CArinze
Sep 8, 2019
Graduate / Chevening scholarship will enhance my leadership skills and prepare me for managerial positions [3]
Nuku, I think your introduction is quite different from what the body of the essay talked about. If you must want to put this introduction, then let it be linked to how your dear father encouraged you to be the best version of yourself and standout or something relating to leadership, so that your examples can be in line with your intro.
Please check your punctuations and use capital letter after full stop.
... which I havebeen honed over the years.
Also, in you third paragraph,
Then one day Managing Director called for ...
You can make a better statement, your story became boring at some point. Consider something like this: in one of the meetings organized by the Managing Director, I suggested to the administration that English speaking would be a better language of communication for effective.... Even though it wasn't initially accepted, through my persistent influence and initiation of ideas on how to go about achieving this... the management finally adopted and encouraged all staff to hone their English language skill. As a result, I helped teach few Staff English language outside of work... I don't know but I think something like this will be better.
Nuku, I think your introduction is quite different from what the body of the essay talked about. If you must want to put this introduction, then let it be linked to how your dear father encouraged you to be the best version of yourself and standout or something relating to leadership, so that your examples can be in line with your intro.
Please check your punctuations and use capital letter after full stop.
... which I have
Also, in you third paragraph,
Then one day Managing Director called for ...
You can make a better statement, your story became boring at some point. Consider something like this: in one of the meetings organized by the Managing Director, I suggested to the administration that English speaking would be a better language of communication for effective.... Even though it wasn't initially accepted, through my persistent influence and initiation of ideas on how to go about achieving this... the management finally adopted and encouraged all staff to hone their English language skill. As a result, I helped teach few Staff English language outside of work... I don't know but I think something like this will be better.