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The Ultimate Controversy: Argument Essay [19]
Hi! I'm currently in 9th grade honors English, and my essay topic is "should juveniles be tried as adults or minors?".
This is my introduction paragraph:
The Ultimate ControversyThe term "justice" ...
The term "justice" defined in the dictionary is the quality of being just, righteous, equitable, or lawful. In February, 2008, a fellow American citizen was brutally murdered for practicing his freedom of rights. Rebecca Cathcart of The New York Times reports, "In recent weeks, the victim, Lawrence King, 15, had said publicly that he was gay, classmates said, enduring harassment from a group of schoolmates, including the 14-year-old boy charged in his death." Never the less, wearing feminine attire, deliberately puts Lawrence in an uncomfortable position; which will consequently make him a social outcast with other boys at the school. If found guilty, Brandon McInerney, who is being charged as an adult with premeditated hate crime, will face 52 years to life in prison. But is trying Brandon as an adult rather than a juvenile the right decision? This is a prominent controversy that encompasses United States courtrooms today; whether or not minors should be tried as adults. For years, the government clearly follows the policy "that no crime shall go unpunished", but will this guiding principle be the same for today?
An adolescent's judgment is partly based on the environment of their domestic life as well as normal uncontrollable behavior through the emissions of raging hormones. Brandon McInerney's father, who was recently arrested while being tried with two felonies, unconsciously sets an example for his son, saying that it is all right for committing illogical dreadful crimes based on hate. By living in this unsustainable environment, Brandon will not be able to gain the necessary skills to cope and maturely deal with situations which will surely emerge through various parts of his life. In spite of a child's ability to control their emotions during rough disputes, spontaneous reactions in their bodies may make irregular, volatile responses. Dr. Jay Geidd, chief of the brain imaging in the child psychiatry branch at the National Institute of Mental Health reports, "hormones...attributed the intense, combustible emotions and unpredictable behavior of teens to this biochemical onslaught." Brandon McInerney, as well as other juveniles, has a brain chemistry that makes them more likely to take risks and to be unable to fully understand the consequences of his actions.
At some point in time, society will have to assume that whether at the age of 14, or 21, a person is now capable of being responsible for his actions. Masen Davis, executive director of the Transgender Law Center reports, "Unfortunately...society has not matured at the same rate." Some people are responsible and morally developed at the age of thirteen, while some adults at age twenty-six, are struggling to exhibit noble conduct and act based on their morals. Brandon needs to understand in order to be morally fit in a society, he must learn how to deal with the demands of life and learn how to be resilient against harassment and embarrassment. He must always consider in mind that there is always hope encompassed in rough times.
Even though having a sociopath father, and raging hormones, Brandon overlooked the most important treasure he possesses, his heart, his mind, his body, himself. Everybody can tell him anything that comes to their mind, but Brandon has the power to accept it or not. Anti-violence officials are diligently putting their time and their own money to help improve the environments of the juvenile offenders, by instituting organizations, such as the "Boston Gun Project", which will reform juveniles into more precautious young adults, who will be able to adjust with the demands of life, but these teenage offenders lack the perseverance to achieve their goals. Several minors are just plainly giving up because they are afraid to fail. No matter how many times we assist the violent offenders, it is up to them if they want to change and live in a superior society, where there is plentiful peace and integrity.
Ultimately, Brandon McInerney and all juveniles who carry out premeditated and hate crimes must be tried as adults. A lesson needs to be taught to all juveniles who participate in these heinous acts and that mean's very real punishment, prison time. All minors who are capable of conducting mature actions must be able to accept full responsibility. In order for minors to fully enter the adult world, they must take that one stride, in which they can not only accept positive feedback from their superiors, but are also willing to accept constructive criticism and admit they are wrong; for which they will accept their punishment in a optimistic way. Once a minor fully comprehends and develops this principle, they will then live a pleasant, prosperous life.
Be sure to add any comments as to your desire.
Can you please, if there is any, give me advice on how to increase my vocabulary, to make my paragraph sound more sophisticated.
P.S. THANKSSSSSS!!!!!
