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Posts by mpatel246
Joined: Dec 29, 2008
Last Post: Dec 31, 2008
Threads: 3
Posts: 5  


Displayed posts: 8
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mpatel246   
Dec 30, 2008
Undergraduate / Cornell Supplement, School of Hotel Management [5]

You essay is very good it flows nicely. It needs to be more alluring in the intro.
I really like how you end the essay ties it up reall nicely.
mpatel246   
Dec 30, 2008
Undergraduate / 'I love Rochester, but I need a change' - Boston University Supplement [6]

Students consider many different factors when applying to college. Briefly discuss who or what influenced your decision to apply to Boston University - 2000 characters

During my search for colleges, I've tried to stay focus on schools that could further my goal of some day becoming a successful hotel administrator. Of the things that worried me about college, the quality of education I will receive for business management was a major issue. As a result I have taken a particular interest in an honors program. The School of Management Honors Program provided by Boston University is one of my main reasons for applying. To some, a program of this sort might appear to be restrictive, preventing a prospective student from trying out various courses and trying to find their place. I feel though that I know where I want to be and that a program like this shows me how to get there.

Rochester, the only home I've ever known, is about a six-hour drive from Boston. I love this city with all my heart, but after so many years, I feel like I need some change. The hustle and bustle of Rochester is too much for me to handle and can be overwhelming at times. The people here are always busy and exhausted, and this combination makes many of them inclined to be irritable, and at times unpleasant. From what I researched about Boston, it is also a large city when compared with Rochester. However, unlike Rochester, it does not have the same hustle and bustle which perhaps could give me the chance to look around and even interact with those around me. Along the same vein, I feel there is no better place for a college student, new to the world, than Boston. Growing up in one of the most diverse suburbs in Rochester, Brighton, I would not feel comfortable leaving my home if I was going to live somewhere lacking diversity. This is not true for Boston University, which practically embodies diversity. With so many universities in the area people come in all over the country. It's for this reason that I feel that the environment around Boston University is one in which I can grow, learn, and mature, all away from home.

Can anyone give me input on my essay. Be truthfull and honest. Also can anyone check for constitancy, grammer, and if it answers the question.

Thank you very much.
mpatel246   
Dec 29, 2008
Undergraduate / University of Rochester Supplement 2 (many different points of view) [3]

Rochester students represent many different points of view. Each student constructs an independent study and research plan. Describe what you will contribute to Rochester's diversity of ideas, experiences, and identities. If you can, incorporate a positive past experience where you chose your own learning path, or a negative experience where you wanted to exercise more independence

Coming from an ethnic background, I was usually secluded from society by others. However instead of letting this obstacle weigh me down, it become a motivation to learn about the world around me. Now as a young man I am prepared to thrive as I make meaningful contributions at one of the best learning institutions, University of Rochester. Bringing the Indian culture to the university campus, the experience from working in business management, dedication and devotion for my love of education, the list is of contribution is endless. My professors will be flabbergasted towards my commitment towards my work. My classmates will wait in anticipation as I will lead them to a bright future.

there is 125 word, 1000 character limit

Can anyone check for consistancy, Spelling or grammer error, and if it answers the U of R questions. Thank You.
mpatel246   
Dec 29, 2008
Undergraduate / Rochester Supplement -What makes it good for me? [5]

1. What makes the University of Rochester a good fit for you? In answering, identify your sources of information, including any conversations you've had with Rochester faculty, staff, students, or alumni.

What makes a university good? A good university feeds the curiosity of others, has excellent educational facilities, and a diverse environment. These factors shape my rationale for choosing the University of Rochester. Through my conversation with student Ravi Patel, I learned that every student, despite their chosen major, is encouraged to indulge in the University's research opportunities. Independent research will not only allow me to broaden my thought process in business decision making, but also prepare me for a career in business management. Through another conversation with former graduate Shailesh Patel, I have come to appreciate the University's open curriculum. The open curriculum permits me to explore my curiosities and enables me to learn efficiently. Lastly, Rochester's diverse campus will help enrich my college experience.

Word limit is 125, 1000 characters

Can anyone check if it is consistant, any grammitical errors, and if it answers the question. Thank you.
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