Writing Feedback / TOEFL - new technology helps students a lot [3]

I think it's great that you use detailed example to construct you essay, and it's better to include more information in your introduction paragraph and last paragraph.

Besides, try more complicated sentences, not just something like "It is quicker and easier."

Writing Feedback / dressing style is not a good indication of character [2]

I think you've done a pretty good job, as it is your first practice.

Just pay attention to some grammar.
eg:
"the style a person is dressed can reflected his/her character or personality. "
one's dress style can reflected his/her character or personality

"one dressed in nice clothes does not mean he or she is a decent person"
dressed in nice clothes does not mean he or she is a decent person

"One's character is mostly depended on his or her spirit and ideas"
One's character mostly depends on his or her spirit and ideas

"it requires lots of time and money to make a person looked well"
it requires lots of time and money to make a person look well

Besides, pay more attention to singular and plural, the tense.

Good luck!