Unanswered [8] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by 754changsteph
Joined: Oct 26, 2011
Last Post: Oct 28, 2011
Threads: 1
Posts: 3  

From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 4
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754changsteph   
Oct 28, 2011
Undergraduate / 'After I got the rejection letter' - Stanford re-applicants Essay [2]

I think that maybe you should shorten the beginning a bit...talk about your devastation, but maybe don't dwell so much on the past; transition more into the future and explain what and how your experiences have changed you. Great writing, though!
754changsteph   
Oct 28, 2011
Writing Feedback / TOEFL:The expression "Never, never give up" [4]

"Last but not least, keep trying renders positive energy."

That sentence is confusing. You should edit it to be more like "Perseverance renders positive energy."
Great writing, though!
754changsteph   
Oct 28, 2011
Undergraduate / 'In failure, I find success' - Introduce yourself to Penn [2]

Optional short essay (approximately 150 words): introduce yourself to Penn. Our aim is to better understand how your identity, talents, and background guide your day-to-day experiences.

I've never made the soccer team. Calculus is as mysterious to me as the meaning of life. I will perhaps never be able to play guitar while singing. I have failed more than I have succeeded. I have cried, stomped my feet, complained. It doesn't help. I wipe the dirt off my face. Grab a blank sheet of paper. Find a G chord. I try again. Perhaps my only success is my ability to persevere; I am not afraid to fail again. As long as I have a passion, an interest, a reason, I continue. I refuse to let myself be defined by my failures. Rather, I define myself by my success-my success in persevering, that is. My mother always reminds me, "Successful people are not those who've never fallen. They are those who have the courage to get back up each time they fall." In failure, I find success.
754changsteph   
Oct 28, 2011
Undergraduate / Engineering: MIT - Which department or program at MIT appeals to you and why? [4]

I think you should show some specifics as to why you like engineering...really think about it. What about engineering is so fascinating? I think since you don't already have a set type of engineering you want to go into in mind, the details would really help.
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