Unanswered [6] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by nisapk20
Name: Anggun Puspita Khoirun Nisa
Joined: Nov 23, 2018
Last Post: Nov 30, 2018
Threads: -
Posts: 2  
Likes: 1
From: Indonesia
School: Universitas Indonesia

Displayed posts: 2
sort: Latest first   Oldest first
nisapk20   
Nov 30, 2018
Graduate / The Personal Statement for USC Annenberg School, the Master of Communication Management [3]

Hi Mako Zhang, I am not an english native speaker as well but I will try my best to give some insightful comments for your PS.

1. In the fist sentence on second paragraph, I think its better to not using interrogative sentence. Maybe you can change the sentence to this following: I choose to pursue my master study in Annenberg because the curriculum setting of the program is unique. It is contain _______ which I am passionate about. (feel free to change the words if you wish :)

2. In the second prompts you said that: I am interested in digital marketing and innovative internet product development. Exploring the demand of potential consumers, communicating with them, developing a creative product, and finally making profits, they are what I enjoyed most.

In my opinion you should elaborate more on why you interested in digital marketing? Does it only because of your passion? What kind of contribution that you will bring by mastering those skills? I still didn't get the idea for why you need to pursue a master degree in communication besides it is because your passion and interest.

3. In terms of grammar, I found some ineffective sentence but I am afraid that I am not capable enough to give some comments about it. Goodluck!
nisapk20   
Nov 26, 2018
Undergraduate / A plan to pursue academic interests at USC, address your first and second-choice major selections [3]

Hi Hannah,
I think your essay above did not answer the required prompt. Maybe you can start with doing some careful research about the programme you are applying to and reading carefully about their programme structure (I hope it is available in the website). I think if you have understand the programme's content, it would be easier for you to answer the question for why you want to study in the USC in the first place.

Another comment for your opening sentence, It is better to paraphrase the sentence so that it did not contains any negative sentiments (i.e : The frustration of disliking what ...)

And trying to maximise the world limit up to 250 words and make sure you already put all your ideas in. Good luck! :)
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳