Graduate / "My career goals" - Motivation Letter for Master in Economics [4]

Probably you are right. I spent too much of this letter in showing what I am good at and not what this master will offer to me.

I changged my motivation letter a bit.
I know that it is boring but can you check it out and tell me if you find it better?
Thanks and good luck with you admission!

Motivation letter

Dear Sir or Madame,
I am currently an undergraduate student in the Department xxx, from where I am expected to graduate at August 2011, with the note "very good". I wish to continue my studies and pursue a Master's degree in Economics with a further specialisation on the field of Applied Economics.

During the semester that I studied at Freie Universität Berlin, through an Erasmus Programme scholarship and afterwards being on the Board of "Erasmus Student Network" in Athens I developed my communication skills within a multicultural environment and cooperated with other students, being also able to lead research groups. Moreover having already studied in a german university and with my excellent knowledge of the german language it will be easy for me to integrate fast in my new environment and be completely dedicated to the Master Programme's needs.

Being an intern at the Institute of International Economic Relations in Athens gave me the opportunity to research and write reports on the topic of Greek public debt. This way I improved my critical thinking and analytical skills. What is more, I got acquainted with public economics, a matter that I think is extremely important not only for the countries but also for the future of European Union as a whole. At this time it was clear to me that I wanted to specialise in applied Economics and therefor have the opportunity to understand more about the structure of the modern economies.

Another topic of Applied Microeconomics that I am really interested in is Industrial Organisation. I have followed all courses regarding this topic with one of them in Berlin (Spieltheorie, Grade 2). My goal after my graduate studies is to pursue a career within a European Union's institution, preferably at the Competition Policy department. Of course the University is ideal for this not only for it's renowned research centers (such as the Centre for Economic Studies),but also because of it's location since this ci tyis the Industrial capital of Europe.

Another important advantage, is the international environment that this Programme provides. One of the best ways for students to learn is through one another and people that come from different cultures, having also different experiences and perspectives are ideal for that. This is also a way that I will be able to contribute to this Master's Programme, exchanging knowledge and experiences with other peers. In addition; being an elected Students' representative from 2007 till 2009 helped me enhance my social skills and gave me the opportunity to mediate between students and the department faculty in order to play a small role at the improvement of the level of studies in my university.

I look forward to your favourable reply with no doubt that studying in your department will give me the opportunities and prerequisites needed to achieve my goals.

Yours faithfully.

Graduate / "to gain skills in Strategy and Finance" essay for UCLA Anderson School of Management [4]

It has a great structure!
You answer why you want this MBA, what is going to offer to you and at the end say your future career plans, so you show them where this MBA is going to get you.

You focus a bit too much on decision making but I understand that this is the most important thing that the MBA is going to teach you.. so it's ok.

Good luck with your application!

Writing Feedback / Air traffic; more secure fuel and housebuilding with sound insulating walls [5]

supporters and opponents

I liked your issue. Maybe at the advantages you could also add a way that these tax-money could be used to undo the damage that has been inflicted through air-traffic. e.g programs that will help the neighboors or maybe a research programme that will create environmental-friendlier fuels

Good job!