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Posts by theboss639
Joined: Dec 29, 2011
Last Post: Dec 29, 2011
Threads: 3
Posts: 4  

From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 7
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theboss639   
Dec 29, 2011
Undergraduate / 'Humans made of' / 'Alarm clocks' - Tufts Personal/World Outlook Essays [2]

Hi everyone! Could you please read these essays? Thanks in advance.

1. Use the richness of your identity to frame your personal outlook.

They say humans are 65% Oxygen, 18% Carbon, 10% Hydrogen and 3% Nitrogen. My life is composed like a human. 65% of it is school and homework, 18% is extracurricular activities, 10% is family time, 3% is eating, and the other 4% is everything else. Of my day, my favorite portion is eating. I have been a pure vegetarian since I was born. I tried meat, but it was disgusting! My favorite dinner any night is kidney beans and rice, which we call "Rajma Chawal." Just thinking about it makes my mouth water. Made with the perfect spiciness, the softest kidney beans and awonderful sauce, it is a delicacy. Most people assume this to be curry! Indian curry is made from curry powder, water and eggs. That is the one food I really dislike!

Sometimes I am bothered by my vegetarianism. It would be really hard to travel to eastern countries and find a restaurant with vegetarian entrïes. Those countries have fish as their primary food source, but little vegetarian options. When I go to a restaurant, I have to order from two to three options where as everyone else can order from the whole menu. But there are benefits to my vegetarianism. Most herbivores have a longer life expectancy than carnivores. That means, I can continue eating Rajma Chawal for years to come!

I never limit myself, even though I am a vegetarian. I try new things, especially food. That is how I expand my horizons, especially food.

2. Describe the environment in which you were raised--your family, home, neighborhood, or community--and how it influenced the person you are today. (200-250 words)

Most people wake up to alarm clocks in the morning; as a child, I woke up to my neighbors hitting a gong. I woke up to that noise every morning for the five years I lived on my farm in India. It was not the typical farm most people would think of. The only livestock we had was cows. A nearby village supplied labor for the plant that my grandfather founded: Bhatia Quality Seeds. I walked to his office everyday to see him, and usually went off on a tangent along the way. The snake infested mango orchard was my favorite digression. Though most of the time, I would go half way in, and then run out, if fear of snakes. It had the most delicious mangoes anyone could find. That fact that they grew on our farm made it more special. My favorite memories of my childhood are of the digressions I took to go to the plant.

This adventurous past shaped my present and will shape my future. Growing up I was more adventurous than most of my friends. I explored forests, while there would be in the park playing. Living on a farm, I received the perspective of a small town boy. Even though I live in a large city, I still hold the values of exploration of that little child in the orchard. I now aspire to explore engineering at Tufts University.

THANK YOU FOR READING. :) It means a lot.
theboss639   
Dec 29, 2011
Undergraduate / 'Vibrant layers and black canvas' - Common App Short Answer: Art [5]

In the beginning the subject changes from "one" to "I." Either you need to have a better transition or you need to refer to "one" as I. I recommend saying:

Like Other artists, I must have a grasp on the potential of the surface, the medium, and the endless possibilities of my imagination before the creative process can begin.
theboss639   
Dec 29, 2011
Undergraduate / Why Northwestern? My first impression [6]

I like how you were personally acquitted with the university. That adds a lot to your essay. I would recommend rereading it for coherence because I got lost in the third paragraph. Best of luck. :)
theboss639   
Dec 29, 2011
Undergraduate / My parents got divorced; Significant Challenge I've faced: MIT [4]

The prompt is: Tell us about the most significant challenge you've faced or something important that didn't go according to plan. How did you manage the situation? (200-250 words)

I am at 249 words.
Please look it over. :)

The door slammed shut, and I knew it was over. All I could do was stand there foolishly as he left without even saying goodbye. During middle school, my parents got divorced. I never dreamt that my parents would get divorced, as it has never happened in our family. I decided to stay with my mom because she was the best mom in the world.

That year, an array of emotions filled my heart. He did not ask me to come with him. On my birthday, I waited for his call in vain. Since then, he has broken all contacts with us. As a result, we were trapped in a financially difficult situation. I was angry for not having a "perfect" family. I felt very sad, but refused to display my emotions around my family and friends. When my friends would invite me to play with them, I ignored them and pretended to do homework.

I consider the divorce of my parents as an unfortunate event in my life, but I have decided to not let it or anything else restrict me from succeeding. Once in a while I do think of him; nevertheless, I prevent the thoughts from having a negative impact on me. Through this hardship, I have emerged stronger, compassionate and further motivated to succeed. As Kenji Miyazawa said, "We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey." Through the divorce, I have realized that my mom and I are the perfect family.

Thank you for your input. :)
theboss639   
Dec 29, 2011
Undergraduate / My Y BU essay (Economics department) [9]

I feel like I truly belong to vibrant and dynamic campus life in BU.

The essay is a bit all over the place. Maybe focusing on one or two aspects of BU would be better. It would be more coherent and easier to understand.
theboss639   
Dec 29, 2011
Undergraduate / "Failure is not an option"; Stanford Intellectual Vitality [4]

The question is: Stanford students possess an intellectual vitality. Reflect on an idea or experience that has been important to your intellectual development.

Here is the essay.

Growing up, I heard the phrase "Failure is not an option" and consistently tried to stay away from it. Now that I have matured, I understand that this quote is fallacious. Ambition is the result of failure. Two years ago, my science teacher ordered me to create a mousetrap vehicle for the annual statewide science contest. Fifteen painful snaps and a hundred splinters later, I created a so called masterpiece. Having immersed myself in the First Deadly Sin, Pride, I chose to take the car straight to the tournament without performing any essential tests. My foolishness led my creation to unfortunately become a piece of wood flying at close competitors. At that moment, all I felt was utter shame for my lack of success in my first attempt. In spite of the failure, this experience had a positive impact on my life. I realized that making mistakes is the first step to truly learning. Since then, I have made many mousetrap vehicles in order to succeed in the contest. My failure resulted in a magnificent vehicle that brought the contest trophy to our school.

This seemingly catastrophic experience will further help me by encouraging me to not ignore the mistakes I will likely make in rigorous college programs, but rather encouraging me to constructively learn from those mistakes. Without failing in some aspects, I would have never understood my weaknesses that I could improve. As Henry Ford, "Failure is the opportunity to begin again more intelligently." I am bound to have difficulty with college, but I know that I will emerge smarter and successful. To make errors is human nature, but to learn from mistakes is essential.

Thank you for reading my essay. It is much appreciated. :)
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