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Posts by laughatmyname
Joined: Nov 20, 2009
Last Post: Dec 1, 2009
Threads: 1
Posts: 9  
From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 10
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laughatmyname   
Nov 20, 2009
Undergraduate / UC Prompt; Repressed Memoir of My Past [24]

PROMPT ONE: Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?

Everybody I associate with would consider me a happy-go-lucky, bright, creative, smart and sophisticated girl. There is never a frown upon my face and if anybody wants to have a good time they always call me. I seem to be able to laugh and have an excellent conversation with both adults and people my age. I always look at a cup as half full and dull days are only caused by people around me that are sad. I've been told how lucky I am and some people wish they could live my life and smile as often as I do. However, I always tell those closest to me that these masks we all wear can seem so convincing. I guess my mask was so well executed that nobody would guess I was diagnosed with depression.

A few months before I started High School I was sexually assaulted and almost raped. To this day it's a memory that I will never forget. The feeling of humiliation and shame seemed to stick like Velcro, so I covered the blister-like marks on my neck and chest with the hair that usually stayed up in a ballerina's bun. I willingly obeyed to the consequence for not coming home for my curfew and kept the crime swept under the rug for about a year. Constant flashbacks prevented me from holding in the recollection of that night, so I accepted the tears and braced myself with the harsh reality that life isn't fair at all. Finally, I told my mother how I was unwillingly forced to surrender my will.

Four years is a long time for an adventure and I can't say I'm cured, however, I do believe things happen for a reason so I thrived on that concept. My depression has ceased and my genuine smile has peeked out like a sun through the clouds after a long storm. I feel as if I have been forced to experience moments that not everybody is familiar with and that that night has subconsciously molded and shaped my dreams and aspirations. I've met many different psychologists, some are wonderful and others seem to be driven by the amount written on a checkbook. I realized that those that have a scar from the past can sincerely tape up a severely wounded heart without an incentive. I plan to fulfill my desires and prove to multiple individuals that what they have done has only produced another therapist instead of another victim. I want to become a psychologist because I am so proud of my observant personality and listening to stories and acting like a therapist to those around me was never classified as a chore, but more like a gift. I wish to play a role in which I can reconstruct torn wishes and lives, just like what he had done to mine.
laughatmyname   
Nov 20, 2009
Undergraduate / "As a child, I was basically perfect." - Describe the world you come from [8]

I absolutely love love the way you write. I never skipped a word or a sentence and my eyes were practically glued onto the screen while I read your essay. (I think I might of even rubbed my eyes cuz I forgot to blink.)

The one thing I feel would help, if I am replying too late, I apologize, is that I felt like I read a story more than an essay answer to the prompt. I had the same mistake, so I don't blame you, but from what I hear, they wanna see somebody who can answer the question they are asking, but tell a story at the same time. They essentially want the answer to flow out of what they read.

Reread what you wrote, and ask yourself. What was my talent, experience, accomplishment or contribution that screams YOU? Is that in your essay? or are you simply just saying that you were not motivated and very pessimistic before but stepped it up a notch in the summer of Junior year?

But keep up the wonderful work with the tone of the essay. Its a good character to show off.
laughatmyname   
Nov 20, 2009
Undergraduate / UC Prompt; Repressed Memoir of My Past [24]

Oh gawsh. I probably should read the rules, but I think the answers I got so far really helps.

Its a hard essay for me to show people I look in the eyes everyday, so when i came across this site i was so excited. (haha!)....wait, where are the rules?

pinkxp92 : You have a really good point there about the first sentence and thank you for throwing it out there. It was so obvious but I didn't catch it. & as to "that night", I would like to say that I appreciate your feelings for me, I really do, and I don't know if how I said it was really the right way to say it but thanks. I've grown from it and I didn't think I would ever be able to share this experience until I realized that I can take advantage of that moment and apply it to my essay to get into college! theres always something good behind everything huh? thank you again!

The UC's I'm applying to is Davis(long shot, but dream school), Merced, Santa Cruz and Santa Barbara. Which ones are yours?

shinji344: I couldn't find where I wrote they, but I saw the 'he' part and that would be a nameless man without a conscience. I wrote him, because I don't know his name. && the friends part is a fantastic point. Thank you!
laughatmyname   
Nov 20, 2009
Undergraduate / UC Prompt; Repressed Memoir of My Past [24]

Oh man! Don't say that! I applied to Davis, even if I KNOW I wont be accepted, just because maybe they might be looking for somebody that fits my description? (probably not..haha. damnitm I'm no help.)

A few of my friends are attending Santa Cruz and I hear its very very nice. They seem to like it.

Thanks for giving me some information on the campuses! I haven't visited yet but I did a bunch of research and spoke to people who know about the school, either first hand or by word of mouth.

Merced, from what I heard/read they are making a medical building fairly soon? That should encourage people to attend! And I hear that its like a public private school because of the amount of students that attend. 21:1 ratio.

Santa Barbara is a party school, but a close friend of mine is there and he loves it. He says that if your personality is strong enough not to mingle with the crowd they respect you. Which I thought was nice.

I know Merced would accept a lot of students not really based on their academic score or anything, so hopefully I can make it to at least one! Thats why I had to buckle down on the essays.

ps. texts from washing machines? epic.
laughatmyname   
Nov 21, 2009
Undergraduate / UC Prompt 2 : Helping a friend in need [4]

Its a good essay, its well put and I finished reading it and it put a smile on my face. The only part I cringed about was the first paragraph when I read the word Party. I think you should find a way to tell this story without making the reader think your an alcoholic and attend parties. I feel like no matter how good the essay was, this could be a negative view from their eyes.
laughatmyname   
Nov 23, 2009
Undergraduate / UC Prompt; Repressed Memoir of My Past [24]

Did I violate a rule??
I'm utterly confused, if I offended anybody from the topic of this essay I apologize in advance!
laughatmyname   
Nov 26, 2009
Undergraduate / UC Prompt; Repressed Memoir of My Past [24]

tim: thank you for the 411 on UC Davis and UC S-to the-B. It isn't about the essay but, in a way, it is..i'll back myself up. Its about schools that we are applying to and this forum is about essays that we are writing, and this thread is about an essay we are writing to get into the school? I'm pulling some strings but I hope that somehow makes you feel more confident about your response! && thanks again!

ps. doubledecker bus? that definitely earns the school an abundance of epic points.

Godizgood: It wasn't anything towards your name, I just didn't know what to call you by so I used your username. Like Kevin said, caps makes it seem like youre yelling. It could be different to different people, but I think in general.

& mister Kevin: I'm liking the part in red. Your advice will be sewn into my essay.
laughatmyname   
Dec 1, 2009
Undergraduate / UC Prompt; Repressed Memoir of My Past [24]

When I heard that the deadline of the UC applications is finally over, I had a bit of a sad attitude. I felt like I was saying farewell to this thread. How comedic is that?

I just had to share.
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