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Posts by AshieeNicole
Joined: Aug 14, 2012
Last Post: Aug 14, 2012
Threads: 1
Posts: 1  

From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 2
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AshieeNicole   
Aug 14, 2012
Writing Feedback / TOEFL essay : The subject that you want to learn more about (economics) [7]

I feel like the others have helped you tremendously. In addition to what they have, ever- changing should be hyphenated.
I think you will have very clear writing when you make the changes that have been suggested to you. It could stand to be a little bit longer, but I think your explanations are significant enough to get your point across.
AshieeNicole   
Aug 14, 2012
Undergraduate / 'Playing softball' - CommonApp - Short Answer Essay on Extracurricular [3]

Please briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences in the space below (1000 character maximum).

When I grow older and recall fond memories of growing up, I'll always remember the days I spent covered head to toe in dirt and sweat doing what I love the most: playing softball. What started as a just-for-fun activity in my childhood turned into a passion that landed me in tournaments and national championships alike. Playing softball essentially became my life. What is most outstanding is not the cost of the expenses, the travel, or the equipment; neither the number of hours spent training nor the number of trophies I've won, and not any given year's statistics of my team or personal performance. What's most exceptional are the situations I've encountered that helped me become who I am. Hours of practice and countless games have introduced me to dedication, enthusiasm, and hard work - all now values instilled deep within the core of my existence. With those principles, I do everything. Softball has shaped me on and off the field and it will always be a substantial part of my life.

Thanks in advance for your help!
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