Undergraduate / mechanical engineer + premarital relationships + business partner + ECYD - Syracuse [6]

Just some minor changes I thought might help!

So I found out a friend was studying civil engineering and he told me the engineering school was simply amazing, furthering my interest in the school.So I got even more interested.

Also change 3 to three. Usually you want to write numbers out in this kind of instance.

Undergraduate / "the vivid gardens and foliage of Ethiopia" significant experience, its impact on you [6]

You are obviously a gifted writer, however, I have heard that it's better to lean away from the typical "I visited a country with poverty and it changed my life" essay. It's touching but it's not unique and although it reveals you are clearly compassionate and wish to make a difference in the world it does not separate you from all the other college applicants who possess these same traits. If you don't have time to rewrite your essay I would try to find a way to highlight qualities that make you stand out from the rest. Good luck! Hope I could be of help!

Undergraduate / UVA Favorite word and why- labyrinth [4]

This is great! Nice choice of word. The only thing I would recommend would be to change the last phrase "to live a right life". It's a little uninspiring and disjointed from the rest of the sentence as if you tacked that on as an afterthought. All in all though I thoroughly enjoyed your essay and hope I could help out!

It would be great if you could also review my essay! Any feedback is appreciated!

Undergraduate / Work for NASA + innovative eccentric + honors science student + tech - fit for SEAP? [2]

I don't think you're horrible at writing. In fact your ideas are clear and effective. I would just try to consolidate some of you sentences as some of them are a bit too long, with too many details packed into them. This applies especially to your concluding sentences. I have difficulty with the same thing! Hope I could help.

I would also love it if you could review my essay for my application to Vassar. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated!

Undergraduate / How to Smile - Evaluate a significant experience CommonApp [4]

I really like your descriptive language. I'm not quite sure whether I would focus as much on the difficulty of your experience, it's very personal and I'm sure is challenging to write about. You might want to point out how strong you have become as a result, elaborate more on how you have learned to persevere and overcome your disorder. Hope I could help!

Undergraduate / "my low grades" - Northwestern- would you send an essay like this to a school? [11]

I would try to steer clear of focusing on aspects that schools will find negative. For instance saying you ignore other subjects will probably not encourage them to accept you. Put emphasis on the qualities that do make you a good student, like dedication to a certain area of study or your individuality (what you alone can bring to the school). Hope I could help!