Undergraduate / "my intended major is history" - UC personal statement. Prompt 2 [2]

What is your intended major? Discuss how your interest in the subject developed and describe any experience you have had in the field-such as volunteer work, internships and employment, participation in student organizations and activities-and what you have gained from your involvement.

In high school, I always told people that I would become an English major because it was my strongest subject. When I got to college though, I realized that just because I was good at something did not mean it was my passion. So, I decided to be undecided and left it at that. It was not until my second semester at Pasadena City College that I knew what my major would be. There I was, sitting at my desk waiting for the professor to walk through the door on the first day of class. History 1A, or "The History of European Civilization" was the subject of the course and I assumed that we would be bombarded with the biographies of typical historical figures and plenty of useless dates. Boy was I wrong.

Dr. Schwyzer finally arrived and without hesitation scribbled the word "history" on the board and stared at us with questionable eyes. At this point, I had no idea what was going on and neither did anybody else. Then he asked, "What does this word mean to you?" and as the room remained silent, he proceeded to give us a definition that I had never heard before. "It is the study of writing" he said, "and it is the most interesting subject of them all". This caught me off guard immediately. I had never met anyone so passionate about history, and at that very moment I became extremely curious as to why he felt that way.

Throughout the semester I took hundreds of pages of notes and listened to countless stories about great leaders and powerful empires. I absorbed every bit of information with an intensity that I had never felt before. At last, I had found my niche! Since then, I have taken as many history classes as I could. The subject has captivated me and the knowledge I have gained has proven to be more useful than I ever imagined.

Needless to say, my intended major is history and I intend to use it as a stepping stone towards a career in law.

** this one cannot be any longer than it already is...the other statement I wrote was 697 words, so I meant for this one to be short and to the point. Any input would be greatly appreciated :)

Undergraduate / to make school my priority - UC personal statement [5]

Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution, or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it reflect who you are?

Ever since I can remember, my mother and father have been telling me to make school my priority. In fact, not a day goes by where they do not remind me of my potential and inspire me to take advantage of the opportunities that I do have, in order to become someone great. So, when I think about my accomplishments, and try to single one out, there is only one that I am extremely proud of. That one thing is my educational success, and the reason why it stands out is because I was able to achieve it all independently.

As a first generation American, I have had no choice but to learn a lot of things on my own. My parents never attended college, so they have never been able to answer any of my questions, or give me any advice. Instead of feeling helpless, I have turned this disadvantage into something positive. I have made it my most important goal, the one that I have been striving to realize ever since my freshman year of high school. I would become the first person in my family to pursue a higher education, and I would do it in spite of any obstacles in my path.

As a result, I have always held high standards for myself. I love overcoming challenges because they make you feel like anything is possible. That is why I took Honors and Advanced Placement classes at Glendora High School, and that is also why I am currently participating in the Scholars Program at Pasadena City College. To me, the extra work is all worth it. I take leadership positions at school and at home because it comes easy to me and it feels the most natural. For example, I am currently the president of the Students for Women's Equal Rights club and I would not have it any other way. I enjoy taking charge, and the club's purpose, which is to educate others on current issues that revolve around gender equality, is more than enough motivation for me to become deeply involved. Not everyone is cut out to be a leader, but I know that it is a quality that I possess. Thus, I am thankful for being put in a situation where I am forced to depend solely on myself and not others for help.

So what is my most important personal quality? Taking initiative. Taking complete advantage of my inner-strength and desire to succeed. I know that there are plenty of applicants just like me, who have worked very hard in school in order to be accepted someplace prestigious like the University of California, but there are not very many who truly understand the underlying meaning of such an opportunity. I have chosen education as a way to reach my idea of the American dream, and I plan to do that by taking my accomplishments and putting them to good use.

** Is this even good? and how do i fix the conclusion...its not done but I do not know what else to say, or how to tie it all together