Scholarship / Long and short term goals (to be a pharmacist) [NEW]

PROMPT: Discuss your short and long-term goals. Are some of them related? Which are priorities? Be specific in describing short and long-term goals you may have. Provide examples from any aspect of your life. In addition, if you have already accomplished some short or long-term goals you set for yourself in the past, you can discuss them.

As a little girl, I aspired to be the top surgeon-astronaut-lawyer-supermodel when I grew up. I was foolish and dreamt big. Yet to this day, I still set my goals high and continue to strive towards them. But my first priority was to focus on one career at a time. My desire to work in one of the most advanced and progressive fields sparked my passion for medicine. With first hand experience, of a family member whose life threatening condition was cured with the help of miraculous medicine, intensified my dedication. From there, I yearned for a career in pharmacy. I could not find anything more satisfying than dispensing potentially life saving medication to the sick and ailing. At that moment, I realized I was destined to become a pharmacist.

Only in my wildest dreams could I imagine myself graduating from Pharmacy College; but as my own high school graduation looms nearer, I am one step closer to living me dream. Being able to obtain my Pharm.D. degree has become my long-term goal.

In order to accomplish this goal, I have set many short-term goals to prepare myself to endure hardships and overcome challenges. The first goal that takes top priority is to maintain my path to be valedictorian. Besides earning straight A's, I wanted to prepare myself for college by taking advanced and college courses throughout high school. Even though it is stressful at times, I have learned the meaning of diligence and perseverance.

Another goal I wish to fulfill is to be accepted into OSU's ( I didn't abbreviate this on the essay) College of Pharmacy Early Admissions Program. By surpassing the requirements for minimum grade point average and SAT score, I am eligible to apply. Being eligible is just one of the obstacles I need to conquer for entrance into this rigorous program. My essays and academic record will carry me through the rest of the hurdles.

All my academic short term goals stem from my dream to become a pharmacist. Although the path I set is demanding, I believe nothing can obstruct me from pursuing my dream.

Any suggestions are greatly appreciated! Thank you!

Scholarship / Gates-unfair situation- I had a voice and I wanted it to be heard. [3]

Briefly describe a situation in which you thought you or others were treated unfairly or were not given an opportunity you thought you deserved. Why do you think this happened? How did you respond? Did the situation improve as a result of your response? Explain why you thought the situation was unfair, why you thought your way of responding would make a difference and whether it did.

Hi! This is an excerpt from my essay that I would love for some help on editing. It's the longest paragraph of my entire essay and I wanted to shorten it up a bit. Thank you for your help!

I put up with excuse after excuse from him even if it meant I had to forego social activities. "...families spend Saturdays together...I don't know her parents...you have Sunday school the next day...don't you have to study for a test?" Finally a friend's fourteenth birthday slumber party was my turning point. She was my closet friend at school. When she handed out her sleepover invitations, I felt obligated to attend because I was her best friend. Weeks in advance I had already purchased her present, so I had no doubt in my mind that I would attend. My dad, on the other hand, had the opposite thought. From the moment I asked for his permission to go, I was immediately met with another lecture about family responsibilities. This time I was not willing to back down. I countered every argument he gave with a compromise. I would complete every chore and homework assignment before I left. What made him uncomfortable with the situation was that he didn't know her parents. That's where finding a solution became tricky. Neither her parents nor my parents speak fluent English. Setting up a meeting between them was not a possibility. So I told him, "Trust in me." After all, he raised and instilled his values and lessons in me. I know right from wrong, because of him. Ultimately he gave in and agreed, with conditions, to let me go. Sweet victory at last! The feeling of standing up for myself and succeeding was addicting. It gave me self esteem and confidence. After a long wait, I had a voice and I wanted it to be heard.

Scholarship / Math, science - Subjects excelled. [4]

Discuss the subjects in which you excel or have excelled. To what factors do you attribute your success? Use specific examples to illustrate how you succeeded.

Success with science has lead to my success in math as well. The basic foundations and fundamentals of math and science go hand in hand. They are so closely related that to fully understand one subject, I must further my knowledge in the other as well.

Ultimately, math became my second passion. Functions, formulas, and fractions all made sense to me. In my head, I could work simple math problems and apply the concepts into reality. Math became something more than numbers and symbols to me. It is the basis that brings about economic research and gravity defying sky scrapers. In big ways and small, math has a role in everyone's life.

Everyone called me crazy to take AP Calculus, but I knew better. I had already completed all the lower math courses and my only options left were AP Statistics, AP Calculus or no math at all. The third option never existed in my mind, so I had to make a decision. Statistics was comparably less rigorous and less complex so technically it would've been an "easier way out". But I hadn't taken the easy road before, so why start now? Without a doubt, Calculus is hard. It is time consuming, one small error messes everything up, and there are a million rules to live by. Yet I love it.

Striving to push myself beyond my limits is how I've learned to excel in school. Math and science are just the top two courses in which my interest lays a foundation for my excellence. With my strong work ethic and determination, I am driven to pursue my passions through thick and thin.

****My conclusion is lacking but I'm not sure what to add. Any help (not just on the conclusion alone) is greatly appreciated!! Thank you so much!