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Posts by thingoc [Suspended]
Name: Ngoc
Joined: Feb 12, 2020
Last Post: Feb 12, 2020
Threads: 1
Posts: 3  
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From: Viet Nam
School: University of Languages and International Studies

Displayed posts: 4
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thingoc   
Feb 12, 2020
Writing Feedback / Reducing traffic accidents by penalizing drivers? [IELTS WRITING TASK 2] [5]

Some people think that strict punishments for driving offences are the key to reducing traffic accidents. Others, however, believe that other measures would be more effective in improving road safety.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.



Some people support that strict punnishments for driving crimes play a vital role in reducing traffic accidents. In contrast, other individuals espouse the idea that other measures would be more effecive in enhancing road safety. Both sides have, of course, their own merits, I think the first view is more resonable and this essay aims to prove my claim.

First and foremost, strict punishments force habitants to follow right regulations. In other words, punishments have a direct influence on citizens' benefits, which is a good way to improve their awarenesses. For instance, according to Vietnamese governemtn's regulation, drivers having the level of acohols in their body will be punished more than 10,000,000 vnd, which is considered as a big ammount of money. As a result, this rule has an impact on the consumption of acohols drinks as well as helps to dicrease traffice accidents significantly.

On the other hand, other measures such as the quality of road and, of course, would be effective ways to improve road safety. There is no doubt that the quality of road also has a lot of influences on road stafety. As roof, it is proved that wet surface of the road is considered as a cause resulting in a number of traffic accidents in comparision with the good quality of road. However, I still support myself that improving people's awarenesses that strict punnishments are key factors will bring more positive results to reduce traffic accidents.

In conclusion, it is no denied the importance of other methods, the quality of road for example is a good ways to promote road safety. On the contrary, I firmly believe that strict publishments are main factors to reduce traffic problems.
thingoc   
Feb 12, 2020
Writing Feedback / [IELTS WRITING TASK 2] Pros & Cons Technology affects Social relationship [7]

I have some comments for your writing as followings:
Good points
- The structure of the eassy is clear and easy to follow.
- It is used a wide variety of vocabulary and linking words
Improved points
- You should mention examples in your writing
Good luck!
thingoc   
Feb 12, 2020
Writing Feedback / Ielts task 2. In recent years, people are likely to live alone instead of starting a family [5]

In my opinion, you should learn how to develop a paragraph better. For example, In the second paragraph "In some nations, many people may prefer pursuing their career to getting married. Personally, it is beneficial to set up home on their own When more and more people decide to live independently,..." so it is expected to develop why people prefer to pursue their carreer instead of getting married. However, you mention about aspects about the benefits of getting married.

I hope it will help you.
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