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Posts by jucks0r
Joined: Jan 10, 2009
Last Post: Feb 1, 2009
Threads: 3
Posts: 6  


Displayed posts: 9
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jucks0r   
Feb 1, 2009
Undergraduate / U of Michigan Short Answer - Diversity, engineering [5]

first of all, thanks for the help :D

so you're saying I should put the quote in the beginning, but that makes it even longer?
Should I get rid of the parts you stroke out?

and are they really THAT strict about word count?
jucks0r   
Feb 1, 2009
Undergraduate / Penn State - career goals and personal statement - (aspiring engineer) [3]

Include a brief statement of your plans for the field of study you wish to pursue. This should include your reasons for studying your chosen field, your intended area of specialization within this field, and a brief description of the career you plan to follow after completion of this course of study at Penn State.

I have always been fascinated with math and science, and I excelled in both, which boosted my confidence, hence my interest for engineering sciences. I for one really admired the capability of rational thinking every single engineer had. It was pretty impressive to discover how engineers can consider problems differently and look at things from different angles when nobody else can. Problem solving skills and finding another way when everybody else gets stuck in one are some of my traits that I take pride in, and one way to improve these skills, is through engineering study. Thinking outside the box has always been very amusing and challenging to me, further strengthening my drive towards being an engineer. Being a do-a-bit-of-everything individual as I grew up, industrial engineering caught my attention as I found out in my research that it was like several engineering majors combined. I talked to several counselors, experts and even attended some "career panel meetings" about Industrial Engineering. It seems you need engineers to run factories, but you need an industrial engineer to lead and keep everything in place. Industrial engineers are systems engineers, more on the logistic and management side of the operation. They are indeed supposed to know the core fundamentals of main engineering studies, so this makes them the go-to guy in leading a team of engineers. Knowing all this, I wanted to become an industrial engineer of some sort. I'm confident that my studies in the first few years of college will give me enough knowledge to further solidify my career decision, but for now, I am merely a student who wants to make a difference. As I grew up, I never knew what I really wanted to become. The only thing I always knew was that I wanted to make a difference, be useful to humanity; I want to leave something behind and let the world feel my absence when I'm gone, instead of being another speck of dust in the wind.

Please use the space below to tell us about your preparations for college. Explain any interruptions in your schooling, e.g., military service or employment. Please tell us about your important time commitments other than academic work (for example, school organizations, jobs, the arts, services, and athletics).

My most important non-academic time consumers in high school would be my band, the handball team and the golf team. For five years, including this one, I played the drums for our current band. It was one of the major activities I did both in and out of school. Personally, I think the band allowed us to get our minds off of school and cool off from time to time, giving us another alternative to focus on. Then again, our band also allowed us to perform in several school shows and concerts, and even represent our school in some. I think us, as a band, contributed deeply to the social scene in school and had a kick about it. We hope to continue our work but who knows what the future will bring.

Another thing worth mention would be the handball team. I played as the pivot of the handball team for two years, until I was too old to qualify for the championship. Participating in a team sport was important for me in many ways but the team work aspect would come first. For two years, we had great fun, and for two years, we had two days of practice every week. That much time spent together creates a lot of good memories, and even better friendships. I also experienced a long lasting bond with the golf team, which I was a member for four years. Due to my father, I already played golf outside of school and was very excited when the school decided to assemble a club, which eventually turned into a team. We were very lucky and grateful to have the national team's coach as our school team's trainer, and he turned each one of us into real golfers in no time.

My most important activity and the one I take the most pride in, would be my time spent in outdoor sports and adventure camp called Camp Wolftrack. For 8 years now, I have been going to this magnificent camp where I owe most of the development of my character. I started out as a little camper myself, but then I became a counselor just like the ones who thought me how to light a fire or build a shelter. Now I share my prized knowledge with the young eager campers that come to Camp Wolftrack every year, just like I used to do. All in all, Camp Wolftrack has a great role in who I am today. It was an experience that shaped and established my character in the spring of its development, and I'm grateful.

Then of course, there is my academic career. I considered school like a fun place to spend time, with a side order of learning things, just to realize that my scores and GPA was vital for my college education too late into my high school career, and I still regret that. After 10th grade, I finally opened my eyes and realized I had to keep things tight from then on. I pulled up my GPA and paid more of the much deserved attention to my classes and grades. At the end of 11th grade, I started to take interest in SATs and I finished taking all my required exams by the end of 2008. My new priority and major time commitment in life then became my academic interests.

Anything useless? dull ? boring? anything I should replace or omit?
Any suggestions would be highly appreciated !!
jucks0r   
Feb 1, 2009
Undergraduate / About My thesis statement!(USC TRANSFER) [4]

"Amongst my many passions, the one that stands out the most is my passion for success."

or

"My passion for success is the one that stands out the most among my many other passions."

good luck :)
jucks0r   
Feb 1, 2009
Undergraduate / "conflicting cultures" - COLUMBIA ADMISSION ESSAY [9]

I am one of a million shards of glass situated neither here nor there.

Did you want to either here or there in this first sentence? or is it a really strong imagery that I'm not getting yet :D

anyway the rest of the essay looks really solid and strong, very well written I think.
good job
good luck :D
jucks0r   
Jan 31, 2009
Undergraduate / U of Michigan Short Answer - Diversity, engineering [5]

[A] "We know that diversity makes us a better university - better for learning, for teaching, and for conducting research." (U-M President Mary Sue Coleman)

Share an experience through which you have gained respect for intellectual, social, or cultural differences. Comment on how your personal experiences and achievements would contribute to the diversity of the University of Michigan.


Diversity provides the opportunity of blending all the different culture in the world into one ultimate "aroma", an intellectual mix, which is vital to any successful learning environment. The accumulated diverse opinions and thoughts constitute a better university or even a better country and a better world. The word "respect" is the most essential part in dealing with multicultural environments, respect to others thoughts, culture, opinions and beliefs. As I grew up in Turkey, I became accustomed to many different cultures and beliefs and eventually learned to respect and appreciate each and everyone. Somehow in Turkey, you can find every kind of people and that's a fact. Both of my schools were English education schools which allowed me to further expand my knowledge on English and American culture, along with my own and other Middle East cultures. Through my journey in life, I have experienced that no matter what the situation, different opinions is the aide. On a larger scale, this could easily transfer to diversity. My most recent experience was last summer, when I went to Summer Discovery in Northeastern University. Coming from Turkey, I already anticipated the high level of diverse students I would be meeting, yet I was still surprised when I got to meet the whole lot; from Puerto Ricans to Mexicans and from Irish to Spanish to Korean, everyone was there. During my one month stay there, I found out a lot about all the culture I've been missing out on and saw that diversity really works well in a college environment. There was literally no problem of getting along with each other; everyone was like they knew each other forever. This gave me more hope and confidence about acclimatizing to college life, as I saw I had absolutely no problem blending in with people from other cultures and contributing to the diverse educational mix. I think my Turkish background combined with all my personal experience should enable me to contribute a lot to the learning environment in the University of Michigan.

did I answer the prompt? And I need to omit some of the useless sentences to meet the length criteria and I don't really know if my answer is solid or well organized?

any help would be much appreciated THANKS !!!

I also found this quote that I liked
"If we are to achieve a richer culture, rich in contrasting values, we must recognize the whole gamut of human potentialities, and so weave a less arbitrary social fabric, one in which each diverse human gift will find a fitting place."

should I squeeze this in somewhere or just leave it out?...

[B]
Please describe your interests and aspirations in engineering. What experiences have influenced you?(approximately 250 words)


I was always fascinated with math and science, since I excelled in both which boosted my confidence, hence my interest for engineering sciences. Being a do-a-bit-of-everything individual as I grew up, industrial engineering caught my attention as I found out in my researches that it was like several engineering majors combined. I talked to several counselors, experts and even attended some "career panel meetings" about Industrial Engineering. It seems you need engineers to run factories or corporations, but you need an Industrial Engineer to lead and keep everything in place. See, industrial engineers are supposed to know the fundamentals of electrical, chemical and mechanical engineering, so this makes them to go-to guy in leading a team of engineers: they are the guys that speak everybody's language. Then again, I still like to keep an open mind about other engineering careers since I don't think I am knowledgeable enough in certain fields to make a choice, but still, I think industrial engineering would have a special "priority" place in my heart. As to further elaborate on why I would like to be an engineer, my childhood memories would serve to be helpful. Although I haven't had a certain solid experience that influenced me to be an engineer right away, I have always loved to create and fiddle with things, even as a little boy. I had countless toy "work bench" kits and I looked up to my dad as a role model, for he had this hobby of assembling and playing with remote control cars; the whole mechanical system and the engine and everything. It wouldn't be wrong to think that the household items from my childhood had an influence in my career choice. Then again there were my own childish thoughts which seem so far away to accomplish, but still pretty amazing even at this age. My ultimate dream has always been about making a difference, being useful to humanity; I want to leave something behind and let the world feel my absence when I'm gone, instead of being another speck of dust in the wind.

I think I got a little overboard and WAAAAY LOST in this one so please help again :D
any useless sentences or comments I should avoid or omit?
I would really appreciate any contribution

thanks a lot in advance
jucks0r   
Jan 31, 2009
Undergraduate / U Michigan Setback essay ("departed from high school since graduation") [8]

I was about to start memorizing the next two hundred words on my vocabulary list.Suddenly, the lamp went off, the noise of the refrigerator was dead, and even the feeble stream of streetlights stopped piercing through my window. A blackout fell upon the house (or seized the house). I spoke a word out loud, but no one in my family answered me---they weren't back from work yet. I was home alone, always, from day to night, from summer to winter. I hated darkness, and I hated this darkness for awakening the loneliness in the depths of my mind.

There is a start for you :D sorry I couldn't read further for I am working on the same essays too and the deadline is tomorrow !! good luck :)

I think its a nice start that interests the reader, but is the rest actually related with you being alone at home ? consider that
hope this helps
jucks0r   
Jan 10, 2009
Undergraduate / USC SHORT ANSWER RESPONSE - "to study abroad" [7]

# Describe your academic interests and how you plan to pursue them at USC.

Does my response answer the prompt ? this was the best I could come up with at 1AM please comment and help...
thanks

After finally deciding that I was to study abroad, I had to choose a career or at least a major at some point. My inclinations were towards engineering sciences, since I wasn't any good with literature or social studies. Being a do-a-bit-of-everything individual as I grew up, Industrial Engineering caught my attention as people pointed out to me that it was like several engineering majors combined together. I was mostly impressed by the rational way of thinking and looking at everything all the engineers seemed to have, and I for one was eager to have that rational view as a positive trait. USC has one of the nations best engineering programs and I certainly would like to be a part of it. In my first years, I plan to get an overall idea about engineering before deciding to specialize in a certain field, with the wide range of minors the university is offering. USC combines its strengths of liberal and professional learning in encouraging students to pursue their goals in diverse fields; an inspiring quality which I'm sure would guide me through college.
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