Graduate / One page essay explaining interest to attend a professional workshop on modeling [3]

Hi there, I am applying to a workshop on modeling in my research area. Please help me revise my essay, any suggestions and comments are welcomed! Thanks.

"1 page essay explaining your interest in the workshop and possible science questions you would like to address. "

workshop in atmospheric modeling

Dear Admission Committee:
My name is XXX, I am a first year PhD student in the YYY University. I work with Professor ZZZ on EE chemistry using VVV model.

During Master's course, I studied on the development of instrumentation for online measurements of ambient trace gas pollutants like FFF. While the importance of observations and field studies cannot be underestimate in atmospheric sciences, I am more curious in the processes that drive changes in air composition, and how these processes can be parameterized in models. Numerical modeling makes it possible to understand the complex coupling between these processes, and to make detailed connections between theory and observations. Motivated by my curiosity on the chemical mechanisms, transportation, emission and deposition of pollutants, I decided to transit my research focus into modeling during my doctoral study.

My research topic is to examine GGG variance over preindustrial-industrial and glacial-interglacial timescales, and to investigate the implications for tropospheric chemistry and climate. Specifically, there are two scientific questions I am interested in: What are the biggest drivers for the variance in GG abundance over the two important climate timescales? What are the potential implications for the oxidizing capacity of the atmosphere and short-lived climate forcing agents CH4, tropospheric O3, and aerosols? I will conduct the research through adding GG sources and chemistry schemes in VVV model, and evaluating CC proxies.

As a beginner of modeling studies, a fully understanding of the model structures and how specific processes are represented in models is the first step. The initial part of my research work is to improve the model performance by implement new chemical schemes. This includes multi-phase reactions of GG in snow and sea ice at polar areas, and the formation and transportation of sea salt aerosol, since they act as an important source of GG. Therefore, a systematic training on fundamentals of atmospheric chemistry and aerosol modeling is a perfect opportunity for me to build a solid background for my future study.

Through the lectures offered by the workshop and interactive exercises, I hope to gain a clearer understanding of model studies, and furtherly hone my skills in model works. I will also gain a broader perspective on models across different scales (box models, regional models and global models), understanding the advantages and disadvantages of these models, which will help me choose an appropriate model to suit various research objectives. Last but not least, the workshop offers an exceptional opportunity to network with not only renowned atmospheric scientists, but also peer students, postdocs, early career professors and researchers in the field across the country.

I look forward to attending this workshop, to sharing and communicating with scientists in atmospheric modeling. I sincerely hope you will consider my application favorably.

Graduate / Scholarly and research area(s) of interest, experiences that led to your preparation in the field [21]

This is the prompt. I can understand every single sentence of it and I wrote one or more paragraphs to each sentence. What confuses me is how long should I go with each answer? And which part is more important, that is, I should describe more about? And how should I arrange different answers together to make the whole essay a consistent one?

Please state your purpose in ...

Here's how I categorize these prompts:

Please state your purpose in applying for graduate study:
Here I state briefly that my research interest, my willingness to conduct independent research work, and my career goal motivate me to pursue PhD study. It is a small paragraph, about 4 rows (44 words).

Describe your scholarly and research area(s) of interest:
I describe my research interest, and give two specific areas I am especially interested in.(49 words)

Experiences that contributed to your preparation in the field:
Briefly describe experiences that have prepared you for advanced study or research, and provide any additional information that may aid the selection committee in evaluating your preparation and aptitude for graduate study at UCLA.

I know it says "briefly", but I wrote 217 words to show I am prepared in this field in two way:
1. Background knowledge through course work and literature review
2. Research/project experience on XXX topic.
I've only described my experience, should I add how these experience should facilitate my future study? Like what skills did I learn from these experience?

I think this is an ample paragraph because this is where I could show my qualifications and aptitude.

your plans for your future occupation or profession
My previous experience has sparked my passion for achieving better understanding on the unknown part in atmospheric chemistry, through original research by instrumentation development, controlled laboratory experiments, field observations and numerical models. I want to pursue a career in academia as a research scientist or a professor in this area. Eventually, I hope to make my own contributions to atmospheric science, helping sharpen our scientific "visibility" in the air.(69 words)

If you are applying for a research masters or doctoral program, you are encouraged to indicate specific research interests and potential faculty mentors.
Here I indicate some specific faculty's name and their research, say that my research interest aligns with theirs and I deeply admire their work, want to be a contributive part in their team, etc.(94 words)

Now I've got all the materials the prompt asked, how should I tailor and arrange these materials to make a systematic, coherent essay? If you have any suggestions, whether it's about the whole structure, or each answers, please tell me. Thank you very much!

Graduate / Personal History Statement - my pursuit of higher education in environmental science [16]

As a first generation college student, my pursuit of higher education in environmental science is not as smooth as my interest developed in this area. The sympathy for people suffering in heavily polluted China, the experience in popularization of scientific knowledge, and the enthusiasm for atmospheric research has shaped my path to be an environmentalist and academic researcher.

I was born in XX, a city once reported by TIME Magazine as one of the world's most polluted places. Severe air pollution, mainly due to expanding coal industry, have threatened the residents' health with increasing rate of respiratory and cardiovascular diseases. When I was in high school, one of my best friends had to suspend her schooling because of asthma, and the doctor believed it was partly caused by the dirty air. I was truly upset then and decided that I want to do something to mitigate the situation. Therefore, I chose environmental science as my major in college, hoping to help improve the air quality of my hometown one day so that there would be fewer and fewer people suffering from pollution of whatever kind.

My interests in math and chemistry since high school facilitated my study in college. Furthermore, participation in several environmental activities with non-governmental organizations (i.e. NGOs or non-profits) ignited my enthusiasm for environmental issues. These interests continued and were stronger as I graduated from college.

Unfortunately I have gapped three years before I went to graduate school. When I was preparing to advance my education after college, my father had a heart attack. He took a surgery and after one week in the ICU, he came out extremely vulnerable. I was so worried about him that after one night's ponderation, I decided to stay at home taking care of him, instead of going to graduate school. Since my father's not working after surgery, I worked as an accountant in a trading company to help support my family.

I didn't enjoy working with payrolls and taxes, yet there's no environment-related company or institution in a small city like my hometown. But that cannot stop my enthusiasm. I started a public platform on WeChat (a social software like MSN), as a way to popularize environmental knowledge to ordinary people. The platform shared basic knowledge about air and water pollution, recent acts and regulations limiting pollutants' emission, fun facts concerning climate change and biosphere, and practical eco-friendly tips in daily life. I tried my best to make scientific results more easily accepted by nonprofessional people, hoping to promote environmental awareness among the masses.

Originally I assumed the readers would mainly be high school students. However, one day when I visit my grandma, I found my platform was quite popular among housewives in her community. It was that time when I realized, there are more people who are curious about our planet and environmental protection than I thought. What is missing is just a bridge between professional terms and daily language.

Even though the accounting job is well-paid, and I was offered a big promotion by the company, somehow it constantly reminded me that it was not something I enjoyed as a career. I was more fulfilled to receive one comment on my We-chat platform than to accomplish a challenging task at work successfully. Three years later, my father was totally recovered and went back to work. As my family's economic status are much more stable, I immediately quit the job, returned to graduate school to continue my dream of pursuing a career as an environmental scientist.

It was during Master's study that I accomplished the transition from a general environmental enthusiast to a professional researcher. My academic interests in instrumentation and atmospheric science are able to form and blossom through coursework and my own research experience.

I developed an instrument for monitoring ambient pollutants (for details please refer the Statement of Purpose). I still remember the excitement when the first peak appeared on the screen, indicating the device, which I made out of scratch, could successfully detect trace level species. Fascinated by advanced instruments since then, I became familiar with other commercialized equipment for chemical analysis of atmospheric samples, like XX,XX,XX, etc. The more I learned, the more my passion grew, and the accumulating knowledge in turn sparked many new ideas about my own instrumentation process.

More and more often, I find myself working at leisure time, from well-equipped lab to cold, empty containers (while we are on campaigns), testing and improving the instruments. Not because I have to, but because I enjoy the feeling of devoting myself to something I am truly enchanted with. I finally find my career.

Although there are several setbacks along the way, I am proud of the person I have become: a self-motivated female who have worked full time to support her family, and continue, with headlong resolution,to pursue her dream as an environmental scientist. I strongly believe my personality, academic interests and experience will enable me to serve as a contributive part in improving China's environment, through academic achievements and endeavor in popularization of science to ordinary people.