Zavy
Mar 31, 2020
Graduate / "Three aspects'" - Self introduction for master's degree interview [4]
@Holt
Thank you for the advice! I'll try to revise it.
@Holt
Thank you for the advice! I'll try to revise it.
Zavy
Mar 31, 2020
Writing Feedback / Learning online is sometimes a necessity: the pros and cons [3]
Hello Diem, in my view, you have done a good job, except for several sentences to be polished.
1. "it is undeniable ...." could be replaced by "it's undeniable that several benefits will be created by this trend, as well as some drawbacks."
2. "the greatest ...", in this sentence, the subject of "enhance ..." should be students, not advantage. So you may change it to "the greatest advantage for students is they will be able to enhance their ability of self-study."
3. "It is of significant, ..." has two which in one sentence, and "of significant" is wrong. You could replace it by "As a useful learning method which plays a major role in expanding knowledge, it's of paramount significance."
4. "They would (...) pleasant feelings.", the two sentences are started by "they", so you may change it to "Without sitting in front of their teacher and feeling fully strained, they could learn in their favorite place with a bright and pleasant feeling."
5. "Despite a few ..." would be better by writing like this, "Despite a few flaws that still exists, I'm firmly convinced that learning online holds a bright future for us."
Next time you could use more junctions, like "as far as I concerned", "moreover", "when it comes to" and so on, they would make your article better.
I hope my advice could help you. :)
Hello Diem, in my view, you have done a good job, except for several sentences to be polished.
1. "it is undeniable ...." could be replaced by "it's undeniable that several benefits will be created by this trend, as well as some drawbacks."
2. "the greatest ...", in this sentence, the subject of "enhance ..." should be students, not advantage. So you may change it to "the greatest advantage for students is they will be able to enhance their ability of self-study."
3. "It is of significant, ..." has two which in one sentence, and "of significant" is wrong. You could replace it by "As a useful learning method which plays a major role in expanding knowledge, it's of paramount significance."
4. "They would (...) pleasant feelings.", the two sentences are started by "they", so you may change it to "Without sitting in front of their teacher and feeling fully strained, they could learn in their favorite place with a bright and pleasant feeling."
5. "Despite a few ..." would be better by writing like this, "Despite a few flaws that still exists, I'm firmly convinced that learning online holds a bright future for us."
Next time you could use more junctions, like "as far as I concerned", "moreover", "when it comes to" and so on, they would make your article better.
I hope my advice could help you. :)
Zavy
Mar 31, 2020
Graduate / "Three aspects'" - Self introduction for master's degree interview [4]
Hello, everyone
I'm about to attend an interview for master's degree, and the following is my self-introduction. Please help me polish it and give your advice.
Thank you!
Dear professors, good morning! Thanks for giving me the honor to be here for this interview. My name is Zavy, I was born in Hefei, the capital of Anhui Province. Currently I am pursuing my bachelor's degree at Shandong University, majoring in Microelectronics Science and Engineering.
In the following, I will introduce myself in three aspects.
First, since I entered college four years ago, I have conducted many experiments in Microelectronics, which aroused my passion for this major. One of the most unforgettable experiments is a project I finished on my EDA class, when I saw it working on the development board, I felt great joy and wanted to learn more in this field. Then I realized that a bachelor's degree is not enough, so I chose to go further to achieve a master's degree in Microelectronics.
Second, during my learning in Quantum Mechanics, I wrote an essay titled Some Studies on the AdS/CFT Correspondence, trying to explain the origin, development and applications of a significant research in string theory. This article helped me gain some insights into the complete process of writing a paper, and prepared me for the future academic research.
Last but not least, I would like to devote myself to Chinese Microelectronics industry, but I know a postgraduate cannot contribute much in this large subject. Therefore, I just hope to work on a small field in it, such as Radio Frequency IC, MEMS and so on.
If I got the chance to achieve the master's degree here, I would spare no efforts to complete the courses, do researches and publish papers under the guidance of my supervisor.
That's all, thanks for your attention!
'I will introduce myself in three aspects'
Hello, everyone
I'm about to attend an interview for master's degree, and the following is my self-introduction. Please help me polish it and give your advice.
Thank you!
Dear professors, good morning! Thanks for giving me the honor to be here for this interview. My name is Zavy, I was born in Hefei, the capital of Anhui Province. Currently I am pursuing my bachelor's degree at Shandong University, majoring in Microelectronics Science and Engineering.
In the following, I will introduce myself in three aspects.
First, since I entered college four years ago, I have conducted many experiments in Microelectronics, which aroused my passion for this major. One of the most unforgettable experiments is a project I finished on my EDA class, when I saw it working on the development board, I felt great joy and wanted to learn more in this field. Then I realized that a bachelor's degree is not enough, so I chose to go further to achieve a master's degree in Microelectronics.
Second, during my learning in Quantum Mechanics, I wrote an essay titled Some Studies on the AdS/CFT Correspondence, trying to explain the origin, development and applications of a significant research in string theory. This article helped me gain some insights into the complete process of writing a paper, and prepared me for the future academic research.
Last but not least, I would like to devote myself to Chinese Microelectronics industry, but I know a postgraduate cannot contribute much in this large subject. Therefore, I just hope to work on a small field in it, such as Radio Frequency IC, MEMS and so on.
If I got the chance to achieve the master's degree here, I would spare no efforts to complete the courses, do researches and publish papers under the guidance of my supervisor.
That's all, thanks for your attention!
