Undergraduate / "I am not a "nobody" - UC Prompt 2 [3]

Your essay is well written and despite a few problems with tenses, I think overall, that it's a good piece.

A lack of confidence was one of my most alarming weaknesses. Perhaps humility was another. Whenever I came close to being offered a leadership position previously, I used to think of and justify how someone else was more deserving of it than me. Hence, true enough, I was never given a position.

I eventually realized that there was merely a fine line distinguishing humbleness and apprehension about a person's abilities and that I was trapped in the latter. There will always be people who are better than I am, but it is the attitude that I possess with regard to this fact that matters most. If I did not even believe in myself, how was I to convince my peers that they can believe in me?

I am less of a "nobody" now and I will still continue working on it. My next step would be to convince others that they can be like me too. I may have been a late bloomer, but that would not deter me from believing that I can unleash my true potential as a leader.

Undergraduate / "a freshman who hated Chinese"; "chicken on fire" - UC PROMPT 1 & 2 [8]

I really enjoyed reading your second essay. Very humorous and touching.
I only changed a few things: (in bold)

"THE CHICKEN IS ON FIRE! THE CHICKEN IS ON FIRE", I screamed. My parents rushed into the smoky kitchen, only to catch me burning tonight's dinner. Tears rolled down my eyes, as I awaited for the inevitable punishment. But then I opened my eyes and saw not the furious eyes of my parents, but instead, the image of my father on the floor laughing. For years after, I have asked myself this trivial question: Why were my parents laughing when I could have burned the apartment down?

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