Undergraduate / 'Not fitting into a mold' - University of PennsylvaniaShort Answer [3]

I would really appreciate if people would critique this. I would like you to be especially hard on it. I will read your essays if you read mine!

A Penn education provides a liberal arts and sciences foundation across multiple disciplines with a practical emphasis in one of four undergraduate schools: the College of Arts and Sciences, the School of Engineering and Applied Science, the School of Nursing, or the Wharton School.

Given the undergraduate school to which you are applying, please discuss how you will engage academically at Penn.

I do not fit into a mold; I am an articulate maverick who incessantly combats against the status quo. I am enamored by the interaction between government and the governed, but I also want to establish a strong educational foundation for children. Where am I able to immerse myself in academic bliss within a metropolis full of ranging internship and volunteer opportunities, yet have at my disposal fifty countries to broaden my perspective in?

At the University of Pennsylvania, I do not have to adapt my interests to the offerings of the College of Arts and Sciences; we are a perfect match. Within the Political Science major, I will concentrate on the sub-field of American politics. I will be able to hone my studying to American political institutions and how they interact with the American people, in addition to political communications and public policy. With this approach, I will not have to adapt to real-world situations after graduation; I will have already encountered them in the progressive learning environment faculty members utilize.

In addition, I will have the opportunity to travel to Cape Town to learn about a new culture as I study the South African political system.

Lastly, as a student of the University of Pennsylvania, I will not only be a Quaker adorned in red and blue; I will also be a Philadelphian. I will partake in the initiative to increase children's performance in school by participating in the West Philadelphia Tutoring Project.

Penn and Philadelphia have always been global leaders in innovation and progress. Because I will not be forced to fit into a mold, I will utilize my drive, talents, and spirit as I emerge on the Philadelphian political and educational scene. Together, Penn, Philadelphia, and I will move forward.

Undergraduate / 'The streets of San José' --Applying to Penn, Georgetown, and UChicago [4]

This is the Common App essay I have made. It describes an event that has changed my life. Please be honest and tear it apart if needed. Thanks!

San José

"Our flight will be landing shortly," a flight attendant announced. I could see lava spewing out of a volcano as the airplane descended above the Costa Rican rainforest. As I surveyed the foreign land, my classmates surrounding me erupted into a cacophony of chatter; they discussed when they were going to post pictures on Facebook. Although I took many snapshots of the picturesque rainforest and beach, it was the people that I met-not the striking landscape-that has left a lasting impression on me.

As we rode through the streets of San Jose on the way to our resort, we passed through impoverished neighborhoods inhabited by stray dogs. The sheet metal houses were meager-a drastic contrast to the homes I am accustomed to seeing in American suburbia. A school that we visited two days into the trip did not have a gymnasium or athletic fields to house their physical education classes. However, in spite of the hardships the Costa Ricans face, their exhilarating spirit is contagious.

The children at a school we visited were filled with exuberance; they seemed to be oblivious about their economic status. I not only received genuine benevolence from the youth, but also the adults I met. Everyone greeted me with a wave and a smile; they were even more pleased when I spoke Spanish. Our tour guide, Enrique, described the people I met perfectly; "We may not have a lot of money like you do in America, but we are a happy people. We don't value materials much. We just love life."

My experience in Costa Rica taught me a quintessential lesson; one's contributions to society-not possessions- make a difference in this world. American culture emphasizes the importance of fame and fortune; the rich and famous have significant clout in this country. The media conveys that in order to make an impact, one must find a way to be seen on a television screen. Before I went to Costa Rica, I bought into this system of ideals; I believed that to make an imprint on this world, I had to have a six-figure salary. But as I traveled, I realized that having an impact on people's lives does not require wealth or fame.

The Costa Ricans I encountered did not have much money. Nevertheless, they looked at life with vivacity. It was then that I had an epiphany; the essence of life is to use one's knowledge, time, and talents to enrich others' lives. My trip to Costa Rica has driven me to use my education, personal attributes, and life experiences to benefit others in the same manner the Costa Ricans have benefited me. From this excursion, I discovered that I want to encourage those whose opinions are ignored and suppressed to continue to voice their concerns. For this reason, I desire to attend an institution of higher learning to receive a quality education that will enhance my skills needed to include more people in local, national, and international discussions.