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Posts by Zayniac
Joined: Dec 29, 2008
Last Post: Dec 30, 2008
Threads: 2
Posts: 5  
From: Canada

Displayed posts: 7
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Zayniac   
Dec 29, 2008
Undergraduate / Common Apps Essay (two very different worlds: US and Korea) [5]

It's really good!
BUT
Dont'say should have said sorry to the GUY - you need to be slightly more formal, I think...say isntead, to the boy
Or rewrite it like this, perhaps:
Instead of "I was supposed to say "I am very sorry, sir" to the guy, not "sorry, man.""
I should have said "I am very sorry, sir," to the boy, not "sorry, man."

and he put you ON the school's soccer team, not in it
too shy AND did not say w ord..
Just a thought..
Zayniac   
Dec 29, 2008
Undergraduate / Theran And His Problem, and activity writing [5]

Theran and His Problem

Theran is an eight year old boy of the Weenusk First Nation, in Peawanuck, an Aboriginal community on the shores of Hudson's Bay, on the far reaches of Northern Ontario. Unlike other boys of his age in cities such as Toronto, Theran is barely able to write the most basic of sentences, and is hardly able to read. My eyes were opened to the problem of illiteracy in Canadian Aboriginal communities this past summer through my involvement with the Lieutenant Governor's Aboriginal Summer Reading Camps program, run by Frontier College. As part of the program, I was one of two administrators, and one of six counsellors for the camp in Peawanuck, Ontario. As a member of the only team of high school students, I and five other students went to the community to run the literacy camp for children aged five to sixteen. In the week of training which we received before going to the community, I learned how serious the problem of illiteracy is on the reserves - Aboriginal children are on average five years behind their counterparts in metropolitan elementary schools. I personally feel motivated to help alleviate the problem. As I have been fortunate enough to be in a family that has always encouraged reading, and have been privileged enough to have the means to properly learn how to read and write, and access a library that has all the reading materials I could ever want, I feel that it is my duty to help those who are not as fortunate. Having been to Peawanuck, and interacted with fifty different children with varying levels of ability, I was able to see that the problem is not one that can be solved in only one summer, but one that needs constant work, so that the children who need help can continually improve. Through running the camp I was also able to form connections with these children, spurring me to want to take further action against the problem of Aboriginal illiteracy.

Making sure that the Aboriginal children's literary skills are up to scratch is the fundamental first step to helping children in isolated communities gain an equal footing to their non-Aboriginal peers. The ability to read and write enable a child to successfully manage their school career, through university, ultimately allowing them to be both educated, and have a good job. While literacy may be taken for granted by most, it is important to realize that on the reserves, primary school teachers quite often do not live on the reservation, and many times change from year to year. This leaves the children of the schools with inconsistent schooling, as new teachers are not aware of what has already been taught, particularly in Peawanuck. As such, many of the children which I talked to came to dislike their teacher, and look forward to the time when they could learn from a new teacher. Many of the problems seen in Aboriginal communities, such as drug abuse, suicides, and unemployment, can be alleviated in the long run simply through children gaining the basic literacy skills which they need to succeed in life. With these skills, children, and later adults, will have greater self esteem, reducing the number of suicide cases, and ensuring the children's success in the future, as well as allowing the children to become educated about the risks that drug use entails.

The final importance of this issue comes in the power of these literacy skills to educate. This comes first through those who help improve the situation; for example, once the school year began, the whole team gave a presentation to our high school about the community of Peawanuck, and of the problem of illiteracy in these communities. The power of literacy comes also in the ability of the children who are now better able to communicate, who can now teach others about the problem of illiteracy in their communities.

And my short writing about one activity:

The last two years I have been a member of my school's Varsity Football team. As a player in the Defensive Back unit, I primarily played Cornerback, sometimes playing Safety and Halfback. While in my first year, the team did not have a very successful season, it was this feeling of loss that brought the team closer together, and better prepared us for the next year. The extent to which our team improved was clearly demonstrated by us finishing third in the league. Being a part of the football team did not just include simply putting on a bucket and equipment every day for practice - when I joined the team, I had my family grow by fifty brothers, an unrivalled experience. I felt that I grew with the team, as I first became entrenched in thinking like a football player then, with a new coach, gained better technical skills.
Zayniac   
Dec 29, 2008
Undergraduate / Supplement for Common App (Boston University is the door) [2]

the last parent is a bit disjunctional
i dunno how you mmight fix it other than integrating it where you talk about how california is diff both culturally and geographically - i think that would work
Zayniac   
Dec 29, 2008
Undergraduate / Eating pizza with a pair of chopsticks; culture difference, personal interest [22]

Fortunately, there is Google
I'd change that to fortunately there is the INTERNET
Dunno, just a thought, to get away from all the company names...
This thing's amazing though!
the next sentence GLOBAL warming (dunno if somebobdy already picked up on that) with no the before global
and RUBIK'S CUBE, not rubies cube (not rubics cube, as said earlier)
then i think this might be better: I hope my college will be a place like this too.
and...my favourite website, with many pictures that I cherish, sound better to my ear.
i dunno about the imagines either, lol...

Could somebody please please read my BU supplement?? I haven't got a single repsonse, other than myself!
Thanks a lot.
Zayniac   
Dec 30, 2008
Undergraduate / BU UNI Supplement - Why BUÉÉ + Why Program! [3]

Students consider many different factors when applying to college. Briefly discuss who or what influcenced your decision to apply to Boston University.

My first brush with Boston University came when my guidance counsellor suggested that BU was an ideal fit for my interests in the field .When a representative from the university came to visit my school, Upper Canada College, I became even more interested in what the university had to offer me, and these two steps were my diving board into the Boston University universe. From my initial plunge, I began to realize more and more that Boston University was my perfect match.

Boston University fits me (like a flipper?) in more ways than one. The first is perhaps the most important - the program. Ever since I was ten, I have been fascinated by the different methods of advertising, and its effects on what we/people buy, and how we think about certain products. In this light, Boston University's Department of Mass Communication, Advertising & Public Relations is my ideal program. With modules such as Persuasion and Public Opinion, and Design in Communication, Boston University is the one university with the program that seems custom-made to my interests.

Swimming deeper into the lake of information about Boston University and its surroundings, I also came to realize that the city of Boston is the foremost city where I could see myself spending the next four years of my life - if not more. I have always considered Boston Toronto's cousin in the south. Though I will never like the Red Sox, in my research I realized the vibrant and diverse nature of Boston reminded me of Toronto, yet was different enough that the upcoming years will be fresh and exciting, with an entire unique city at my feet ready to be explored.

Each time, after swimming to the surface after researching, I realize how much time as inadvertently passed - time which I have never regretted spending. The research has made it clearer to me the opportunities that Boston University holds for me, with academics, internships, and more. With a great program to look forward to, I can't wait to take my first steps into the ocean of Boston University this fall!

What experiences have led you to select your professional field and objective?

Advertising has always fascinated me. Ever since I was ten years old, I would look at billboard advertisements; observe their design, notice when they changed, and the general patterns which flickered throughout the city. I always made sure to keep my bemused parents abreast of the changes in the advertisement on the billboard at our closest intersection, and even observed how when one company in a particular field started advertising, all its rivals did too. I noticed back then how prevalent beer advertisements quickly became, and the use of scantily clad models - much to my own bemusement. Since then, my interests have expanded to other forms of advertising, such as television commercials, and product placements. My interest in television commercials began when I started to learn about film in grade eight. As I learned the tricks of the video camera, and the different techniques that film makers used, I began to look for these in the commercials which I saw on television, and from watching them, learned how the techniques could be employed to create an alluring end product

It was the love of both films and advertising which finally had me study movies to see not only the different camera effects used, but also how advertising was integrated into these films. I started to notice the different product placements in movies, and how these affected my thoughts about those products. Even just recently, for example, when I saw the movie, I realized that through the protagonist of the movie using an Apple iPod, my own thoughts of iPods became more favourable.

All my experiences, ever since I started to observe billboard advertisements seven years ago, have geared me towards wanting to learn as much as I can about the advertising field, and to go into advertising. To be able to have such a large impact on people is a privilege - and it my objective to go into the field of advertising not only to sell products, but to do so in a way that consumers find enjoyable. My objective is also to study with the department of Mass Communication, Advertising & Public Relations at Boston University - as through all my research, it is the single program which seems at once the most relevant to my interests, and the most interesting, period.
Zayniac   
Dec 30, 2008
Undergraduate / Theran And His Problem, and activity writing [5]

Thanks Sean!
...Especially since you read so many haha
Yup, I've mdae that change.

I was unsire about this though...
Making sure that the Aboriginal children's literacy skills are at the same level as other Canadian children's
should it be apostrophe s at the end?

do you any suggestions? i'm not sure how else to put it haha

oh and and has great difficulty reading
or is hardly able to read?

And...do you think the way it is writtena bove is better ot his way?
As one of two administrators and six counsellors for the Lieutenant Governor's Aboriginal Summer Reading Camps program this past summer, my eyes were opened to the problem of illiteract in Canadian Aboriginal communities. Run by Frontier College, this program enabled five students and I to run a literacy camp for the children of the Weenusk First Nation community in Peawanuck, Ontraio. In the week of training we received prior to departing forr Peawanuck, I learned the seriousness of illiteracy on the reservations - Aboriginal children's rate of literacy is on/AN average OF five years behind their counterparts in metropolitan elementerary schools. Being fortunate enough to have the means to properly read and write, and to live in a family that has always encouraged reading, I feel that it is my duty to help those who are not as fortunate, and I feel prersonally motivated to help those who are not as fotunate, and I feel personally motivated to help alleviate the problem of illiteracy in Canadian Aboriginal communities. Through interacting with fifty different children with varying levels of ability, I was able to better comprehend the complexity of the problem of illiteracy. This problem cannot be solved in one summer alone. It will require constant dedicated work for the continual improvement of the Aboriginal children.

WHich one do you think?
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