Writing Feedback / IELTS : Some people think that it is important to use leisure time for activities [4]

Subject: Some people think that it is important to use leisure time for activities that improve the mind, such as reading and doing word puzzles. Other people feel that it is important to rest the mind during the leisure time. Discuss both views

There are two schools of thought on whether leisure time should be used in self-improvement or it should be used as a time to rest your mind.

The first set of people who argues that leisure time should be used for leisure, feels that brain need some resting time and leisure time is the time for that. Nothing like an ideal mind to keep you recharged. They feel that they are overloaded with work in their day to day life. If they end up using their leisure time for some learning activities, it will be too taxing on their brain. People go on a short break or a long vacation to give their non-stop brain a resting time. After a good break or a long vacation people come back charged up, ready to work hear till the next break. To work or learn something new during leisure time defects the very purpose of the leisure time.

The other school of thought is 'ideal mind is devils workshop'. When the mind is ideal, random thoughts passes your mind and most of them would be useless ones. Like it or not human brain cannot be kept idea. So that best way to make keep the braining from going to those useless thought is to engage it. During normal working hours, people hardly have time for themselves. There is hardly any time to indulge in some creative thinking and doing something they really love to do. Leisure time is the best time to find ones interest and discover self.

In conclusion, there is nothing wrong in both ways of thinking. If someone feels that keeping the mind for some time is the best thing to do, it's the best thing. On the other hand nothing wrong in engaging ones brain during leisure time.

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I am appearing for IELTS exam next month. I need a band 7 or more. Please have a look at my essay and suggest if anything.

Thank you for your support

Graduate / IELTS : In some countries, people who are unemployed receive a sum of money each [2]

"In some countries, people who are unemployed receive a sum of money each week in the form of benefit. While some support this, other people believe that this money should not be given"

There are countries those hands out some money to its citizen who are unemployed. Some believe that money should not be given but other believes that government should take care of their citizen.

The monetary support given by government is to help its citizen so that they can take care of their basic requirement. There is an obligation on the government to take care of people in need. In today's world many people find hard to find a job and in such situation if the government do not take care of its own citizen, it will break down the social structure. People might indulge in crime to meet their basic necessity. By providing support to its people, it gives a change to its people to sustain themselves and think of a long term solution.

Though the monetary support might help its people, it's not the solution for creating a vibrant country. The government needs to think of creating job and infrastructure for the people to get job. It needs to create an economy where employment requirement is sufficient for one to find a job. It should not hide its incapability in creating jobs by handing out small benefits to people. There will be a section of people who would tend to look only for government hand-outs rather than trying to achieve long term prosperity.

In conclusion, government do need to take care of its citizen and have responsibility towered its citizen, they should also think of creating an economy where there is job for people. Handing out benefit should be for a limited period of time, so that people really try hard to get a job.