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Posts by Rini
Joined: Sep 5, 2011
Last Post: Jun 18, 2012
Threads: 2
Posts: 2  

From: United Kingdom (Great Britain)

Displayed posts: 4
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Rini   
Jun 18, 2012
Writing Feedback / prison is the most common solution when people commit a crime [3]

In most countries, prison is the most common solution when people commit a crime. However, if they would receive better education, it could prevent them from becoming criminals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is certainly true that imprisonment is the most popular method to punish the criminals in many countries across the globe. However, in order to prevent the criminal activities, some people think that provision of best education to the citizen could be the solution , while others argue with this statement. I am going to discuss both these views befire expressing my own opinion.

On the one hand,some of the people think that the power of education can prevent a person from being a criminal. This is because if the children are taught by their parents to differentiate about the right and wrong doing from their childhood, then it can reflects by their activities in their future. Moreover, educated people are more civilised and have more positive ideas in comparison to the illiterate people.As a matter of fact, they are not only able to get a better job by their qualification , but also become financially strong. Therefore,these people commit less criminal act in the society.

On the other hand, there are other people who think that education itself can not prevent people from being criminal. As it is seen that there are some literate people in the society who are committing violent criminal activities despite having good educational background. For instance, often we see in the newpaper that some school teachers are convicted due to abusive behaviour with students.Thus, It is suggest that education can not make a people perfect.

Analysing both views , I would like to opine that education may help to prevent the crime in the society in a certain extent. However, punishment, such as imprisonment is also necessary in order to make fear in those who commit crime as a result of their killer instinct.

(Hi all, I would really appreciate if you analysis my writing and find out as much as my mistakes so that i would able to improve myself. Thanks )
Rini   
Sep 5, 2011
Writing Feedback / Space travel in the moon is a big step for mankind, but didn't contribute to our life [3]

Whether space travel made any changes in our regular lives is a matter of debate. There are, of course, several argument for or against such a development.

It is certainly true that exploring space was a great achievement for the scientist. They have discovered existence of life there which means that it has all the criteria to support human life. And thus they are also hoping that in future people we spend there holiday in moon or will start living there in some point after destruction of the world. But the question is how this invention helping most of the citizen?

After travelled to space scientist has sent satellite to monitor weather. It saves many people lives by giving forecast about upcoming natural disaster like hurricane ,tornado or earthquake. Furthermore, satellite channel in television or radio are the main source of entertainment for most of the citizen of the world. We can not only watch the drama or movies of different countries but also be able to get instant news from any part of the world which would be impossible with out the help of satellite.

However , it is also true that travelling to space is highly expensive. only few development countries of the world can afford this because of its high maintenance.it is also not unknown to us that a spaceship emerge enormous gases to the air which leads to environmental pollution .While our half of the nation are in hunger ,illiterate or in unsettled condition due to financial crisis, I , therefore believe that this space travel cost us more than its merits.

To conclude, I think although space travel has bought some changes in our life but it has very less contribution in our daily life.

(Hi, Could you please evaluate my writing as I am really strugling to achieve 7score in my IELTS. Your openion will be so much valuable for me to improve my writing.Thanks)
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