Posts by Thaophuoc

Thaophuoc

Sep 26, 2019

Writing Feedback / Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions [2]

"generally accepted"
"tourists" remember the "s"
"Aim of visiting..."
Just write " Therefore, the increase in ticket prices for foreign visitors is essential..."
"It allows the authorities to allocate... and create... for to attract overseas visitors"
"Having said that,"
Remember to check your grammar carefully
Just some of my fix, please take a look at my essay 😉

Thaophuoc

Sep 26, 2019

Writing Feedback / People attend colleges or universities for many different reasons (new experiences, career) [3]

"provide people with an ideal..."
"to get information from"
Let consider my sentence "Whereas, in universities and colleges, with the instruction of many qualified teachers and professors, who had abundant teaching experience, undergraduates are provided with plenty of new knowledge to tackle problems in their studies".

"Who do have university or college degrees..." You only use this way of emphasis in the Speaking part.
The summary: " ..., people may enroll in colleges and universities for different purposes.... No matter what their motivation is, studying....."
Just some of my fix, please have a look at my essay 😉

Thaophuoc

Sep 26, 2019

Writing Feedback / The birth, death and the population growths of Scotland in 1940 with projection towards 2020 [4]

demographic trends in Scotland

The line graph presents the birth, death and the population growths of Scotland in 1940 with projection towards 2020. The most prominent feature was that the country's population was on the steady decline since 1955 and stopped growing all together by around the mid 2000s.

The birth rate of Scotland dropped from 2.5% in 1940 and never returned to that mark ever since. Except for two brief periods of very modest recovery (1945-1950, 1965-1968), The country's birth rate plunged to roughly 1% in 1960. Since the 70s, the birth rate of Scotland was on a continuing downward trend to well below 1% around the 2010s. The trend is forecast to remain unchanged towards 2020.

The death rate of Scotland declined from 1.5% in 1940 and leveled off at approximately 0.5% since 1955. In 2010, this feature witnesses a slow increase and is expected to follow an upward trend toward the end of the period.

The figure for population growth of Scotland reached it's peak at 1.5% in 1955 after undergoing a notable drop to 0.5% in 1945. Since then, the proportion fell significantly over many next decades until hitting a trough and stopped growing by around the mid 2000s.

----------I'm grateful for your help -----------