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Posts by econsangel
Joined: Sep 26, 2006
Last Post: Nov 6, 2006
Threads: 4
Posts: 19  
From: Singapore

Displayed posts: 23
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econsangel   
Sep 26, 2006
Undergraduate / Paper on an econ. concept that help u understand an issue in ur life [10]

Please help me correct my essay, I have tried to do it after the topic following:
I have got my writing essay result : C+, very bad result. I was very disappointed. I am trying to do better.

Select a concept from your discipline, and use it to answer this question: How does it help you understand an issue that drives or impacts your life?

In 250-300 words, explain the concept to a non-specialist audience, and integrate it into your issue. Your essay must be uncluttered, and demonstrate a clear understanding of the writing mechanics you have learnt in the course.


Making decisions is never easy, especially the ones that are the most important in our lives. But luckily for me, allowing myself to think in terms of "opportunity cost", one of the key concepts I have studied in my major economics, has made it possible to gain perspective and sanity over some tough decisions.

Opportunity cost, is just a way of measuring the true cost of something by looking at your next best alternative. However, its power comes in not being limited to measuring cost in terms of money. I often remind myself of my unforgettable memory when I was young and graduated from my secondary school. At that time, I found it time-wasting to study, I wanted to earn money to spend on my hobbies, to prove that I was not a little girl. However, I could not find any jobs suitable for my age. Thus, I had to come back to my studying.Up to now I have become an economic student and pursuing my full-time degree in a university. Thanks to my major, the concept of the "opportunity cost" in particular, it has helped me see clearly how not to lose a lot of valuable things in my life. Because you only have so much time and money to spend, in other words, neither is unlimited, you have to think carefully before making decisions. To do that, we ought to be taking (or to take?) not in terms of the cost of it or others, but the opportunity cost of them. Under my circumstance, I might earn much money by working but will lose much more without studying. Studying gives me not only valuable knowledge but also life experience. And after graduating, I believe I will be able to find a suitable job and face up to the life with confidence.

Career decisions, as well as all other types of decisions always have opportunity cost. I prefer the "opportunity cost" concept to any another tool ( I think it should be another tool) when making important decisions in my life.

Good bye, Have a nice day!
econsangel   
Sep 27, 2006
Undergraduate / Paper on an econ. concept that help u understand an issue in ur life [10]

thanks a lot,
I have checked some mistakes in my essay about spelling, thank you.
but I cannot find where have the wrong grammar, what do you mean? I false in using tenses or constructions?
I have corrected all the places that you have suggested, thanks a lot too.
Would you mind telling me whether I have written my essay right to the topic request?
Because I really feel my essay is still not good for the topic but I cannot rewrite it anymore. I have tried to rewrite it once.

thanks a lot,
and now it is my correction for the last sentence:
I prefer the "opportunity cost" concept to any another tool to apply in where I find doing so is natural.
Do you understand my sentence better?
thanks again, ^.^
Ha.
I will try to write more and more.
econsangel   
Oct 1, 2006
Undergraduate / Paper on an econ. concept that help u understand an issue in ur life [10]

Thank you very much for helping me !

Actually I am trying much to be better in writing,

I have re-corrected all the new things you corrected for me!
I am going to hand in this essay to my teacher through a system.

And I also hope you can help me correct more essay in the next time.

Thanks, Have a nice day!
Ha.
econsangel   
Oct 2, 2006
Undergraduate / Paper on an econ. concept that help u understand an issue in ur life [10]

Thank you, Sarah!
I have read all, thank you, but never mind, I don't worry anymore, because If having any confuse, I will try to explain after.

And my biggest purpose is can improve my writing ^.^
OK, I have read another material about uncluttered writing, it said that, you should not have above 3 prepositions in one sentence.
Would you mind when I said that though we have corrected my essay together, I will find something that is not correct in uncluttered writing.

Due to my reason above, I can show you a few examples I find still not suitable:

But luckily for me, allowing myself to think in terms of "opportunity cost,"
one of the key concepts I have studied in my major, economics, has made it possible to gain perspective and sanity over some tough decisions.

Opportunity cost is just a way of measuring the true cost of something by looking at your next best alternative.

Sorry, I cannot find the substitues for any propositions in the first, but in the second, may I replace "looking at" by "considering"?

Hope for your help,

Thanks.
econsangel   
Oct 11, 2006
Undergraduate / Story telling topic; essay based on an interview with a member of your family [12]

Hello!
I have taken steps to other topic! It is about story telling!
As I read in a book, I see the phrase "tell the story in the third-person voice", I don't understand it much, would you mind explaining for me what the third-person voice means?

and this is my essay

Since I am in Singapore, I have met many people, but I especially paid attention to a man, Mr. Chew, who always looked happy although his business was much busy. When I asked him about this, he cheerfully shared his story which had a great impact on his life.

The story happened 20 years ago. At that time, Mr. Chew was a very young ambitious businessman. He had a small family in the center of Singapore with a wonderful wife who always sacrificed for him and their little daughter. However, Work took so much of his time that he neglected his family. His daughter longed for more love and attention from her father. Business competitiveness made him even get angry with them.

One morning, his little daughter happily whispered to him that she would like him to come back to her early. She said she had something special just for him. He agreed without noticing what she mentioned in her words. (<>May I change into indirect way? What do u think is better? The direct or indirect way?) <>That evening, he ignored the time he should go home as his promise. He thought that everything would be alright and his little daughter's saying was not important at all. It was quite late then, feeling something bad happening made him cannot concentrate on his work. Suddenly, the phone rang, he realized the voice of his wife. She was panic when informing that their little daughter had gone out for more than two hours. He madly rushed out to drive home as fast as he could. "Only when experiencing the feeling of losing something do you find out that thing is really important to you." He said me then. (<>If I still want to interupt by his saying to me, may I do this? Because I want the story to be better, soulful<>). In the dull house, he saw his wife's frightened face and suddenly huge her tightly, which rarely had he acted like that before. They were in a hurry to find their daughter. They looked for her everywhere in vain. It was getting darker and darker. Mr. Chew regretted because of his empty promise. They continued to search, but were beginning to lose hope. There was only a frightening wild wood in front of them. He wondered if his little daughter dare to be in there in such the darkness. But there was something prodding him go in that wood... Oh god! His farther was sitting under a big tree with a frightened face. She busted into tears when seeing her father. He took the daughter in his arm and understood all.

He found the happiness in his wife's eyes. Never did he fell so happy and love his small family so much. He understood that nothing was so valuable as his family. Since that he has cared for his family more, this also has brought his comfort after hard working hours.

He ended up his story with such a bright smile that I cannot forget until now. I always remind myself of his last saying: "I have realized the most important in my life, it is not to pursue the success by all means, but when I can bring the happiness to not only myself but also my dear persons."

Hope for your help! If anything still wrong, I will continue to correct it, thanks
Ha.
econsangel   
Oct 12, 2006
Undergraduate / Story telling topic; essay based on an interview with a member of your family [12]

And there is something I feel confusing, they (my book) said that "Story telling helps embody and transfer complete information", on the other hand, they also said that "Don't say everything right way", and "Let the reader do some work", so what will we write completely? what won't we write completely ?(means let readers do some work?)

And how to create picture words? (it means I have to describe pictures about people and places in my story?)

Thanks, Madam!
econsangel   
Oct 13, 2006
Undergraduate / Story telling topic; essay based on an interview with a member of your family [12]

Oh, they are very helpful to me, Ms. Sarah!
But when I tell a story in the third-person voice, I cannot show the direct dialogue, such as "shut up!" like you said, right? (also because I see the topic said that "Do not use a question and answer format or include extended dialogue.")

So how to make picture words without describe his face, right?
Thanks, I will start writing story now, hope for your help.
Have a nice day!
Ha.
econsangel   
Oct 13, 2006
Undergraduate / Story telling topic; essay based on an interview with a member of your family [12]

Ok, this is my topic I have chosen to write :
Write an essay based on an interview with a member of your immediate or extended
family. Ask your interviewee to share an experience that has left a significant mark on
his or her life.
You should apply appropriate storytelling techniques in your essay, such as heightening reader interest and creating word pictures. In addition, you should frame your essay within a setting that clearly conveys the time and place of the story that was told to you.

Do not use a question and answer format or include extended dialogue.
Your essay, written in the third-person voice, should be 450-500 words long. It must be
coherent and cohesive, and must apply the principles of plain and uncluttered writing.
econsangel   
Oct 19, 2006
Essays / "One minute for yourself" book! [5]

Hi, I have to write about my favourite writer, I like to read the book "One minute for yourself" of the author Dr.Spencer Johnson most!

But I cannot find the English edition of the book in my university's libraries.
I have just read the book in Vietnamese language when I was in my countryhome.
I have tried to find some English paragraphs in this book through Internet but I have failed.
Now I don't know how to do, May I can translate some paragraphs I like in this book from Vietnamese into English directly, carelessly the accuracy of the orginal English Edition?

If you know the website address that I can read some paragraphs of this book in English free, please help me.
Otherwise, I know this book is also famous, so If you have it and can type for me some (2 or 3) paragraphs you feel interested (because I like almost pages in this book), I am thankful a lot.

Have a nice day.
Ha.
econsangel   
Oct 20, 2006
Undergraduate / Expository Essay question - choosing and re-writing my essay? [16]

Hi, Sarah!
Thanks for your help!
My teacher have given out a topic like this:
"Pick a piece of writing from your portfolio and revise it into an expository essay of around 700-750 words"

But I don't understand the request much!
What is a expository essay?
And As far as I understand, this request means that I can choose one of my essay, and simply I re-write it (still be right to the topic) in another length, is it right ?

This is my expository essay that I have written it and I am sure that you will see a lot of improvements :)!

Every morning, when I wake up, I often spend sometime in thinking about things. I enjoy feeling a powerful new day with the sunlight, with the light wind and with the pure sound of birds. Now when being a foreign student in a strange place, I have more things to worry about. But this habit has made me revitalized every morning and my mind is refreshed so that I always feel merry and optimistic.

I am a sensitive girl but not a weak one. I worry about my family back in Vietnam. I think of my family, my close friends and my place where I was born and grew up. Heavy pressure in my new life cannot eliminate these holy from my head. I always keep the images of my loved people and my home country in my mind. I feel lucky because I have my happy family as well as my sweet childhood. I love my people who are dear to me. I often remind myself of when my parents cared for me, they were really my true friends. I miss my lovely sister so much! Every time I played with her, I liked to look into her innocent eyes which brought me comfort. I remember the summer holiday in my countryside. That the place is peaceful and I feel relaxed after the hard-working at school. On the other hand, the busy streets of Hanoi, where I lived and studied also makes a special impression on me. I never will forget the nice memories with my close friends, when we studied and played with each other. Apart from those times, when I was alone, I liked to walk on the streets, to hear daily stories of the Hanoians, to see gradual development of my city.

Being far away from the those things that are dear to me makes me feel lonely. However, I always kept in my mind that I needed to come over the difficulties to make my ambition come true. I set my goals since I was in secondary school. I hoped to become a useful citizen who contributes to the growth of my country. I planned to study economics abroad. I understood that dreams were nice but hard. Therefore, I tried my best to study English hard as well as to read economics news everyday to prepare for the university entrance examination. Luckily, my dream came true. I was accepted into Nanyang Technological University to study Economics. However, there were still many new challenges to me when I first came to Singapore. Feeling sad and being without my loved ones, I could not concentrate on my study. Afterwards, I thought of the advice of my dad that I had to be strong. I have tried to stand on my own feet.

It has been three months since I arrived in Singapore. Now I have not felt as strange as the first. I have many new friends, who are good to me. We help each other come over difficulties in both studies and daily matters. I like my new life here, because it brings me new discoveries and challenges, the new friends and my own independence. I often told my friends about Vietnam, especially Hanoi, when I have free time. Although Vietnam is poor, I still love it much. I feel proud when I tell them about the brave deaths of young Vietnamese soldiers for our country. I also enjoy hearing about the countries of my foreign friends, especially about their customs. I hope that I will be able to visit their countries on one day.

Sometimes I stop everything and think of things in life. I wonder why many people find it difficult to look for their happiness. Happiness is something simple to me. I am happy just to chatter away with my friends. I can smile when I look out the window to face the bright sun and feel the warm breeze. When I close my eyes and think of my loved once, sadness is expelled in a wink. The thought of me going back to work in Vietnam, to devote my knowledge gained abroad to the growth of my country in the future inspires me. I am then, prepared to face any challenges that lie ahead.

I have had a busy period to prepare for my final exam but still spend a part in writing !
Hope you can see my effort! And you will feel acceptable my new essay :)
And also, hope for your help :)
Thanks and have a nice day!
Ha.
econsangel   
Oct 21, 2006
Undergraduate / Expository Essay question - choosing and re-writing my essay? [16]

Thanks,
But If the topic is "This is me", I have to write in a length : 750 words under the expository essay, what should I write about this, I think it is not of anything you have explained for me.

Hope for your help.
Ha.
econsangel   
Oct 21, 2006
Undergraduate / Expository Essay question - choosing and re-writing my essay? [16]

This is the sufficient topic of my first assignment I want to revise in the expository essay:
Why? Because I have been disappointed about the result of my first assignment, just only C+, now I will try to change this into the much better one.

Write 200-250 words on this topic: "This is me."
In your short essay, pay particular attention to your voice. Choose words that will convey who you are and the impression you want to leave. Consider also why you are writing and for whom. Is your purpose expressive, conative, informative, or poetic?

Your essay must contain at least one example of each of these four sentence patterns: balanced, cumulative, periodic, and serial.
Yes, that is. Would you mind explaining me how to write a expository based on this topic?
thanks a lot, Sarah.
Have a nice day.
econsangel   
Oct 23, 2006
Undergraduate / Expository Essay question - choosing and re-writing my essay? [16]

Hi, Sarah!
This is the definitions of 4 sentence patterns :
- A serial construction is a sentence which consists of a series of three or more corresponding ideas in the parallel form.
+ For a series to exist, each item in the series has to deal with a corresponding idea.
+ There must be a sequence or development of ideas over the sentence.
- A balanced sentence consists of a pair of ides that share a contrasting relationship.
+ A balanced structure works differently in our minds from a serial construction.
+ Instead of a development of ideas, a balanced pair forces the mind to turn back on itself.
+ Balanced pairs accentuate comparisons or sharpen distinctions.
+ Balanced pairs deal with reciprocal relationships.
- A cumulative sentence begins with a main clause.
+ It follows with a sequence of additions that modify the main clause, or modify some aspects of the additions that have just preceded them.
+ The addtions move from general to specific, or from abstract to concrete.
+ The additions are usually not linked by connectives.
- A periodic sentence places the main idea at the end of the sentence.
- Create a sense of anticipation.
- Require a greater degree of attentiveness from a reader.

So hope you can check for me.

And I am sorry, I don't understand what syntax errors are, can you explain and give me examples from my essay, I will try to correct them, I am re-writing my essay ;

Have a nice day.

Ha.
econsangel   
Oct 23, 2006
Undergraduate / Expository Essay question - choosing and re-writing my essay? [16]

I am sorry, I change the sentence :

Feeling sad and being without my loved ones made it hard to concentrate on my studying.

into this :

Feeling sad and being without my loved ones, I could not concentrate on my studying.

My new sentence is the right periodic sentence. Thanks :)
econsangel   
Oct 26, 2006
Undergraduate / Expository Essay question - choosing and re-writing my essay? [16]

Hi, Sarah!
I would like to ask you a question, may I can write a expressive essay under a expository essay? Because my teacher said much about expository essay like a research essay? She gave a lot of examples about research essay, I have not asked her.

Can you help me the answer?
I have been still re-editing my essay "this is me", if you say "yes", this will make me try more, don't care anything more. If not, I will have to chang almost.

And I have a bad new ]. I have received the result of my story telling essay, (do you still remember it?) and I got B-, I don't know, I am quite sad, but I think the mistakes my teacher indicated in my essay are correct. (My teacher is also American). I tried to write this essay a lot. Maybe we didn't pay attention to it carefully. This bad result really makes me upset.

Now I am trying to writing my assignment 4, my last assignment to raise my result
Hope that you do not mind helping me, I promise to try my best to make it perfect, I don't want to receive any bad essay result anymore.

Thanks.
Ha.
econsangel   
Oct 27, 2006
Undergraduate / Expository Essay question - choosing and re-writing my essay? [16]

Hi, Sarah!
I have asked my tutor about my expository essay!
She said that a good expository essay is an essay which have to focus on what you want the reader know, especially in the "this is me" essay.

Now I really confuse, as far as she said, I think my essay I have written (my above "this is me" essay) doesn't focus on one particular thing, right?

Do you think that? If so, I will have to re-written almost my essay.
But if you think I have to re-write almost, can you give me a suggestion that makes my essay focus more on one particular thing?

I also asked my teacher whether I can write my essay under expressive purpose for an expository essay and she said that I can.
Hope for your help.
I still want to write my essay under expressive purpose and I don't want to write much about my life in Singapore, I think I don't have much feeling to write about my life here.

Have a nice day, Sarah!
Thanks.
Ha.
econsangel   
Nov 6, 2006
Essays / "One minute for yourself" book! [5]

Oh, Hi !

I am sorry for my late reply, because I am very busy with my final examination now !
Can you tell me where do you live now?
If you are in Vietnam now, I think you can find it easy to buy this book in Vietnamese version ^.^ in any public or private bookshop. This book is a product bought by "First News" - a famous book supplier in Viet Nam now.

I don't know whether this book can purchased through internet or not. You can ask for the supplier of this book, they are the monopoly of this book in Vietnam.

This is their website: firstnews.com.vn
Hope that I am useful :)

Have a nice day!
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