal motivation to undertake further study, and can include details of your personal circumstances as well as your life and work experiences. It should emphasise any aspect of your personal history that may enhance your application, including extracurricular activity, community involvement, work experience, relevant personal characteristics and any outstanding achievements.
Nowadays, the development of economies in finance area over the world requires a deeper professional knowledge as well as valuable practical experiences to find the best solutions to potential problems. After 4 years studying accounting and auditing in the university, I desired to take a further study in the finance area to widen my knowledge and provide me an insight into the financial operations of an economy in general and a business in particular. In addition, a master's degree in finance would provide me a solid foundation and promotions for my further career.
In the first academic year in university, I was one of the students who had the highest score in my in the university. My desire to pursue the further study in finance was sparked when I first studied the subject Corporate Finance in the third academic year. My lecturer was inspired me a lot through his lessons of financial analysis during this time. In my opinion, with the knowledge in accounting and auditing I have learnt in the university, a further study in Finance, which I believe, is going to be crucial in financial service industry. During my time at the university, I was also awarded a consolidation prize for my research in accounting and auditing field. Besides studying, I spent my time participating in other activities as well such as organizing Youth Union's events, charity works. As a result, the title "SVNT" was awarded to me as a proof for my contributions in 5 aspects: Academic accomplishment, Ethics, Physical fitness, Skills and Integration.
Now, I have been working in an audit firm for 7 months since I graduated from the university. In this period of time, I have applied theoretical knowledge that I was learnt in university into reality; it helps me understand clearly about the financial statements and components of these reports. Moreover, I also believe that working in an audit firm is a great chance for me to contact, share ideas and experiences about accounting, auditing and finance among professionals and finance enthusiasts. In my opinion, the time working here has a part in cherishing my desire to take a post graduate course in Finance.
A Master of Finance course in Melbourne University will provide me an opportunity to widen my knowledge in a dynamic and academic environment. Furthermore, studying in Australia is a chance for me not only to challenge myself by studying and living in a new country, but also to discover a new culture and to make friends with many people all around the world. I believe that invaluable knowledge and experiences studied from great professors in Melbourne University would be a stepping stone for my future life and career. I really appreciate your time considering my application and I hope that this information has depicted both my academic ability and personal motivation to take a further study in Finance.