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Personal statement for NUS maritime program application


showmaker 1 / -  
Sep 5, 2023   #1
I'm a senior Chinese student applying for a Masters programme in Maritime Studies at both NUS and NTU, I feel that my personal statement is informative at the beginning and end but needs to be trimmed down to retain the focus, and I'm open to any structural, content and grammatical advice!

Personal statement



"Learning from the hundred rivers, virtue from the four seas."
When I came into the school gate of Dalian Maritime University for the first time as a freshman, I was confused by this school motto, which is taken from the Analects of Confucius.

As a student from an inland city in China, I knew nothing about any of the industries related to the sea, and even chose my major, Transportation, simply because it was ranked very highly in China's national subject assessment and was considered to be just a traditional engineering discipline. That's also the main reason for my initial confusion. However, after three years of growth and study, I have become a mature person with a broad global perspective, a strong shipping background and frontline practical experience who is determined to pursue a career in the maritime industry. This is due to the amazing glamour and challenges of the shipping industry.

Dalian is the home of my alma mater. It was in this seaside city, which boasts China's first maritime university and serves as the centre of China's Northeast Asian shipping, that I witnessed the amazing power of the maritime industry. My three-year undergraduate education at Dalian Maritime University provided me with a solid foundation of transport knowledge and a background in shipping, whose professional knowledge and curriculum are among the best in "Project 211" in China. In addition, as an engineering interdisciplinary subject, it required me to dabble in management, economics and computer science, which laid a solid foundation for my data analytics skills and mastery of economic principles. In this context, I achieved an excellent average of 88/100 during my undergraduate studies and had a full passion and firm endorsement of the shipping industry, which resulted in several school and corporate-sponsored scholarships. I laid the foundations of traditional transportation through courses in road and rail and air transport, and embarked on a unique foreign trade shipping after a major diversion in my junior academic year.

Apart from placing extra emphasis on sophisticated theoretical instruction, the rich project experience in logistics and supply chain management, international multimodal transport, foreign trade transport experiments, freight business simulation and other specialised courses is also an important source of my rich passion for the shipping industry. The most impressive one is the foreign trade transport project design. In the course design, we based on seacosMACS3-stowman software to carry out a 4250 TEU ship of the Asian liner route accumulation simulation, not only to consider the general idea of loading, general container loading, special container loading, ship parameter requirements (stability, strength, draught, blind zone), and according to the volume of real-time adjustment of each port of the bridge settings, loading and unloading efficiency requirements, tied lashing programme. Requirements, fastening and lashing programme. Moreover, after the simulation process, I have strengthened the foundation for long-term development in terms of concept, technology and practical application effect. To my surprise, being exposed to the study of the design process, I started to turn these projects into enjoyment because they helped me to integrate my knowledge from different courses and semesters into a series of interacting operations of the projects and to understand all aspects of the shipping field from inside or outside of a single project.

Discontentment with performing well on campus, knowing the crucial importance of a global mindset and horizon for a maritime talent, I made breakthroughs in several international exchange activities too. I took part in the "Global Competence" training course for young talents held by the Dalian University of Technology, where I worked with international students from different cultures to learn about the overview of international organisations, young talent programme, China and international organisations as told by UN officials, and ultimately collaborated on a project featuring No Poverty in the UN's 17 Sustainable Development Goals (SDGs). In addition, with the help of school resources, I attended a seminar on "Opportunities for Students and Graduates within the International Maritime Organisation and the wider United Nations system" presented by Michael Guy, an official from the International Maritime Organisation's (IMO) Legal Affairs and External Relations Division. In Michael's presentation, I learned about the important role of the maritime industry in the globalisation process from another brand new dimension, that is, from the perspective of international governments and organisations, and I also got answers to some of my doubts about my career planning in the Q&A session, which has strengthened my determination to move towards a more open and higher level of shipping centre.

Out of my appreciation for the ancient Chinese philosopher Wang Yangming's idea of "unity of knowledge and action", I particularly aspire to the programme's unique 15-week internship practicum (for full-time students) in a maritime-related company and opportunities like seminars, workshops, and industry visits. My internship experiences in Hebei Anxin Maritime Bureau and Fuzhou Fugang International Logistics Company respectively provided me with different perspectives of government agencies and logistics enterprises in the shipping industry, and I was able to understand the necessity for the government and enterprises to cooperate and achieve harmony in order to have a healthy and efficient development in the shipping industry. Whether it is government policies or busy business in the market, I have achieved the combination of frontline operation and professional knowledge, and the sense of achievement thus generated has made me more enthusiastic. On the other hand, I also feel that the maritime industry is about to undergo a huge change, A major direction is the industry-wide move towards digitalisation and technological innovation, and accordingly, I need to keep up with the times and equip myself with skillsets enabling the next-generation maritime and logistics capabilities worldwide, including the latest data analytics, port, maritime and logistics technologies, which is one of the highlights that attracted me to your programme.

Currently, Singapore has access to more than 600 ports around the world and has been awarded the "World's No. 1 Shipping Centre" several times over the past decade. Through watching the introduction and videos of the programme on the official website, I deeply realised that MTM, as Singapore's first Master's programme focusing on Maritime Technology and Digitalisation, which is strongly supported by industry and regulators including the Port of Singapore and the Maritime Authority of Singapore, was a perfect match for me in terms of my undergraduate programme background, training objectives, and my career plan. If I am accepted into the programme, I, as a member of the MTM alumni community, will contribute to the cause of developing a strong maritime innovation ecosystem at the local, regional and global levels.

As I was getting ready to walk out of the school gate today, I have been like the motto, setting out on a journey to another river, and spreading virtue to another land. Finally, I understand the true heart of DMU, to show every innocent student like me the ripples and greatness of shipping, to show us another possibility. What's different this time is that I'm ready to admire the wonders of maritime challenge in Singapore.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,844 4785  
Sep 16, 2023   #2
Well, a personal statement should not be an extensive academic biography of the student. So that is where the main problem of your personal statement lies. The reviewer will definitely get an extended explanation of your academic record, but it will not tell him enough about yourself on a personal basis, which is the whole point of this essay. Let him get to know you beyond the academics. You have focused too much on that in this essay so there is an imbalance in information about you. Try to create a semblance of your other interests in the presentation. Make sure he gets to know the private side alongside the academic side. That should balance out the presentation.


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