Writing Feedback / TOEIC- What are the advantages and disdvantages of teenagers having jobs? [3]

Pros and Cons of Teens Working

In my opinion, a great number of people forbid their children to have a part-time job when they are studying at school. They think is bad for children.

First of all, people think that children have to focus on their academy and at that time studying is the most important thing to them. If they go to work, they may neglect their homework and get a bad grade. Even, they will give up going to school.

In my experience, when I was a high school student, I didn't have a part-time job. Therefore, after school, I always did my homework and prepared for the test. At school, I could focus on the lessons and also got great a grade on an exam. However, I had a classmate who always slept on in classes and seldom done his homework. At first, I thought he must be a bad student and played all the time. Suddenly, I found that he had a part-time job every day and also on weekends. Because of the job, he didn't have too much to sleep and study. When I asked him why he could not study hard now and then he could get more money in the future. He told me that his family needed a lot of money so he had to do this.

According to this experience, although many people think having a job will affect students' homework, some children have to earn money. Otherwise, they do not have money to live and finish studying. Nevertheless, there are still some advantages. If you go to work, you would understand how the world is and perhaps find what you really want to do. At that time, you will know more and more people who you never meet at school. Perhaps, they will help you someday. That's why my college professors always call us to find some internship.

Above all, we know that having a job may increase our working experience, earning money and make some friends. However, it may affect to students' homework.

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Writing Feedback / Why sports are important to people? TOIEC Writing [2]

people like to exercise

Nowadays more and more people like to play sports. Some people like to go jogging, play basketball as well as go to a gym and so on. There are some reasons why people like to exercise. First of all, exercising is healthy. You must have heard somebody saying that you have to exercise more than thirty minutes and even more than three times in a week. I think this saying is right. When I was a little girl, I often had a fever. Therefore, my mother told me to join the school volleyball team to make me stronger. When I began to play volleyball, I seldom got sick. Also, I was stronger than most of the children. Secondly, if you are stressful, you can play sports. It can help you release most of the stress and make you calm down. For example, when my sister was preparing the big exam, she was so nervous that she got a stomachache. She began to jog every night and then she felt better after exercising. Last but not least, sports can make you keep in good shape. Now, because we eat lots of junk food, more and more people are getting fatter. Then, we have to exercise to lose weight. Even many people will go to the gym for training the beautiful muscle. I have a friend who was a fat boy and hated to play sports. One time, he wanted to make a friend with a cute girl. That girl refused him and told him that he was ugly because he was too fat. She didn't want to have a fat friend. According to this experience, my friend made the decision to lose weight. After one year, he lost his weight, becoming a handsome guy and made many friends. Above all, I think playing sports is important to us. We have to exercise to become healthier, release your stress and keep in a good shape.