Posts by lfloyd11

lfloyd11

Nov 6, 2011

Undergraduate / 'After getting denied...' - my transfer essay [5]

Hi!
I am planning on transferring from a local community college to Virginia Tech. I am having to explain why I wish to transfer from the college I am now attending to Virginia Tech. Can someone please read this essay and give me suggestions and/or edit this for me please? All of your help is greatly appreciated! :)

Finding out that I was denied admission to Virginia Tech as a freshman was devastating; however, I now see it as a blessing in disguise. After getting denied, I made up my mind that I was going to push harder against adversity instead of letting it define what I could accomplish. Since I knew Virginia Tech was the only college I wished to attend, I decided to go to a local community college and work hard to reach my goal of being a Hokie. While at Danville Community College, I worked extremely hard to ensure a smooth transition into Virginia Tech. I feel as though taking classes at DCC for one year was the best option for me. I have been able to get the feel of college courses and get my basics out of the way. I have grown stronger as a student and feel as though I can tackle any college course I am faced with. I have thoroughly made the most of my time here at DCC but am now ready to start my sophomore year at Virginia Tech. Considering I cannot get a bachelor's degree at Danville Community College, I would like to transfer to Virginia Tech and major in Human Development to become an elementary school teacher. I know that I will get more out of the programs of study available in Blacksburg than any other university in the state. With all of this being said, I ask you to consider me for admission for Fall 2012.

lfloyd11

Dec 8, 2011

Undergraduate / Virginia tech essay: 5 Reasons why you want to attend virginia tech [4]

I feel you need more to it. Put a little more of detail of why Blacksburg would be a great place to live. Also, it sounds very generic, like you don't know a lot about the community or how it is being a Hokie. Try and make it more personal. Best of luck to you!

lfloyd11

Dec 8, 2011

Undergraduate / veterinary medicine -VT Essay - the five top reasons you want to attend Virginia Tech [5]

I must say that this is a very good personal statement. You made it personal and gave specific details about VT. We actually took my sick dog to the vetinary hospital in Blacksburg. I am sure that you will get a lot out of the program at Tech. I wish you all the best!

lfloyd11

Dec 8, 2011

Undergraduate / What are the benefits of a diverse educational community? (Virginia Tech) [3]

The benefits of a diverse educational community are endless. A diverse educational community brings different people, cultures, languages, and more. As I begin my journey at Virginia Tech, I will come in contact with people that are not only from a different country, but also people with disabilities, people with different economical statuses, and people with different preferences of sexual orientation. I will not only learn to communicate with different types of people, but also learn to accept individuals for who they are and respect their morals and beliefs. By doing so, I will be able to take the knowledge I learn from them and carry it with me as I enter the work force. I am prepared to accept this challenge as I continue my college career. I believe that Virginia Tech will be a perfect fit to not only study from a rigorous curriculum, but also gain a better knowledge of the types of people the world holds.

I am not sure what else to write. I don't want to sound generic, but I'm having a difficult time coming up with ideas for this topic. Also, it has to be 250 words or less.

lfloyd11

Dec 8, 2011

Book Reports / 'Not really fit in' - Describe a character in fiction - Belonging [7]

I do agree with the changed that helterskelter made. This is a very interesting essay and I enjoyed reading it. You are extremely talented and have a great imagination. Overall, your grammar looks fine and I do not think it is too long. You give enough details for the reader to understand without saying too much. Good job!

lfloyd11

Dec 9, 2011

Undergraduate / 'After getting denied...' - my transfer essay [5]

SLIGHTLY UPDATED. I am not 100% finished but here is what I have so far. I tried to put in more specific details pertaining to me instead of sounding bland and generic.

Finding out that I was denied admission to Virginia Tech as a freshman was devastating; however, I now see it as a blessing in disguise. After getting denied, I made up my mind that I was going to push harder against adversity instead of letting it define what I could accomplish. Since I knew Virginia Tech was the only college I wished to attend, I decided to go to a local community college and work hard to reach my goal of studying at Virginia Tech. While at Danville Community College, I have worked extremely hard to ensure a smooth transition. I feel as though taking classes at DCC for one year was the best option for me. I have been able to get the feel of college courses and get my basics out of the way while living in the comfort of my own home. I have grown stronger as a student and feel as though I can tackle any college course I would be faced with. I have thoroughly made the most out of my time here at DCC, but am now ready to start my sophomore year at Virginia Tech. At DCC, I cannot graduate with an associate's degree. I have made high goals for myself to major in Human Development and receive my master's degree in elementary education. I also crave to get the full college experience. I have high hopes of living in a dorm room and learning to live and get along with a roommate. In addition, I plan on joining a sorority and getting the feeling of being part of a close family which my current college does not offer. After doing much research, I know that I will get more out of the opportunities in Blacksburg than in any college in the state.