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Posts by joylabx
Name: Joy Labos
Joined: Oct 6, 2013
Last Post: Oct 16, 2013
Threads: 3
Posts: 4  
From: Philippines

Displayed posts: 7
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joylabx   
Oct 6, 2013
Writing Feedback / IELTS; People who have committed a crime should always be in jail ? [4]

In some countries, people who commit less serious crimes are made to undertake community service instead of a prison sentence. Some people believe that all people who have committed a crime should be sent to prison. Do you agree or disagree?

Every nation has set laws for the citizens to abide and failure to do so may result to corresponding punishment depending on its severity. However, arguments have been made that all types of crimes being violated should be directly sent to prison, as will now be discussed.

On the positive not, subjecting violators to be immediately sent to prison, whether the crime committed may be heinous or not, can create a sense of fear. This type of fear will be beneficial to the community since the people will be very vigilant not to defy the regulations set by the government. A dread feeling of being immediately sent to jail can invoke the people to religiously abide the rules. As a result, crime rates would decline.

Moreover, this type of punishment can build up a sense of patriotism. For example, most lows set by the administration promote the betterment of one's nation thus when followed, eventually builds up every citizen's love for the nation.

On the downside, violators that may have committed crimes that are not grave such as jaywalking or improper disposal of garbage may feel that it is quite unfair. Instead, they should be subjected lesser punishments such as doing services for the community or be given fines.

In addition, mixing all types of prisoners can create a greater problem when those prisoners who committed serious crimes will influence those violators with lesser severity into committing major crimes.

Overall, I disagree that people should no abruptly send to jail but as an alternative should be dealt with according to is grievousness.
joylabx   
Oct 16, 2013
Writing Feedback / Man's Best Friend and Medicine; ESSAY ON ANIMAL THERAPY [4]

One cannot deny that when used animal-assisted therapy it in many ways causes patients to heal more efficiently.

One cannot deny that when using animal-assisted therapy on patients, causes them to heal more efficiently.
joylabx   
Oct 16, 2013
Writing Feedback / IELTS; Schools should provide practical knowledge and skills to students [4]

Some people think that school children need to learn practical skills such as car maintenance or bank account management along with the academic subjects at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Most of our schools today have curriculum that teaches normally academic subjects to the children rather than practical skills. It is disagreed that these kids should not be trained with skills such as car maintenance or bank account management in schools. Analyzing the importance of subjects traditionally taught in school as compared to practical skills and timetables are already full with academic subjects will be discussed.

Firstly, subjects such as Science, Math, English, History and Social Studies are considered to be a vital knowledge to equip the children in today's competitive world. For instance, when these children would be finding jobs, huge corporations, generally, have assessment tests that require problem solving skills, language ability and a wide range of knowledge globally. Unfortunately, skills such as learning how to fix a car or being able to manage your finances are rarely required. Thus this makes it clear that lessons in academic subjects should still be the main priority in schools today.

Secondly, there are already a lot of academic subjects mandatory for these children to learn in school, hence, squeezing in practical subjects may becoming too exhausting for the kids. For example, children would feel drained when being compelled to become skilled at fixing a car after a lengthy Math test. In addition, learning how to manage one's finances is something that people eventual learn along as they go through life and most individuals are excellent in doing so without being taught in schools. Thus it becomes quite evident that practical skills will not be qualified to becoming a subject in schools today.

In conclusion, it is imperative to note that academic subjects are more essential for the children of today to be equipped in economical world and integrating practical skills in schools will be inconvenient for the children as a result of their hectic schedule.
joylabx   
Oct 16, 2013
Writing Feedback / TOEFL Government is not necessary since we can redress many problems by our own. [5]

First and foremost , we humanbeings have been trough a lot from the natural disease

Firstly, human beings have been exposed to a lot of natural diseases.

and new disease always here no matter how complete the bio-technique is.

maybe you can write
New types of diseases continue to evolve even though with the advancement of biotechnology.
joylabx   
Oct 16, 2013
Writing Feedback / IELTS - Do the benefits of globalization outweigh the drawbacks? [2]

It has been said that the world is becoming a global village in which there are no boundaries to trade and communication. Do the benefits of globalisation outweigh the drawbacks?

The growth of telecommunications has paved the way for people access to international world views, medical knowledge as well as foreign trade. This has become very favourable especially with regards to a country's economy. However, there has been a growing debate whether there are more negative aspects of globalisation rather than positive ones.

On a positive note, globalisation can greatly bolster one's economic growth through foreign trade and open doors to international business. As a result, this creates opportunities for employment, not just locally but internationally as well, along with encouraging multi-million dollar companies to invest in less developed countries. An American company such as McDonald's, for instance, are opening nearly everywhere in the globe consequently promoting local jobs. In addition, consumers also benefit from globalisation as merchandise are being traded quickly through the latest technology, wherein these goods are now sold at a cheaper price.

On the downside, as huge companies are now building their factories in developing countries primarily because of lesser wages, this may cause increase in unemployment rate in industrialized countries. Furthermore, this will amplify environmental problems of the less developed countries because of the factory waste of these companies and the usage of natural resources. Moreover, as goods become increasing easy to trade between countries, it has also become evident that animal and plant disease to spread more rapidly.

In conclusion, I believe that as there are advantages to the effects of globalisation these are being outweighed by the disadvantages. I suggest that there should be a meeting between leaders of industrialized companies and make sure that all countries should profit from globalisation.
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