Undergraduate / 'heart surgery' + 'Engineering leaders' + 'A geek' - USC for engineering department [3]

This is my first draft for USC's short essays. Please feel free to criticize and pour out anything you feel about my essay. Looking forward for feedbacks and suggestions. Thankyou :)

1. Describe your academic interests and how you plan to pursue them at USC. Please feel free to address your first- and second-choice major selections. (3500 characters)

I was 10 years old when my grandfather had a heart surgery. There was a coronary artery blockage that had caused blood to clump in his aortic arch. The arch was bloated and ready to burst any second as his heart continue pumping blood out. It was within the matter of split of seconds, had we been late to discover what was going on with grandfather, we would have to bare the sight of one empty seat in the dining table. It was the in-plant of a valve ring that saved him. The valve ring was inserted into his aortic arch to expand the cloaked size and allow blood to flow through the blockage. Since then, I felt in debt to the discovery of the valve ring. As years go by, I was keen into biological engineering studies, the technological development to aid the human health. The valve ring was a discovery from the biological engineering research department, so were the research on artificial organs like the limbs, heart, kidney, etc. It amazes me, the idea to create the human anatomy, to be able to be in control of the human body. Over the years, USC had been known for the intense research that had been undergone in the engineering department. It would be an honor to have an insight into their projects.

2. Engineering leaders do more than just solve technical problems. What kinds of experiences, inside and outside of the classroom, would you want to explore to enhance your studies?

You are reading this right now, has it ever occurred to you how is it that your eyeballs are able to deliberately move accordingly to the passage? The sky color is light blue to me, is that very same sky blue that I perceive reflected in your eyes too? The human mind is a vast entity, unpredictable and endless. I realized this as I attend 'Theory of Knowledge' classes along the IB Diploma program. I was taught to question everything, because there is no such thing as a solid answer. There are always different approaches to a solution, and there is no only one true solution, just like how the Gödel's theorem proved that even math is not free from contradiction. I am a curious person, and I do not like not knowing. What is it is in your mind? How did you even trigger that thought? How did you brain send signals to the muscles in your fingers to be typing into the computer? If I were being able to create artificial systems, maybe I could finally understand the beautiful mechanisms of the human system.

3. Engineers have sometimes been stereotyped as "nerds" or "geeks." Do you embrace or reject that stereotype? Why?

Who exactly do you call a geek? A smart, glasses, antisocial person? I see my brother hang out with his friends every weekend, with perfect eyesight and do not live in the library. Yet he is pursuing industrial engineering in USC. Thomas Alfa Edison spent his life experimenting on a light bulb and he succeeded after failing 1000 attempts. Did he spend all those years being a geek? If you call a man pursuing his passion a geek, then yes Edison was a geek. He was a passionate geek reaching out for his dreams, who finally succeeded and if it weren't for him, we would be living in darkness. That is what I picture engineers to be, individuals who have a burning passion to create and contribute to the world. In my eyes, engineers are not obsessive self-centered geeks who live with the books, but they utilized those thick heavy books for a purpose, to discover a phenomenon that will make the world a better place to live in.

Undergraduate / 'I wasn't ready for college' + 'No talk about me' -Intellectual Vitality and roommate [3]

I am new to the essay forum and don't quite understand how this works. But I am willingly open to suggestions and feedbacks on my short essays for Stanford's supplement. You are welcome to critique as you please on my essay.

1. Stanford students possess an intellectual vitality; reflect on an idea or experience that has been important to your intellectual development.

I was technically a graduate high school student by 2010 (I took the GCE O levels examination on my secondary 4 and the certificate was sufficient to enter college) and I was prepared to enter the next stage of my life - college. I had been bragging to my friends and relatives, hoping they would pass the rumor of the youngest freshman at the age of 15 that they ever knew - freshmen we knew were at least 16 years old. I have always been the star in my junior high school, the prodigy girl who got promoted to Year 9 directly after her 7th Year, and yet managed to top her class. Everyone's favorite girl who always participated as a major role in every event, whose pictures were always up on the school's flyers and newsletters. I felt as if I owned my junior high school, it literally felt like my second home. It was a week after my examination, that my parents decided for me to continue senior years, in a new high school. I felt humiliated, what am I supposed to say to my friends when they expect me to be telling them stories as a first-year? Besides, they're moving me away from my 'home', I felt betrayed. Now that I look back, I couldn't help thinking of what a hyperbole reaction I had. If it weren't for my parents to move me into a new school, I wouldn't ever be able to open my eyes. I had been cocky - a cocky little toad enclosed in the deep well - as my father liked to say it. I was so content on my abilities in the well that I was limited and blinded of the outside world. When they removed the lid, I realized how far behind I was compared to the wild toads outside. They could jump higher when I thought I had the highest jump. I could understand my parent's choice now - that I wasn't ready for college life until I understood that there is always room for improvement. The past 2 years had been an intense self-reflection. I learnt not only in academics but to be a thorough, considerable person. It was a worthy stage in my life to prepare me for college life.

2. Virtually all of Stanford's undergraduates live on campus. Write a note to your future roommate that reveals something about you or that will help your roommate - and us - know you better.

Hi future roommate,
I'm not quite a person who likes to talk about herself, let alone brag. I do not self-judge, but instead am open to opinions. So instead of giving you a description of myself, why don't I take you to an insight of the room I grew up in.

Don't be shy, you're always welcomed into my suite, as I like to address my room. Notice how different the theme of my room is right as you stepped in? I designed the layout and colors myself. It was on purpose, I like being different. I do not try to fit into the society, but instead project my uniqueness. I hope you will accept me as I am. I'm not going to frighten you, trust me its lovely inside.

My furniture is flushed in white and my walls are covered in sky blue wallpaper. It reminds me of the infinite sky, the infinite hopes and dreams we are born with it. I believe in dreaming big, that there is no limit for one to dream as high as possible, the driving force to success.

My study desk is neatly tidied up, so are my bookshelves. I read a lot, science fiction romantic action novels. You may find me sitting by the windowpane reading, come join me, that is if you aren't acrophobic, cause I'm not, I love being on high places. It makes me feel somewhat Godly, to have a view of the neighborhood. It isn't so scary up here; it actually is a pretty view.

I think that's enough of mesmerizing the scenic view, come inside and I'll show you the way out, I hope you liked the environment in here. Yes you've spotted my collections at the corner. They are mini figure crafts I made. There's one of a café's entrance, bakery's kitchen, beach, and you can admire the rest. And on the second shelf are souvenirs my friends have been getting me. I value souvenirs a lot, they are symbols of friendship and I never want to lose them. I am looking forward to display one from you.

Thankyou for spending time reading this, looking forward for comments :)