Undergraduate / College teachers are not all the same. [7]

Hello everybody!
For the first time I feel like a fool! The reason is that I wrote an essay and give it to one teacher to revise it. He didn't like the essay at all and gave me millions of mistakes.

I scored nothing! I don't know why. I just want to make sure that my essay is really full of mistakes. Could you please revise it and I appreciate that.

Lastly, could you please tell me where is the weak points in my writing. Is it because we do not read a lot, or is it because we think in our native language?

Thank you in advance.

The essay that I wrote goes by:

College teachers

At my college, I always repeat the famous proverb which says: "as different as chalk and cheese." It actually represents the huge difference between my positive and negative teachers.

The first group, my positive teachers seem to be cooperative. They are always willing for questions and discussions in class. Dr. John Miles, my English professor, is a good example of a positive teacher. One day, I had a trouble with essay writing. The problem was about the coherence between paragraphs. Dr. Miles noticed that and started to help me. He took several hours of his own time teaching me how to tackle with it until I become better.

The second group, my negative teachers are unhelpful. They give lectures quickly and do not allow the students to ask. Once, when my colleagues and I were having some difficulties with understanding collocation, my English teacher, Dr. Sarah Smith, did not explain enough the combination of words together. I do remember that day when I asked her about the difference between" strict rule" and "rigid rule"; she become quite angry and answered me irritably!

Finally, I'm convinced that all teachers are not the same! So, when teachers are judged as positive, students learn better. No doubt that they are the best!

Writing Feedback / An essay about Building up our Immune System. [8]

Hello
This site is great! I admit that I was blindfolded due to the fact that I did not know this helpful site till now!
Anyway, I was wondering if you could help me in revising the next essay.
Thank you in advance

Building up our Immune System

The immune system is one of the most important systems in the human body. It protects us from many diseases; therefore, we should strengthen it as much as we can.

First, we have to eat healthy food. Eating well does not mean to gorge; it simply means that we have to manage our eating. Our daily meals should contain: vitamins, carbohydrates, fat, and minerals.

We also have to sleep well. The "good slumber" is the doctor's advice to their patients. "We always emphasize that sleeping early gives the body a high energy which helps to work greatly in the next day," said Dr. John Miles.

In conclusion, ignorance at times makes people careless to their immune system. So, it is necessary to take care of it. Indeed, it is the best way to avoid any infections that might attempt to attack our bodies.