Undergraduate / personal essay. uc. a move changed everything or almost. [15]

It's a great one!!!
I really like it...
but just one more thing, I feel the ending is not strong enough. Can you add a bit more talking about your passion and ambition?

Undergraduate / Tufts required essay- describe the environment in which you were raised. [4]

Can you post the entire essay here??I don't know why I can only see a paragraph.