Posts by katiek777

katiek777

Jan 17, 2011

Undergraduate / What group do you belong to? (multiple cultures) -- University of Michigan [6]

I belong to a very special community. It encompasses multiple cultures and millions of people across the world. It is the community of Thomas Edison, Benjamin Franklin, Albert Einstein. True to Martin Luther King's "I have a dream speech," this community does not discriminate based on a person's race, culture, or ethinicityit just sounds better in my mind, using accent made it sound kind of like your making a joke. It is more idealistici'd find a different word, like idyllic than even the most ideal governments today and only judges a person based on his or her achievement, skill, and success. It does not relegate the "poor" to the bottom most rungs or the "rich" to the top most spectrums. The community I am talking about is, of course, the ~~prominent~~unless your going to mention a specific branch, this just seems odd scientific community. We are united in this community not by a desire for monetary gain but by a common dedication to the truth.

In this community, I am merely a sapling in the edge of a huge primeval forest, the most overlooked spectacle.I understand why you said this, but unless your going to elaborate it just seems self-depreciating It is in this place that most crucial development of my life occursThis sentance feels ackward. It is here that the most integral component, the foundation, of my knowledge is solidified and my goals made lucid through the process of learning and growth ; my future is merely an addition to this continually expanding fountain of knowledge.You want to be a part of this community, then be a little forceful about it My position right now also entails choosing the most important determining factor of my future, college.Are you debating going to college in general? or just which college or which major? Be specific. With the aid of an excellant college education, I will continue moving towards my goal and emulating the great men who have come before me become a towering member of this communityThis last part is just my idea, but your final sentance needs rewriting, whether you take my idea and run with it or not.

I love the idea of identifying yourself with science instead of an absract societal idea like race or ethinicity, plus you really view yourself as a part of it which is just inspring to read. GOOD LUCK!

katiek777

Jan 17, 2011

Undergraduate / Common App - 'I lived in Shanghai; it wasn't a question of if, but when.' [3]

This is is my Common Application Transfer Essay and please forgive the commas. Of all the things i've learned, how to properly use them wasn't one of them. Please review for whatever, content may need some work...it is a first draft. Happy Reading!

I can honestly say it was never my intention to attend ____. While living in Shanghai, I had formulated a plan to attend UBC in Vancouver to study Museum management; it was a great school in a beautiful area that not only offered my major but Chinese language as well. Then I suddenly encountered the reality of my situation. I was 18 and facing starting college in a new country alone, with no family or friends for miles. I had never lived alone and was none too sure about my career choice, I couldn't even drive. While I was hesitant about abandoning my plans, when my mother suggest attending ____ for a while I found that this school offered me the opportunity to continue my education but also a more comfortable assimilation into the sudden adulthood that is college life. I have come to view Harper as a pit-stop in my life, a time for repair and readjustment, in both my life and education before continuing on to more lucrative prospects. So there was never a question of if I would leave ____, but when.

I can't imagine I could have continued my journey with quite as much confidence without the lessons I've learned at Harper. Although I am living with extended family, having to do this college thing mostly on my own has fostered an increased responsibility in areas that were hitherto handled by my parents; areas like money and health. I got a job, learned to cook and pay bills; all the skills needed to live life independently. But besides these practical skills this pit-stop has allowed for a tuning back into the American educational system, which is surprisingly different from its European counterparts, and the rigors of a normal college course load. My experiences here also led me to my chosen career path; post-secondary education specifically Asian History with a concentration on Modern China. Despite the occasionally questioning that comes along with any major life choice I feel more solidified on this path than any other.

All of this being said, my reasons for transferring are relatively simple. _____ is a two year institution, and although I have enjoyed my time here, it will never allow me to complete the Bachelors and Masters degrees I wish to and am practically required to complete. Any college level teaching position would probably require at least a Masters, if not a PhD. ____ also lacks a Mandarin department and sincerely desire to continue the language studies I began in China as it will only help in the future research I plan to conduct. It also seems silly to have spent all this time learning how to live on my own and then deciding to continue living with my grandparents; I need to put these skill to use. I am ready to move on to new challenges, in my life and education that I feel ready to face thanks to _____.