Unanswered [5] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by jadore_lamode68 [Suspended]
Joined: Dec 31, 2011
Last Post: Jan 10, 2012
Threads: 6
Posts: 37  

From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 43 / page 2 of 2
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jadore_lamode68   
Jan 5, 2012
Undergraduate / 'I indulge in silence' - my commapp [10]

Thanks for your feedback! (and everyone elses) I think that would work really well, but I'm not sure how I should go about doing that.

Any ideas? Thankssss!!!!
jadore_lamode68   
Jan 10, 2012
Writing Feedback / Facebook: A double-edged sword - a current scientific or social controversy [3]

Well written essay! I liked how you didn't say what everyone excepts about facebook- that it wastes time and ect. Your essay was very eye opening- espeially the bit anout Ghandi. Great job! The only think I can think to change is the intro. I think its a tad weak compared to the rest of the essay. You could play off of your sister in the beginning.

Overall great essay!

Hope this helps,
All the best Luck
jadore_lamode68   
Jan 10, 2012
Undergraduate / 'a typical engineering family' - Purdue University [4]

1. Yes, however adding experience is only good if you say what you've learned from it about yourself, or how much you love engineering.
2. Mmm the last paragraph take some risk which I don't think really work. I think you need to go deeper into the programs you like about Purdue and add the specific names of the alumni and what they've done. Also when you talk about making the likes of others better it sounds a tinge like your looking down on people, perhaps think of a way to say that being in Perdue's engineering program not only condition you to be a greeeaaat engineer but a leader on all fronts of human enterprise... idk just my opinion.

Otherwise great essay!
All the best luck,
I hope this helps

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